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From the creator of the wildly successful You Suck at Piano series comes a guitar method book for adults. Because you suck at guitar.
1,545 backers pledged $38,667 to help bring this project to life.
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$38,667

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Are you the worst guitar player in the world?


 I  mean… do you really, really suck at guitar? Because that’s the name of  this book! Clearly it’s fate. You Suck at Guitar is designed to be a  brutally honest, completely ridiculous, and hopefully helpful way to  kickstart (see what I did there?) your terrible guitar skills into  slightly-less-terrible guitar skills. You can do it! Probably?


 If  the mysteries of music have largely remained a mystery for you - then  you need this book. If even picking up a guitar makes you look  completely and utterly awkward - then you need this book. If you enjoy  strangers (me) making fun of you from across the world - then you need  this book.
 



 The  key is honesty. Music books lie to you. They tell you that you are  doing great, when, in fact, you are not. We here at Sadsap Music (that’s  the name of the company I started to make these books) are more honest.  Your friends know you are bad at guitar. Your lovers know you are bad  at guitar. Even I know you are bad at guitar. So let’s fix it. Together.  But not TOO together, because there’s no way I can stomach listening to  you practice.

 


I’m  Dr. Joel Pierson, and I’ve made a career out of music and mockery. I’ve  worked with some artists of great repute (New York Philharmonic, Kronos  Quartet), and am well steeped in pop culture from working with artists  like Wayne Newton and Ke$ha and touring with My Chemical Romance and  Linkin Park.


 I’ve  performed on all seven continents (yes, including Antarctica), written  music for films (including additional music for The Internship with Owen  Wilson), and had a recording contract with Warner Brothers Records. I  have a Ph.D in music composition, and my music has been performed by  over 20 major symphony orchestras. I once sat in with the Saturday Night  Live band (I didn’t actually PLAY with the SNL band, I literally just  sat with them while they played, in case there was a piano-related  emergency.) Once I performed Let It Be for an audience of one: Paul  McCartney. 
 



 But  enough about me. This book is about YOU and how bad YOU are at all  things musical. Joining us on our craptacular journey is illustrator Jamie Chen, who I’m relatively certain is a real human being, like us. I  have no reason to question that she was born on Earth, just like you  and I. And it would certainly be inappropriate to assume that as a baby she was dropped off in the Bay Area by aliens in a wicker basket. So  everything is completely normal with Jamie.

 


Believe  it or not, most music publishers think that mocking their customers is a  BAD idea. Huh! So I’ve turned to Kickstarter for funding. 2 years ago  my first book, You Suck at Piano, raised over $80,000. I followed that  campaign up with 2 additional books: You Suck at Piano 2: You Still  Suck, and 20 Piano Pieces for People with Emotional Problems. And now we  tackle guitar!

Risks and challenges

Obviously I can’t do this alone and need your help! I need you and your terrible guitar playing. Just as we did with "You Suck at Piano", "You Suck at Piano 2: You Still Suck", and "20 Piano Pieces with Emotional Problems", we need to get this initial funding with help from our illustrator, book designer, marketing, etc.

My goal is to get You Suck at Guitar finished, printed, and shipped by summer. Because what else are you really accomplishing this summer? So please donate to the cause, and thank you for your support!

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  1. Select this reward

    Pledge US$ 1 or more About US$ 1

    Thank you!

    You are acknowledging to yourself that you too suck at guitar. Congrats on being so self-aware. I’ll send you free updates and I will write you an email telling you how bad I imagine you are at guitar.

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    Pledge US$ 10 or more About US$ 10

    You Suck at Guitar (Digital Copy)

    A digital copy of You Suck at Guitar + access to updates.

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    360 backers
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    Pledge US$ 10 or more About US$ 10

    You Suck at Piano (digital copy)

    A digital copy of the original You Suck At Piano Book + access to updates.

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    31 backers
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    Pledge US$ 15 or more About US$ 15

    You Suck at Guitar (physical + digital)

    A physical (& digital) copy of You Suck at Guitar + access to updates.

