Hi beautiful humans,
The other week, at the end of a client session as we were standing at my front door saying our goodbyes, my client asked as a random aside...
By the way, why is your book taking so long to finish?
I sigh-smiled, paused for a moment, then told her the truth:
You know, I've had to live the material all the way through. I'm not delivering this book from my head. It's a book of lived wisdom and inquiry, felt-sense knowing and felt-sense not-knowing. Ideological blahblahblah is easy. Transmitted essence takes time. Also... I've started over three times.
We laughed. She understood immediately because we'd been moving through that very process together – the one of felt-sense understanding over intellectualized pretense. The one of iteration and depth over superficial "completion". She'd learned it's not fast. It's deep.
So many of us didn't grow up in a culture that makes room for developmental growth, for wisdom to form at it's own honest pace. We rush ourselves into roles of pre-emptive expertise. We've lost so much of the long-term apprentice model that was once the path to earned and embodied expertise.
I'm understanding more and more what Audre Lorde so famously wrote – the master's tools will never dismantle the master's house. The rush of Collapse Culture will never deliver the depth needed for the new world we're co-creating together.
ReBloom is a book with big aims towards personal and collective healing, liberation even, after personal and collective trauma... in sex, in love, in community. I'm devoted to embodying its medicine as I create it, as opposed to writing it at a shallow, rushed or traumatic-to-me pace.
When I first launched the Kickstarter for this book, I didn't have that awareness. I was still trying to operate from the speed of Collapse Culture. I thought everything I needed to write was already formed inside of me. But my body and spirit (which I'd learned to listen to well enough, thankfully) wouldn't let me. The medicine of the work I'd been studying and teaching worked on me... slowed me down.
Last week, I had the chance to talk with esteemed intellect Daniel Schmachtenberger about my book. I told him it's taking a much longer time to write than I'd expected, for the reasons mentioned above. His response was both helpful and affirming.
You know, Sex at Dawn and The Catcher and the Rye took 10 years to write. Harry Potter took 5 years to PLAN before ever putting fingers to keyboard. We don't need more quick fix surface-level books, he whispered, blue eyes piercing with clarity. We need more depth delivered with devotion.
I exhaled big thanks.
On to you –
Because I care about your trust and appreciate your support, let me loop you in with some of the slow and meaningful ways I've been devoting to ReBloom over the last 18 months:
- I've written and re-written 80% of the book. (240 page manuscript so far...)
- I've done thorough multiple-part interview processes with 7 "ReBloom Role Models" about their personal post-traumatic growth stories, most of whom have different backgrounds and intersecting identities than mine.
- I've explored the publishing route, had meetings with high-level authors and publishing people, sought lots of council about the best way to get this medicine out into the world.
- I've woven a colorful, animated allegory throughout the book that makes the whole picture more digestible and potent.
- I've made altar cards that refine the wisdom of the ReBloom Model (PDFs right here if you want to get an early peek at the magic!!), and a Coherence Practice has emerged, with which one can awaken the 7 Natural Blueprints of Health through movement and mantra.
- I've envisioned the interior design that will feel like art, blessing and miracle to hold.
- I've been studying the influence of systemic oppression on physiology, as well as consulted with a few experts on cultural trauma.
- I've trained 10 coaches in the ReBloom Model, featured the specifics of this material at workshops for over 20 people, and taught it to a dozen 1-1 clients. Through teaching and facilitating, I've learned even more about this body of work, and what I've learned has woven back into the body of the book. This material is so alive.
I am so grateful I get to invest in this book and body of work with rigor and devotion every day. And you will absolutely benefit more from the extra time it's taking. There is an unexpected depth in delays, and I'm celebrating that the delay of ReBloom has only strengthened its medicine. Thank you for trusting the timing with me.
Just yesterday, I finished running a 4-day ReBloom Your Sexuality workshop. The 10 women who came received so much about how to heal their relationships to love and sex by embodying the ReBloom Archetypes. We spent most of our time connecting to Worthiness (the Soul Seed) and Sovereignty (the Gatekeeper)... the ability to know what we need and then receive those needs safely, the ability to honor and protect embodied and emotional limits. When we build conditions of health personally and interpersonally, the natural emergence of amazing sexuality can bloom. Sometimes without even focusing on sex! There is so much on this topic in ReBloom, and I can't wait to share it with you.
Again, you can view and download the Altar Cards that go through each Blueprint and Imprint right here, if you'd like to dive into the medicine of this work today.
Thank you, thank you, sweet brave souls, for your patience and your trust in my creative process. For honoring the natural emergence of this book. For your continued excitement and love! I am so so grateful for you... and wildly excited to birth this book in the most divine timing.
Here's to reblooming the whole damn garden...together.