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Not for TREND. Not for CORPORATE ATTITUDE. Not for STONER. Only true DOOM-MURDER HEADS.

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We made it! Thank you everybody! Please check out our updates here! We have more news to come!

Update #5 - Livestreaming at 5 PM EST Tomorrow!!

Update #4 - Stretch goals: destroyed. New goals, ToG game pack vid. Mama mia!

Update #3 - We're at the $65k goal! PayPal! Art!

Update #2 - Mac Port, Stretch Goals, New Pledge Rewards, More!

Update #1 - We made it! Thank you everybody!

New Stretch Goal Info and Old Stretch Goal Info

We just made $50,000 so we can guarantee a Mac port! We're so close to so many more! The more you contribute to Barkley 2, the longer we'll be able to work on this game full-time, which directly translates to a bigger, better, funnier experience. We have a lot of great stretch goals lined up and we may have more to come, so check them out here!

Indie edutainment moguls Tales of Game's Studios are pleased to announce The Magical Realms of Tír na nÓg: Escape from Necron 7 - Revenge of Cuchulainn: The Official Game of the Movie - Chapter 2 of the Hoopz Barkley SaGa, the sequel to our 2008 roleplaying hit Barkley, Shut Up and Jam: Gaiden. Colloquially called Barkley 2, it is the action roleplaying continuation of the riveting and intensely canon Hoopz Barkley SaGa.

The year is 666X. A powerful youngster, wise beyond his years, awakens from a B-Ball induced coma aboard the mysterious dwarf space ziggurat Necron 7, held captive by the Malevolent A.I. Cuchulainn. With no memory of who he is or where he came from, he adopts the identity of X114JAM9 and sets off into the Post-Cyberpocalyptic Wasteland in search of the enigmatic Cyberdwarf, the only one who can reveal to him the terrible truth behind his forgotten past and make sense of his harrowing future. Barkley 2 is a coming of age story, a story about love, hope, betrayal and redemption. It is a story about identity and sacrifice, a story about wayward jocks struggling for a purpose. It is a story about the trials of our dystopian future and most importantly...

...it is a story about You.

Barkley 2 is an open world action roleplaying game with heavy emphasis on exploration, choice, character development and discovery. It combines the focus on strong characters and narrative of Eastern RPGs with the non-linearity and openness of Western RPGs, drawing on the best ideas from titles like Realms of Arkania, Fallout, Dark Souls, Romancing SaGa, Dark Sun, Elder Scrolls: Daggerfall and Shin Megami Tensei: Nocturne. It is a game that combines core roleplaying ideas like character creation and development, quests and choices and consequences with fast-paced, action oriented combat (think Soldat meets Zelda) and Tales of Game's unique and erotic sense of humor. In short: this ain't your grandpa's rollenspiel.

Some of the things Barkley 2 features:

  • Things Change Over Time - People, places and quests change over time; the things you experience might be completely different from what your friends experience because you did them at different times. The official Big Idea behind Barkley 2 is that everyone will have a different game - things changing over time is the backbone of this idea.

  • Large, Open World - The Necron 7 is a large, open environment with dozens of areas to explore. There are things to find in every corner and secrets everywhere - this is a game all about exploration.

  • Edutainment

  • Fast-paced Action RPG Combat - Barkley 2 has mouse-aimed shooting gameplay that takes inspiration from action games like Crimsonland and Soldat, but also RPGs like Dark Souls and Gothic. Stats, classes and an incredibly deep character creation system give you complete control over your character; we want to make Barkley 2 a game that is not only funny, but fun to play.

  • Randomized Gun's System - Gun's are randomized through a complex system similar to Diablo's or Borderland's, offering millions of possibilities. Shotgun's that shoot ooze, machine gun rocket launchers and gravity rifles are just the tip of the iceberg of our gun's system. Even more than this, you can fuse gun's together in a system similar to demon fusing from the Shin Megami Tensei and Persona series. The weapon combinations are nearly unlimited.

  • DwarfNET - Connect with fellow dwarfs and dwarf enthusiasts on the in-game DwarfNET message board. Jack your cranial USB into the data matrix and search for clues or chat with tech-savvy dwarfs about vidcons, layups and the latest jock news through the amazing power of bio-cybernetic technology. 

  • ...and more?

Still not convinced Barkley 2 is the game for you? Take a look at this chart -

We're offering some great rewards for helping us make this game a reality. Please check them out!

$10 Reward - Digital PC Download

At the $10 backer level, you'll get the full game when it's complete! Thank you for helping us make Barkley 2!