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    Ships to Anywhere in the world
    539 backers
    $

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  5. Select this reward

    Pledge US$ 15 or more About US$ 15

    YSAG + YSAP (digital)

    You Suck at Guitar + You Suck at Piano (digital copies) + access to updates.

    Includes:
    • a digital copy of You Suck at Piano
    • a digital copy of You Suck at Guitar
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    198 backers
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    Pledge US$ 25 or more About US$ 25

    YSAG + YSAP (physical & digital)

    You Suck at Guitar + You Suck at Piano physical + digital copies + access to updates.

    Includes:
    • a digital copy of You Suck at Guitar
    • a digital copy of You Suck at Piano
    • physical copy of You Suck at Guitar
    • physical copy of You Suck at Piano
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    Ships to Anywhere in the world
    158 backers
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  7. Select this reward

    Pledge US$ 30 or more About US$ 30

    2 copies of YSAG for you & a Friend

    2 copies of YSAG: 1 for you, and 1 for anyone you choose with a personalized note from me about how bad they are. I’m going to ship the second book directly to whomever you like wants, without saying who sent it + updates.

    Includes:
    • a digital copy of You Suck at Guitar
    • physical copy of You Suck at Guitar
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    Ships to Anywhere in the world
    Limited 4 backers
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    Pledge US$ 35 or more About US$ 35

    The You Suck at Piano Starter Pack

    The You Suck at Piano Starter Pack (3 books, physical + digital copies)

    Includes:
    • a digital copy of You Suck at Piano
    • physical copy of You Suck at Piano
    • digital copy You Suck at Piano 2 : You Still Suck
    • physical copy of You Suck at Piano 2: You Still Suck
    • digital copy 20 Piano Pieces for People with Emotional Problems
    • physical copy 20 Piano Pieces for People with Emotional Problems
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    Ships to Anywhere in the world
    11 backers
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    Pledge US$ 40 or more About US$ 40

    The Sadsap Music Starter Pack (DIGITAL)

    The Sadsap Music Starter Pack (4 books as digital copies only)

    Includes:
    • a digital copy of You Suck at Guitar
    • digital copy You Suck at Piano 2 : You Still Suck
    • a digital copy of You Suck at Piano
    • digital copy 20 Piano Pieces for People with Emotional Problems
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    44 backers
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    Pledge US$ 45 or more About US$ 45

    The Sadsap Music Starter Pack (4 books)

    The Sadsap Music Starter Pack (4 books, physical + digital copies).

    (Early bird pricing ends after 48 hours after launch.)

    Includes:
    • a digital copy of You Suck at Guitar
    • physical copy of You Suck at Guitar
    • a digital copy of You Suck at Piano
    • physical copy of You Suck at Piano
    • digital copy You Suck at Piano 2 : You Still Suck
    • physical copy of You Suck at Piano 2: You Still Suck
    • digital copy 20 Piano Pieces for People with Emotional Problems
    • physical copy 20 Piano Pieces for People with Emotional Problems
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    Ships to Anywhere in the world
    Limited 139 backers
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    Pledge US$ 55 or more About US$ 55

    You Suck at Guitar Tote Bag

    You Suck at Guitar tote bag + physical & digital copies of YSAG + access to updates.

    Includes:
    • a digital copy of You Suck at Guitar
    • physical copy of You Suck at Guitar
    • You Suck at Guitar Tote bag
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    Ships to Anywhere in the world
    Limited 6 backers
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    Pledge US$ 65 or more About US$ 65

    You Suck at Guitar Socks

    You Suck at Guitar socks + physical and digital copies of You Suck at Guitar + access to updates.

    Includes:
    • a digital copy of You Suck at Guitar
    • physical copy of You Suck at Guitar
    • You Suck at Guitar Socks
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    Ships to Anywhere in the world
    Limited 2 backers
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    Pledge US$ 80 or more About US$ 80

    Customized Illustration

    A hand (or computer) illustrated picture of you getting smashed in the head with a guitar wielded by your favorite guitarist + physical and digital copies of You Suck at Guitar + access to updates.

