The eyes may be windows to the soul, but a mustache is the maître d' to oxygen. Mustache Monocles: your RSVP to a more civilized air.
Sirs and madams:
We are here to Kickstart your face.
What is a Mustache Monocle?
It's a mustache made of beautiful black walnut hardwood, attached to a length of copper chain and a fob. The fob goes around a button or tucks into a pocket. The mustache goes on your face.
What do you get in a package?
Three delightful mustaches, one of which is exclusive to the package. Three lengths of chain, and three fobs, to attach as you see fit.
Who makes them?
The fine folk of Geek Chic.
Why do you want our money?
Making Mustache Monocles on a limited budget undercuts their excellence-- and isn't as fun as involving the rest of you.
Over the past year, we brought our handcrafted Mustache Monocles with us on the road, personally introducing dignity to thousands. And it was good. But it wasn't... enough. And we ask you: doesn't everyone deserve dignity? Should something so magnificent be diminished over a simple matter of funding?
A peek at our roadshow.
We're here to bring dignity to the masses.
That list of rewards over there? That's a good start for how we'd like to do things. And we propose that you help dictate just how far we go. That is all. No pleas for help, no big eyes or sad kittens held over a bridge-- no threat to stop making them. Just an invitation to participate, and the knowledge that if we cannot continue to develop this amazing product, you will have let Dignity down. Down like a bag of big-eyed sad kittens whose only knowledge of human love was being gently held-- for thirty-five days-- over a bridge.
Let's see it, gentlemen.
Project photo by: IronHide
Video and content by: Geek Chic
And of course, our 25-million-dollar stretch goal.
We started bringing mustaches on the road with us to conventions about a year ago-- although they haven't been "out" so much as they've been dragged around with us. That's how we test the market for our smaller items. Recently, when Mustache Monocles became popular enough to sell out at shows, we realized we had demand we couldn't supply. (And that's just people in earshot of our convention booth.)
Geek Chic's day job is making hardwood gaming furniture-- a niche geek lifestyle investment. We're a small company, and we're totally at capacity with what we do. But we have this fun, exploding side project that is in demand, under twenty dollars, and for a far, far broader audience than our usual deal. We love them, but we just don't have the starting capital or man-hours to develop, improve components, package, advertise, and support this product the way it deserves.
It's an awesome problem. So, we're Kickstarting it. We want to clean it up, get it to retail, and let demand dictate how far we go.
None taken. Really. A gentleman relishes vigorous discourse.
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Pledge $1 or moreYou selected
DIGNITY SCHOLARSHIP • Your money goes towards the betterment of the world-- for all of those who cannot afford it themselves.Estimated delivery:
Pledge $20 or moreYou selected
MUSTACHE MONOCLE PACKAGE • 1 package of sir's choice (Class Act, Boom Town, or Artificial Intelli-Gents) + Exclusive Kickstarter Mustache. ALL PLEDGES ABOVE $20 RECEIVE THE EXCLUSIVE KICKSTARTER MUSTACHE. (Shipping: $2 Canada, $5 other international.)Estimated delivery:
Pledge $30 or moreYou selected
THE PHOTO BOMB • Our largest mustache, so you can compensate... for other people's photography. (Shipping: $2 Canada, $5 other international.)Estimated delivery:
Pledge $40 or moreYou selected
DOUBLE YOUR LEISURE • Two packages sent to your location. No need to pledge the $20 level twice. (Shipping: $4 Canada, $10 other international.)Estimated delivery:
Pledge $50 or moreYou selected
MUSTACHE TRIO • All 3 of our current packages: The Class Act, Boom Town, and Artificial Intelli-Gents sent to your estate the old fashioned way: we have a civil servant walk it over. (Shipping: $5 Canada, $10 other international.)Estimated delivery:
Pledge $85 or moreYou selected
THE BAKER'S DOZEN • Put your dough in good hands... with the Baker. 12 Classic mustaches and the exclusive Baker mustache in a perfectly fitted hardwood box. (Shipping: $5 Canada, $10 other international.)Estimated delivery:
Pledge $120 or moreYou selected
MUSTACHE OF THE MONTH CLUB • 1 unique mustache per month for 12 months. That's a full calendar year of dignity, delivered to your doorstep by an ambassador of the post. (SHIPPING: THIS LEVEL AND HIGHER, DOMESTIC ONLY.)Estimated delivery:
Pledge $200 or moreYou selected
THE WHOLE SHEBANG • All 3 packages plus the Photo Bomb and a Mustache of the Month Club membership.Estimated delivery:
Pledge $300 or moreYou selected
LIMITED EDITION WOOD BOXED SETS • Solid black walnut boxes, with inlayed lids and a divided, velvet-lined interior. What gentleman doesn't need a mustache humidor? + $20 Level Reward.Estimated delivery:
Pledge $500 or moreYou selected
CHAMPION OF DIGNITY • You get the trio of Mustache Monocle packages, the Photo Bomb, the Baker's Dozen, the limited edition boxed sets, MotM Club, and your name immortalized on the Champions of Dignity Monument at Geek Chic Headquarters. (What-- you don't have a public monument at your secret headquarters? Were you waiting for foot traffic?)Estimated delivery:
Pledge $650 or moreYou selected
LEVEL: REFINED • All the glory of the $500 level and a Kickstarter exclusive wooden mustache storage box. You could store jewelry in it, but let's be honest, all accessories will pale in comparison to the wealth of mustaches you've just acquired.Estimated delivery:
Pledge $1,500 or moreYou selected
0 backers Limited (7 left of 7)
LEVEL: ELEGANT • Every bit of the $500 level and an oil painting of you displayed on the Wall of Dignity. Immortalize yourself with a masterpiece work of art-- and also a painting.Estimated delivery:
Pledge $2,000 or moreYou selected
0 backers Limited (7 left of 7)
FURNITURE: MUSTACHE VALET • Dedicated to the man that needs more than a bowl to place his belongings. The Mustache Valet will hold your hat, coat, shoes, tie, pocket paraphernalia, and of course: your mustache. (For examples of our work, please visit http://GeekChicHQ.com) + $500 level.Estimated delivery:
Pledge $5,000 or moreYou selected
0 backers Limited (3 left of 3)
FURNITURE: MUSTACHE VANITY • They call it vanity, we call it self respect. This Geek Chic work of furniture is the superlative piece for the connoisseur of class. More details to come as we bring our design to life! (To see other furniture we have made, please visit http://GeekChicHQ.com.)Estimated delivery:
Pledge $8,000 or moreYou selected
0 backers Limited (3 left of 3)
ARCHITECT OF DIGNITY • (anywhere in the world) Our crack team of mustache couturiers will be at your disposal to design three unique mustaches for a custom Mustache Monocle Package. Theme it for your business! Includes custom cover art. (Have you seen the script on each envelope? It differs from set to set, adapting to each package's theme.) Be the envy of lesser men... which will be all them. + 50 packages for your personal use and $500 level rewards.Estimated delivery:
Pledge $10,000 or moreYou selected
0 backers Limited (1 left of 1)
PERSONAL DIGNITY CONSULTANT • Robert Jasper Gifford III, the dapper man himself, will pay you a visit for a personal dignity makeover and consultation. Surprised that you can buy a thing like that? (You can't. We're telling him you're selling him an island.) Just look at that exquisite attire. Perhaps sir would like a shopping excursion? A custom piece of furniture-- walnut, cherry or maple? We're willing to get creative.Estimated delivery:
- (34 days)