$15 Reward - Exclusive In-game Secret and Wallpapers + previous reward

Barkley 2 is a game all about secrets - there are hundreds of them scattered all throughout the Necron 7. At the $15 level, you'll get the game as well as a tip detailing one of the hundreds of in-game secrets. One person may even get the location of the legendary four library cards. . .

You'll also get several rockin' wallpapers made by Francis Coulombe and Richard Tran!

$25 Reward - Barkley 2 Soundtrack + previous rewards

In addition to all previous rewards, you'll also get a digital download of the Barkley 2 soundtrack with the game! The music is being composed by world renowned turd idiot Eric "cboyardee" Shumaker, whose music is largely unlistenable. Check out this bad boy -

So far there are about 20 songs written for Barkley 2. You'll receive all of the finished songs now to whet your appetite and the full soundtrack when the game is released.

$40 Reward - ToG Music Pack AND Exclusive Monthly Updates + previous rewards

At the $40 reward level, you'll receive every game soundtrack Eric "cboyardee" Shumaker has ever worked on. This music pack contains over 100 songs of all styles, from Genesis and NES chiptunes to Post-Cyberpocalyptic soundscapes from games like Station 37, Non Human, Mountain of Debt and Recession. Check out the medley of tunes below!

Mama mia!

In addition to the kickin' tunez, you'll also get VIP access to exclusive behind the scenes updates and content by the ToGsters detailing the progress we've made, what we're working on, what we want to do with the game and anything else we can think of! We want the update to be informal and personal - a letter from us to you, not a dry, boring progress report.

$60 - ToG Vidcon Pack + previous rewards

At the $60 level, you'll get a pack that includes all the games Tales of Game's has ever released, plus dozens we've worked on independently. This includes games like Station 37, Techno Chopper, Mountain of Debt, which won first place at the Something Awful 2011 summer contest and even a demo for Non-Human, a game Frankie and cboyardee have been working on for the past 2 years, but also more obscure ToG oddities as well. This pack includes tons of games - enough to keep you occupied until Barkley 2 comes out.

$75 Reward - Digital download of the Barkleynomicon artbook + previous rewards

At $75, you'll get a digital download of the Barkleynomicon, an artbook featuring the incredible work of Francis "Frankiesmileshow" Coulombe, David "Toadstone" Nyari and Richard "Medieve" Tran. The Barkley 2 artbook may even contain an exclusive comic . . .

$100 Reward - Cyberdwarf Body Pillow + previous rewards

At the $100 level, in addition to all the previous rewards, you get a custom, full-sized Cyberdwarf body pillow to spend your lonely nights with. Though his knotted b-ball skin is rough, his touch is tender and his luscious applebottom is shapely domed. The Cyberdwarf body pillow ships with pillow case only, pillow not provided. Warning: Cyberdwarf is a well-established tsundere.

$150 Level - Exclusive Access to the ToG Tip line + previous rewards

The $150 tier is one we're really looking forward to! At $150, you'll have exclusive access to the Tales of Game's tip line, a phone line manned by the Tales of Game's developers during the month following the game's release. If you're stuck in the game or need a little extra help, just give us a call. Alternatively, call us and scream about how bad the game is.

$250 Level - Barkleynomicon Art Book + previous rewards

At the $250 reward level, you'll get the Barkleynomicon, the Barkley 2 art book featuring the work of our incredibly talented artists Francis Coulombe, David Nyari and Richard Tran. The art book will feature concept art, sketches, in-game art and possibly even an exclusive Barkley 2 comic!

$300 Level - Become an in-game portrait + previous rewards

At the $300 level, you have the opportunity to have your face become an in-game portrait selectable during character creation. Brag to your friends, parents and pets that your mug is digitally pixelized into Barkley canon for all eternity. Your face may even be used for an NPC!

$420 Reward - Become a poster on DwarfNET + previous rewards

Jack in . . . to DwarfNET. This tier allows limited pledgers to be immortalized in the DwarfNET forums. Create your own screen name, avatar and signature and help X114JAM9 make sense of his mysterious journey through in-game cybernetic information exchange technology.

$500 Reward - Animated forum signature made by cboyardee + previous rewards

At the $500 reward level, Eric "cboyardee" Shumaker will make you an animated forum signature (or whatever kind of picture you would like!) in the style of his youtube films. You design the picture; tell cboyardee to make whatever you want and he will animate it.

