The fucking book is being made
Yes that's right, the book is being made as I type this.
If you can’t be fucked with a load of reading and you don’t care when your stuff arrives, just read this paragraph. I will be closing the ability to edit your delivery address on Wednesday 21st October. So from that point onwards, you won’t be able to ammend your address. If you have moved house or work since you backed the kickstarter, make sure you make the address change in the next week. Thankyou.
The book is currently in production and it’s looking fucking nice. Darren and myself popped over to Italy last week and saw the thing being printed in a small industrial estate surrounded by snowcapped mountains. As promised in the Kickstarter campaign, we did get it printed by a specialist high end fine art book printers who gave us a very bespoke service with a lot of care and attention. We saw 12 tonnes of very expensive paper (170gsm Munken Polar Rough Crisp White if you’re interested) going through a Heidelberg Speedmaster press and coming out the other end with a load of swear words and cocks on. Every artwork was meticulously studied and compared with proofs to make sure all the colours and everything are fucking bang on. There’s also a section of blue paper in the back of the book just for the fucking sake of spending extra money on it and making it more special. The book has cold glue, lay flat binding. I’ve no idea what that fucking means but apparently it’s a good thing. The ‘up yours’ bookmark is also in production in the UK and it's looking nice!
So, when should you expect your fucking rewards? Most of them were promised to be delivered in October, but in the spirit of almost all kickstarter projects, I am behind on my delivery schedule by a few weeks. But that’s normal right? That’s crowdfunding, it’s a bit unpredictable and things don’t always go exactly as planned. The main problem (ok it’s a very good problem I realise) is that I sold a lot more stuff than I expected to. This means a lot more rewards to deliver and a lot more books to print. My promise is that wherever you are in the world, you will recieve your reward by Christmas. Hopefully most of you will receive it in November.
If you want to know when to expect your stuff, here’s a list of specific rewards and expected delivery dates.
The fucking book - November
Get told to fuck off on the internet - October / November
The book with a fucking signature in it - November
Troll package - November/December
A signed book plus a fucking print - October/November
A signed book plus a different fucking print - October/November
Hate Mail - November/December
Dirty Queen - November/December
Fuck Christmas - December (of course)
Fuck Christmas - Deluxe edition - Christmas fucking day!
Fuck it list - October/November
A couple of bits of fucking paper with some words on - October/November
The T-shirt with my fucking face on it - October/November
Meet me for a pint in 5 years time - Do I really need to fucking answer this one?
For all the experiential rewards, I’m in touch with all of you individually and you all know what’s going on. Talking of those ones, we had another great ‘Getting shitfaced on a train’ last Saturday on the 12:05 to Bournemouth and back. Top banana.
Finally, for those of you who are interested in buying more books, they'll be available soon through a little webshop thing I’m making.
Thanks for your patience, fun things will be coming through your postboxes soon!