"I lie awake; I am like a lonely sparrow on the housetop." (Psalm 102:7)
I want to write a book that allows me to share in the loneliness of
One of the few things that I am absolutely certain of in my
life is that I do not possess the desire or skill to be a salesman. Thus, you
will have to forgive my inability to sell my wares in an upbeat and persuasive
manor. So, if you would be so kind, please allow me to pitch my idea (and open
my heart to you) as boldly as I know how.
First, let me be clear, I do not plan on providing to the world another book
that will necessarily lift someone out of a low mental state, per se. I am not writing a self-help book, because I do not desire to write
one, nor am I qualified to. I am not an expert or specialist in the sciences (of any kind), and I
beleive that a specialist in the sciences, whether a psychologist or psychiatrist,
is better suited for providing mental health care. Notwithstanding the fact that I am not an
expert or specialist in the sciences, I am an expert of a different variety; I
consider myself an expert on loneliness. "How so?" you may ask. Allow
me to make a comparison in order to explain.
A biologist may study a lion in order to learn more about the nature of a lion,
but he will never fully know what the nature of a lion is really like, and what motivates him,
unless he has the nature of a lion and becomes a lion himself. (And we all know
that a scientist cannot become a lion.) I am like a lion; I am a lion of deep
loneliness. While the scientist may glean much knowledge in his study of
loneliness he will never know as much as he could know about deep loneliness
until he is actually deeply lonely himself. I have been deeply lonely the
majority of my life, and yet, I still have hope through it all. It is this feeling of loneliness, and the awareness of hope that yet remains within me that I long to share with others.
While I could continue with a plea for you to assist me with my endeavor to write this book, I'll simply end my explanation of what I am working on by sharing with you an excerpt from the introduction of the book, Sparrow on the Housetop, and hope that through this you get a clearer sense of what I am trying to do and the insight that I have into this real life issue.
"You can have hundreds (or thousands, or even millions)
of followers and friends online, or you can go to gatherings where you are
surrounded by scores of people, but still feel all alone. You can be married
for years, have a dozen children and numerous grandchildren, but still feel all
alone. You can have a life filled with professional meetings and engagements
where you're constantly coming into contact with other people, but still feel
"Are you not alone, but feel all alone? Do not worry.
You are not alone in your feeling of aloneness. I am here to tell you that I
feel this way often. I'm married, I have several children, I have a number of
people that I am connected to online, and I have a constant barrage of meetings
and engagements between work and social activities. Nonetheless, I feel alone
more often than not. And I do not mean that I have passing feelings of
loneliness. I get deep feelings of loneliness. I sometimes feel as though I am
the only person on the face of the planet.
"So what lifts me out of these deep places? Well,
first, if you never feel this way, the answer is not for you. However, if you
do feel this way from time to time, and you find yourself there in the future,
allow me to share in your loneliness as we search for the truth about that
which plagues us. You will find herein that, truly, you are not alone."
Risks and challenges
Carpal tunnel syndrome, for one thing. But I plan on using a keyboard rest for my wrists while I type. Other than that, I'm not sure that there will be too many challenges for me. I already have the thesis, outline and full introduction for the book. All that I need to do now is fill in the blanks, and I can do that well. If there are major challenges that do arise I will document them and share them with my supporters as we go along.
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