$1000 - Pose as Tales of Game's during an interview + previous rewards

The $1000 level is the tier we're most excited about. Being at the vanguard of the edutainment revolution, Tales of Game's is often prompted for interviews about our games, our ideas and of course, global politics. At the $1000 level, we will have one person take our place during an interview - you will pretend to be us. We won't announce the switch before or after - say whatever you want, talk about fake games, make things up, ruin our sterling reputation. The terrible possibilities are limitless.

$1200 Reward - Create a unique, in-game encounter with Tales of Game's + previous rewards

The $1200 pledge reward is a very special opportunity to work alongside Tales of Game's in creating 5 special encounters for X114JAM9 and his team. You design your own game encounter, be it a boss fight, a special puzzle, or interesting mini-game. We’ll bring your ideas to life in glorious sprite-based vidcon action.

We are also very excited to announce that in addition to Barkley 2, we are also releasing a Mac port of Barkley, Shut Up and Jam: Gaiden for free. Ported by Leon Arnott, the Barkley Mac port and original PC versions are available completely for free on the Tales of Game's site. Please check them out if you haven't played them!

The footage in the video represents very early development - there is still a lot to do and we estimate that the full game will take another year - but we hope it's enough to get you moistened up and ready for more. Barkley 2 is a game we are very, very excited about and we hope it's something that you'll enjoy not just for its bizarre humor, but for being a great RPG!

Everyone at Tales of Game's Studios is extremely excited about Barkley 2, a game that we've been concocting for years and is long overdue. We want to make this game even better, even funnier and even more fun than the original and we've finally got the team and the means to do it. Close your eyes, open your heart and jack into the ToG Revolution because if you can't slam with the best, then jam with the rest.

Find out more about the game at www.talesofgames.com, follow us on twitter at @talesofgames and contact us for more info at contact@talesofgames.com

Risks and challenges Learn about accountability on Kickstarter

The Tales of Game's team has collectively worked on dozens of games of all genres. We have experienced programmers, artists, musicians and designers who are excited about this game and have been thinking about it for years. We have set extremely ambitious goals for ourselves, but have a proven track record of exceptional work and are looking forward to the task ahead of us.

+

chaos dunks.

FAQ

  • We are being incredibly careful about copyrights - we've talked to lawyers and have been given the okay. Everything we're doing is completely legal; we're not using ripped art and assets this time around and you'll notice we've been very careful about throwing around Charles Barkley's name!!

    Last updated:
  • Barkley 2 is being made in Game Maker, the same engine the original was made in. We have been discussing the possibility of importing saves from the original Barkley, which would be possible in GM. . .

    Last updated:
  • The current estimate is late 2013 or early 2014. We've done a lot of good work so far but we've got a long way to go!

    Last updated:
  • We made the original Barkley when we were (wise and powerful) youngsters with few responsibilities or expenses. Unfortunately, we have been thrust into the cruel world of adults, where we have expenses, bills, school payments and other stupid BS the man does to keep us down. Ideally, Barkley 2 would be a free game just like the original, but unfortunately we just can't do that. That's a big part of the reason why it's taken us so long to work on this, because we just did not have the capital means to make it!

    Last updated:
  • There are a lot of reasons! First is that this is the game we want to make and it's been our intention to make Barkley 2 an action RPG since before the original Barkley was even out. We have a lot of really great ideas to make this a game that is as fun as it is funny, which wasn't really the case with the original. Lastly, turn-based RPGs where you only control one character generally aren't very fun!

    Last updated:
  • No, this is not for TREND. Not for CORPORATE ATTITUDE. Not for STONER. Only TRUE DOOM-MURDERHEADS.

    Last updated:
  • Our long term goal is to get this on as many distribution platforms as possible - Steam, Desura, GoG.com and more - but we cannot promise anything before we actually do it. We will be submitting our game to each of these services when it's in a state ready to be reviewed. It would be really nice if we could promise right now that it will be on Steam, but that is a long way away and we do not want to promise anything I cannot guarantee.

    Last updated:
  • NO.

    Last updated:
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  • Pledge $10 or more
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    2281 backers

    Digital PC download of The Magical Realms of Tir na Nog: Escape from Necron 7 - The Revenge of Cuchulainn: The Official Game of the Movie - Chapter 2 of the Hoopz Barkley SaGa. Mama mia!

