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The Spectacular Simon Burchwood: new fiction novel by indie writer / cartoonist Scott Semegran. A bunch of words = good times!

My name is Scott Semegran and I'm a writer and a cartoonist. I like to draw silly animals that cuss and discuss existential dilemmas. I like to write novels and short stories that make people laugh, cry, and pee their pants. That's my thing. In the past, I pursued traditional publishing avenues; I had a literary agent, I submitted my work to big publishers, but that process was just so BORING. I'm an indie author at heart. It's very punk rock, I must say. As Lee Ving of the punk rock band Fear once sang so famously on Saturday Night Live, "She don't like fashions, she don't like phonies. She just wants my beef baloney." Exactly, Lee. Exactly.

The freedom of being an indie author is fantastic but, I must admit, it has its drawbacks as well. Unlike big publishers, I do not have proofreaders, editors, graphic designers, publicists, and marketers at my beck and call. But that is where you come in, kind patrons of Kickstarter.com. I need money to hire these lovely freelancers to help with my novel. Isn't that the professional thing to do? A good proofreader / editor will cost me a few hundy, at least. And a good publicist? Anywhere from $1,000 to $3,000 a month.

Holy crap!

That's not chump change. But here's the thing, with our media centric and internet obsessed society, writing an indie novel and just throwing it out there is a lot like tossing a gold nugget into a large lake. If you're lucky enough to have someone witness you tossing it, then that one person may jump in and look for it. But if you have thousands of people watching you, then hopefully they will all jump in and search for that treasure. Who doesn't want a nugget of gold to call their own? I'm hoping to get a quality novel in front of as many eyeballs as possible.

So why am I here? I'm writing the second novel in a series of books about a guy named Simon Burchwood. The first novel is titled, "The Meteoric Rise of Simon Burchwood." The second is aptly titled, "The Spectacular Simon Burchwood." Simon is egotistical. He is arrogant. He is an a$$hole. He is not so different than you or me. To paraphrase a review of the first book in this series, "Simon is not a very likable guy; as a matter of fact, he is a self-centered, pompous jerk. But for some reason, it’s pretty fun to be inside his head." I think you will agree. Fun is the keyword here. I'm currently seven chapters into my manuscript. I plan on writing 25 chapters. That's a lot of words, words, words but it will be so worth it. Trust me! The theme for this novel is, "Why does life have to be so hard?" We will find out from the unique perspective of the one and only, Simon Burchwood.

But seriously, folks, writing is hard. Publishing books is hard. The internet has made distributing books a whole lot easier for us punk rock indie writers but we need a good support system. Did you know that many of the greatest writers in history had patrons? William Shakespeare had patrons. Percy Shelley had patrons. Henry Miller had patrons, hookers, and drug dealers. And by no means, mind you, am I asking for you to provide me hookers and drug dealers or am I comparing myself to Shakespeare, Shelley, or Miller. I am only asking for your support. I'm striving to be great. And with your support, I can accomplish my goal.

As I said, I'm currently about 25% into my new book. With your kind support, I plan on hiring a kick a$$ proofreader / editor and a kick a$$ literary publicist. I plan on printing a small run of limited edition books of "The Spectacular Simon Burchwood," many of which will go directly to my patrons. I plan on distributing the eBook version through Smashwords.com, whose distribution channel includes iBooks, Barnes & Noble, Sony, Kobo, Amazon, and more. I plan on distributing on-demand print versions through Lulu.com (for the luddites who like to kill trees and feel the leafy carcasses in their hands. Just kidding, kind of). I illustrate the book covers myself (did I mention I'm a cartoonist?). And I design the print and eBook layouts as well. It's going to be so much fun and I hope you get as much satisfaction out of it as I do.

Thanks for reading about my project and thanks, in advance, for giving me your support. I'm honored and humbled.

I'll leave you with the perfect salutation, one so eloquently bestowed to us by RZA from the Wu-Tang Clan, "Konichiwa, b!tches." Exactly, RZA. Exactly.

Cover of "The Spectacular Simon Burchwood"

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    Pledges of $500 or more will get EVERYTHING listed above plus, above all, an acknowledgment to the world that you are a complete bad a$$ and went above and beyond the call of duty. What can I say? I salute you sir or madam. Enough said.

Funding period

- (40 days)