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I've written a comedic book detailing my medical trauma. This will fund the printing and lengthen the distribution of my banana.
The Kickstarter was a success and now you can buy on Amazon at http://amzn.to/2p9bPY5
The Kickstarter was a success and now you can buy on Amazon at http://amzn.to/2p9bPY5
174 backers pledged $8,450 to help bring this project to life.

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Broken Bananah: Comedy, Life, and Sex ...Without a Penis

$8,450

174

Have you ever been hospitalized after sex?
Can you read?

If you answered YES to at least one of those questions, Broken Bananah would be a great project for you to support. 

Why? Well, this is a coming of age tale about the time I tore two muscles in my beloved rooster and severed my urethra. This is the funny/not-so-funny story of the accident, the recovery, and all the pain, love, and philosophy in between. A score of people helped me pee, including my mother, as I shuffled around New York City tethered to a urination tube for a month. It’s a story about perspective through anecdotes like cross-dressing Halloween costumes, a teenage dowry, and a copious amount of phallic references. 

Self-publishing this "intimate" story is extremely daunting. After a lifetime of writing for magazines, newspapers, blogs, and scripts, I'm looking for a community to grow this book with that can laugh at life's pains with me.


The "accident" happened a little over three years ago, and I worked on it part time for a year before leaving my job last May to finish it. Supporting the project will guarantee laughter, cringing, and a newfound precaution in the bedroom. 

The first two pages...
The first two pages...

Why me?

I ask myself that all the time. Ultimately, I possess the powerful combo of really bad luck and experienced storytelling. Since I was 13, I've been writing and performing sketch/improv comedy, including a local show I produced in Seattle for 3 years. Even though this is my first full book, it has taken me years of constantly creating across film, radio, and print to find the voice I write in (...mine?). In addition to the resume, my brain is hardwired for That's What She Said Jokes... also since I was 13.

Headed to the airport to my best friend's wedding, catheter in. I was the best man...
Headed to the airport to my best friend's wedding, catheter in. I was the best man...

Prizes (that need explaining)

Naughty Banana Photo Shoot
I started as a photographer, doing engagement shoot for disgruntled couples on craigslist looking for free pictures. I've since sharpened that skill, and I will take you out for a naughty banana photo shoot in NYC. 

Live Reading, Q&A
I'll organize an event at a local bookstore and we'll do a reading, a Q&A, and laugh a shit ton. You can invite friends, or not. We could do at another place if you'd like. "We can do it anywhere." -112

Banana Party I bring the music and the bar, you bring everyone and mandate a banana theme. We do a little comedy, a little reading, and then we party. Everyone will be jealous of your Instagram story. 

B-Swag.
B-Swag.

Banana Hunt Pub Crawl The rules of the Banana Hunt are simple. You invite 24 friends who like fun to a central location. I put you in teams of 3 and give you a list of local bars in the city. I put on a banana suit and go to one of those bars. Teams go to each bar until they find the banana bar. Once they find the bar where I (the banana) am... the tab is covered.  

Last page being formatted in InDesign.
Last page being formatted in InDesign.

What's left?

- Final line edit read through before print.
- Book layout. Lining up people and prices to finish different formats. 
- Paperback paper, binding selection.
- Launch press kit
- Studio booking for audio version

Practicing for the audiobook when I was a radio DJ in 2007.
Practicing for the audiobook when I was a radio DJ in 2007.

 

Risks and challenges

The biggest challenge of self publishing is not having the support of a company to organize and execute.

A book launch means a design and layout that's ready for printing. It means that I have to have paper choice, font, size, spacing, and color correction lined up to send to a printing press (also, finding the printing press). Then, I need an entirely separate set of parameters for digital books. Each of these are huge bumps in the road where the work itself can suffer.

As a former video producer at NBC and Red Bull, I've been overcoming problems in the field my whole career. My method to is spend triple the time in preparing, and that's what I've been doing with the book. I have been working hard to prepare for a launch from all parts. For example, the printing press is located in Sacramento, and I have been working with them to make sure everything is ready and efficient for release.

The risk is that, if this doesn't get funded, I won't be able to give the book a first run print that's necessary for any sort of success. I've put every part of me, quite literally, into this book, and I want to continue to write the other books I have waiting in my brain.

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  1. Select this reward

    Pledge $10 or more About $10

    E-Book + Updates

    Digital banana to your digital device and some MF updates.

    Includes:
    • E-Book
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    Signed Paperback +

    Real deal, banana in hand book. Authentic signature to prove you're a patron of the arts.

    Includes:
    • Paperback Book
    • E-Book
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    Pledge $25 or more About $25

    Audiobook +

    Reading's tough, put the banana in your ears... all voiced by me! Did you know I used to be a radio DJ? I'm a professional.

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    • E-Book
    • Paperback Book
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    Pledge $50 or more About $50

    Compliment Shower +

    Holy shit. I'll google you on a spiritual level, then make a video complimenting you in ways that aren't even fair. I'll send it to you, or post it on your wall and pretend like it wasn't planned.

    Includes:
    • Audiobook
    • E-Book
    • Paperback Book
    • Compliment Shower
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  5. Select this reward

    Pledge $75 or more About $75

    Mystery Banana +

    Get a customized banana surprise from my collection of nana memorabilia. It will be unique, make you laugh, and have utility. GARE-RON-TEED!

    Includes:
    • Audiobook
    • E-Book
    • Compliment Shower
    • Paperback Book
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    Pledge $100 or more About $100

    Naughty Banana Photoshoot in NYC

    You, me, banana suit. We do a photoshoot that is guaranteed to get you enough likes to make your #top9. I have a big lens and yes I am compensating. Must be in NYC, flight not included.

    Includes:
    • Audiobook
    • E-Book
    • Compliment Shower
    • Paperback Book
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    Reward no longer available 10 backers
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    Pledge $150 or more About $150

    Framed Poster +

    Signed and framed poster of cover art. I can leave the text off so it looks like a Warhol. People will recognize you as an art collector.

    Includes:
    • Audiobook
    • Compliment Shower
    • E-Book
    • Paperback Book
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    Reward no longer available 5 backers
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    Pledge $500 or more About $500

    Q&A/Book Reading in Your Town!

    I come to your city and set up a book reading in a local bookshop by you. The most fun you can have in a bookshop without taking your pants off.

    Includes:
    • Audiobook
    • E-Book
    • Compliment Shower
    • Paperback Book
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    Pledge $1,500 or more About $1,500

    Banana House Party!

    I throw a full blown banana themed dance party at your house. You provide the space and the guest list, and I provide everything else.

    Includes:
    • Audiobook
    • Paperback Book
    • Compliment Shower
    • E-Book
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    Pledge $3,000 or more About $3,000

    Banana Pub Crawl...

    Oh boy. Here's how this works. I come to your city and create a list of bars. You invite thirty of of your friends and divide them into teams of three. One banana suit, 25 of your closest friends, one epic pub crawl around your city to find the banana. This can only happen once for everyone's safety.

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Funding period

- (30 days)