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    Secret tip + PC download of Barkley 2 Barkley 2 is a game all about secrets, hidden areas, exploration and discovery; there are hundreds, if not thousands of secrets! At the $15 level, you'll get a digital PC download of the game AND we'll tell you one of several hundred in-game secrets. One person may even get the ~U.L.T.I.M.A.T.E.~ secret - the location of all four library cards.

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    Digital Barkley 2 soundtrack download + all previous rewards. The $25 tier gets you a digital download of the entire Barkley 2 soundtrack when it's completed. The music is being made by Eric "cboyardee" Shumaker, who has produced music for games like Station 37 and the original Barkley. He is not a very good musician.

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    Every game soundtrack cboyardee has worked on + all previous rewards. Not only will you get the Barkley 2 soundtrack when it's completed, you'll also get every video game soundtrack cboyardee has ever worked on. Suffer through hundreds of poorly-made, unlistenable dirges from dozens of shovelware titles! This pledge level includes the 20+ songs that have already been written for Barkley 2.

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    341 backers

    ToG vidcon pack + all previous rewards. The ToG vidcon pack includes every game Tales of Game's has released plus dozens of obscure goodies, demos and games its members have released or are currently working on independently. Includes the games 78641, Sewer Goblet, Mountain of Debt, Station 37, an exclusive demo of NonHuman and many, many more!

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    130 backers

    Digital download of the Barkley 2 artbook + previous rewards. Get a PDF digital download of the Barkleynomicon artbook featuring the incredible work of Francis "Frankiesmileshow" Coulombe, David "Toadstone" Nyari and Richard "Medieve" Tran. The Barkley 2 artbook may even contain an exclusive comic . . .

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    149 backers

    Full-size Cyberdwarf body pillow + all previous rewards. Share your cold nights and warm applebottom with a full-size Cyberdwarf body pillow (or dakimakura for my enlightened brothers). Horrendously burned in a fire, Cyberdwarf's life was saved only after having basketballs grafted over his skin. He's lonely and looking for love, but be careful - he bites! The Cyberdwarf body pillow comes with just the case, not the pillow.

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    Exclusive access to the Tales of Game's tip line + all previous rewards. Stuck on a tough boss or need some help finding the Cyberspear? No problem, give the Tales of Game's phone tip line a call. At the $150 level, you get access to the ToG tip line manned by the developers themselves. Ask for help or yell at us about how disappointing our game is.

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    Barkleynomicon art book + all previous rewards. At the $250 level, you get the Barkleynomicon, an artbook featuring the incredible work of Francis "Frankiesmileshow" Coulombe, David "Toadstone" Nyari and Richard "Medieve" Tran. The Barkley 2 artbook may even contain an exclusive comic. . .

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    Become a playable character portrait + all previous rewards. Become an immortal part of Barkley C.A.N.O.N. by making your face one of the in-game character portraits selectable during character creation. Who knows, you may even see an NPC with your face. Fedoras and double chins wanted!

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    Have your name, avatar and signature immortalized in DwarfNET + previous rewards. Jack in . . . to DwarfNET. This tier allows pledgers to be immortalized in the DwarfNET forums. Create your own screen name, avatar and signature and help X114JAM9 make sense of his mysterious journey through in-game cybernetic information exchange technology.

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    Custom animated forum signature + all previous rewards. In addition to all previous rewards, cboyardee will make you a custom animated forum signature (or similar image) in the style of his "Dilbert 3", "Oldest Trick in the Book" and "Ghostly Return" Youtube videos. You specify what you want and cboyardee will do his best (worst) to make it!

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    Pose as Tales of Game's during an interview + all previous rewards. Being a prestigious edutainment vidcon corporation, Tales of Game's is often interviewed by the gaming media. At the $1000 reward tier, you will impersonate us during an interview - if the interview is through email, we will redirect all questions to you and if it is in person, you will pose as a member of the Tales of Game's team. Answer questions however you want, make things up, ruin our reputation, throw your feces, have a blast! We will not announce the switch before or after - it is a secret! Go nuts!

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    Create a unique in-game encounter + previous rewards (except interview). Very special opportunity to work alongside Tales of Games in creating a special encounter for X114JAM9 and his team. You design your own game encounter, be it a boss fight, a special puzzle, or interesting mini-game. We’ll bring your ideas to life in glorious sprite-based vidcon action.

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    Have lunch with pictures of the developers + all previous rewards but the interview. The ultimate reward for Tales of Game's biggest fans. We will send you pictures of every developer in Tales of Game's for you to have lunch with. Tell them your great game ideas or how much you liked Barkley. No kissing on the lips. You are responsible for the cost of lunch.

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