    Includes:
    • a digital copy of You Suck at Guitar
    • physical copy of You Suck at Guitar
    • Customized Illustration
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    Ships to Anywhere in the world
    Limited 6 backers
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  14. Select this reward

    Pledge US$ 90 or more About US$ 90

    YSAG Throw Pillow Cover

    A throw pillow (cover only) that says "I Suck at Guitar" on it + physical and digital copies of You Suck at Guitar + access to updates.

    Includes:
    • a digital copy of You Suck at Guitar
    • physical copy of You Suck at Guitar
    • YSAG Throw Pillow Cover
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    Ships to Anywhere in the world
    Limited 0 backers
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    Pledge US$ 100 or more About US$ 100

    YSAG Socks + Tote Bag

    You Suck at Guitar Socks + tote page + physical and digital copies of the book + access to updates.

    Includes:
    • You Suck at Guitar Socks
    • You Suck at Guitar Tote bag
    • physical copy of You Suck at Guitar
    • a digital copy of You Suck at Guitar
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    Ships to Anywhere in the world
    Limited 1 backer
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  16. Select this reward

    Pledge US$ 150 or more About US$ 150

    Guitar Starter Kit

    The guitar starter kit includes the YSAP tote bag, a capo, a guitar strap, earplugs, a tuner, a physical and digital copy of the You Suck at Guitar book + access to updates.

    Includes:
    • You Suck at Guitar Tote bag
    • a digital copy of You Suck at Guitar
    • physical copy of You Suck at Guitar
    • Capo
    • Guitar Strap
    • Ear plugs
    • Tuner
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    Ships to Only United States
    Limited 1 backer
    $

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    Pledge US$ 250 or more About US$ 250

    DELUXE: Guitar Starter Kit

    The deluxe guitar starter kit includes a physical and digital copy of the book, the tote bag, capo, ear plugs, tuner, and a hand bedazzled guitar strap by yours truly, Dr. Joel Pierson.

    Includes:
    • a digital copy of You Suck at Guitar
    • physical copy of You Suck at Guitar
    • Capo
    • Ear plugs
    • Tuner
    • You Suck at Guitar Tote bag
    • Custom bedazzled guitar strap
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    Ships to Only United States
    Limited 0 backers
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    Pledge US$ 500 or more About US$ 500

    Hand Painted Acoustic Guitar

    An acoustic guitar, handpainted by the illustrator + a physical and digital copy of You Suck at Guitar + access to updates

    Includes:
    • a digital copy of You Suck at Guitar
    • physical copy of You Suck at Guitar
    • Customized painted acoustic guitar
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    Ships to Only United States
    Limited 1 backer
    $

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  19. Select this reward

    Pledge US$ 500 or more About US$ 500

    Hand Painted Electric Guitar

    A handpainted electric guitar from the YSAG illustrator + a physical and digital copy of the book + access to updates.

    Includes:
    • a digital copy of You Suck at Guitar
    • physical copy of You Suck at Guitar
    • Hand Painted electric Guitar
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    Ships to Only United States
    Limited 0 backers
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  20. Select this reward

    Pledge US$ 2,000 or more About US$ 2,000

    The Great Guitar Heist

    I will fly to Dallas, break into my father-in-law's home, steal a guitar, and mail it to you along with a physical and digital copy of You Suck at Guitar + access to updates.

    Includes:
    • a digital copy of You Suck at Guitar
    • physical copy of You Suck at Guitar
    • Stolen Guitar
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    Ships to Only United States
    Limited 0 backers
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  21. Reward no longer available

    Pledge US$ 40 or more About US$ 40

    The Sadsap Music Starter Pack (4 books)

    The Sadsap Music Starter Pack (4 books, physical + digital copies)

    Includes:
    • a digital copy of You Suck at Guitar
    • physical copy of You Suck at Guitar
    • a digital copy of You Suck at Piano
    • physical copy of You Suck at Piano
    • digital copy You Suck at Piano 2 : You Still Suck
    • physical copy of You Suck at Piano 2: You Still Suck
    • digital copy 20 Piano Pieces for People with Emotional Problems
    • physical copy 20 Piano Pieces for People with Emotional Problems
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    Ships to Anywhere in the world
    Reward no longer available 30 backers
    $

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Funding period

- (30 days)