I wanted to share another story that a friend posted about David. It's a little long, but really really beautiful, and well damn worth the read. This is from Michael Erlewine from Michigan:
Please take a look and donate if you are able. David Fetzer was one of my very best friends and his talents should be known to many more.
It's been difficult for me to really write about him in any meaningful way even though we're coming up to three months after his unexpected passing. If I had to choose one adjective to describe David it would be brilliant. He was so incredibly brilliant.
His light shined with such brilliance into the darkest corners of the lives he touched -- and he made such an impact in so many lives. It's hard to sum up David to those that didn't know him but it's important that I try because to truly know me, you must understand how critical David was to shaping the person I am today.
The following is roughly what I said at his wake, to a large room full of his closest friends and family. I attempted then, as I do now, to explain how dear David is to me.
I was hesitant to come up and talk about David in front of all of you. I was going back and forth with the idea in my head while absentmindedly tearing off small portions of the tissues in my pocket and rolling them into little balls. When I realized what I was doing, I took it a sign, as an opening, as an affirmation.
One of the first times David and I hung out it was at a diner late at night. We were with a large group of people but David, my sister Michael Anne and I had fallen into a conversation off to the side which eventually shifted to talking about the obsessive compulsive tendencies we struggled with in our lives. David had this amazing ability to instantly find things in common even with complete strangers. It never seemed like small talk though. It was always an incredibly genuine conversation that was handled with such interest, care and humor that it made everyone feel open and at ease.
That night we had a lovely conversation that lasted an hour. We talked about all the little things that for some reason we just couldn't bear. I talked about how severe my OCD was at one point in my life and how much better it was now. By the end of the conversation we were congratulating ourselves and each other on our improvement, on how we were cured from such annoyances -- until we realized we had been tearing bits of napkins off on the table the entire conversation. As we gazed at the little balls piled on top of each other on either end of the table, it suddenly dawned on us that it was a deeper problem than we had anticipated.
I spent one of the best summers of my life with David, on a whirlwind tour through Michigan's music festivals and folk venues with my sister May and her partner Seth. It was during a particularly dark time in my life, I had kind of given up on life before I even lived it. I was anxious, apathetic, socially awkward and depressed. That summer changed how I saw the world and I found my place in it. David had a lot to do with that.
He had such an enthusiasm for life and such passion for so many types of art: music, film, food, brewing, writing, acting, and directing. He showed me what a full life was like and for the first time in a long time, the world felt big. It felt exciting and full of possibilities. I wanted to explore it with David at my side. That summer was the catalyst for who I am now, for all the things I am thankful for. That summer saved my life, or more accurately, gave me one worth living.
To brighten the mood (in a funeral home, which is tough) I decided to tell one of my favorite David stories:
One day David called me up and said "I have to tell you a story, and it's quite possibly the most embarrassing thing that's ever happened to me." I knew it must be a good story at this point because David had a knack for getting into (and hilariously out of) some pretty ridiculous situations.
"I was auditioning for a part and I totally bombed. The director made no sense! He was like 'Snowflakes, rainbows, go!' and I just tried my best to not look confused. What was I supposed to do with that? At any rate, I left and got in my car and was about to pull out of the lot when I realized I left my sunglasses inside. So at this point not only did I just completely bomb but I had to do the walk of shame back to the studio for my sunglasses. So I knocked on the door and they opened it a crack and looked at me like 'Jeeeeesus, what does this kid want now?' and I explained that I left my sunglasses inside and wondered if I could have a look around."
At this point in the story I laughed and said "Let me guess, there were on your head the whole time?" to which David replied, "No... I was USING them... I was SEEING through them!"
Apparently he had gotten so incredibly flustered from the terrible audition that thought he had lost sunglasses that were literally on his face.
I met David through my sister May and her partner Seth. Seth and David have been best friends since they were teenagers. May, David and I just clicked. May and I always said he was our long lost brother. We always called each other that, not bro or man or dude but brother (or brudder in David's case) and that is what he was to me. The brother I never had. He was my travel companion, my confidant, my mentor, my support, my compassionate critic, my best friend, my brother.
He was the first person I talked to about a certain Swedish girl I really liked at the time, he gave me some great advice. Micah Ling and I have been together for four and a half years now. I always wanted David to be my best man when the time came, but I was nervous to ask him because he lived in LA and always had a project (or several) he was working on. I didn't want to make him feel obligated to come, so I decided to wait until that day came and work up the guts then.
If all of this has taught me anything it's that I didn't even have to ask, because David was always just that.
My best man.