Share this project


Share this project

The greatest work IN English literature, now in the greatest format OF English literature: a chooseable-path adventure!
The greatest work IN English literature, now in the greatest format OF English literature: a chooseable-path adventure!
The greatest work IN English literature, now in the greatest format OF English literature: a chooseable-path adventure!
15,352 backers pledged $580,905 to help bring this project to life.

EIGHT DAYS LEFT: more story, more artists unlocked, more choices you now must make!


We've just broken $325k, which means another reward tier, which means Five Awesome Artists have appeared! Each of them will doing an illustration for the book, and I am SO EXCITED:

AAAH THIS BOOK IS GOING TO BE SO GOOD, YOU GUYS. I'm super thrilled to get to work with all these amazing people! Also the School Library Journal did a story on us which is also awesome. So in conclusion: everything is awesome!

The next stretch goal is at $350k. Thank you for sharing with everyone: you are tied for first place on my list of "Best People Ever".

Storywise, we'd finally come up with a book we could use to trick Claudius into revealing himself as a stone-cold murderer. I'd asked you to either be the best person you could be yesterday or eat sand, and while a lot of you decided to be awesome, there was some sand that got consumed. But there's always tomorrow, right? ANYWAY LET US PROCEED AS OPHELIA:

Give the book to the king

First thing in the morning, you show up to the Royal Court. Hamlet's got the book, so all you need to do is observe. You look out at the room and see that everyone's here: the king and queen, your dad, Hamlet's weird friends Rosencrantz and Guildenstern and Horatio, a bunch of people you've never met - the whole gang! As you walk into the room, you notice Hamlet talking to Horatio. He's asking him to also keep an eye on Claudius as he reads the story. Couldn't hurt.

Alright. There's nothing left to do. It's go time! Hopefully Hamlet realizes that too!

It turns out he does. "Hey Claudius!" Hamlet says, brandishing his copy of Gonzago. "Why don't you read THIS book today?"

"I certainly don't see why not," Claudius says, and Hamlet passes him the book. Hamlet seems to hesitate on where to go next, but settles on standing behind the king so he can see what he's reading.

As Claudius begins to read, you become really intent on what's happening. In fact, you're staring at Claudius and listening so insanely intensely that you almost feel like you've become the man himself!

Here are your two specially-named-just-for-you options: vote for which path you want to take in the comments! Bonus points for doing so rhyming couplets, sonnets, free verse and epic narrative poetry:

OPTION CHRISTINA: Continue staring at Claudius so hard that you become Claudius
OPTION BRITNEY: Keep being Ophelia, because watching someone else read a book is definitely way more fun than actually reading it


Only backers can post comments. Log In
    1. Missing avatar

      Randal Cooper on

      While a poisoned ear, might bring good cheer, if the poison's
      Funky Cold Medina,
      Being Claudius, shouldn't raise a fuss, so I'm saying

    2. Missing avatar

      Austin on

      Hit me,
      With me,

    3. Morgan Payne on

      --Not a Sestina, Nearly a Sonnet--
      This poem is quite nearly a sonnet,
      You might call it strict but you needn’t moan.
      Tuck this beneath your tight little bonnet:
      the sestina’s the worst English form known!

      A sestina’s form is the strictest kind,
      Some will argue that you can’t even rhyme!
      To end each line will only bore you blind--
      you’ll soon discover you’re wasting your time.

      Look at this sonnet’s simple example.
      (heed not this poem’s loosest iambic,
      be as it may that trochees are quite ample)
      Be full of virtue, and don’t be a dick,

      And please never write any sestina
      Even concerning a lass like Christina.

    4. Andreas Linder on

      Reading stuff yourself is too mainstream.

    5. Missing avatar

      Dan Fuchs on

      Option Christina is the way to go
      because surrealism is awesome, you know.

    6. Luke Bean on

      Say it wit me:
      Option Britney

    7. Nitin Malik on

      is pristina

    8. Missing avatar

      maya lowy on

      Toward magical realism I just have to lean-a,
      Meaning a vote for telepathic Christina

    9. Missing avatar

      KikahaJones on


      (I must remain true to Ophelia!)

    10. Mary-Ann Wyatt on

      Come now little chick pea
      You know you want to choose OPTION BRITNEY

    11. Tasha Rivera on

      Uhhhh... Britney, I suppose.

    12. Missing avatar

      Andrew O on

      As much as I appreciate this story book
      I would rather read this part in my own nook
      So get ready to watch Claudius with some sweat tea
      And lets all vote Britney

    13. Missing avatar

      Andrea Burgess on

      Amazing mind-meld Christina option, please.

    14. Hannah Frank on

      Christina's the obvious choice.
      Yes go with the judge on The Voice!
      Claudius could be fun,
      SO just get it done.
      Reveal yourself, we'll rejoice!

    15. Missing avatar

      Dan Blackmore on

      i'm gonna punch you in the kitney
      if you don't chose britney

    16. Alison Schommer on

      option britney all the way!!

    17. Missing avatar

      Signe Birch Jensen on

      The growing of grass
      Rather dull
      The drying of paint
      Ever so boring
      The watching of others reading
      RAD TIMES, BITCHES!!!!!!!!!!!!

    18. Missing avatar

      Anthony Robusto on

      WE NEED TO BECOME CLAUDIUS IF ONLY TO PROVE THAT WE CAN! ...Sorry about that. I got excited. I vote Christina.

    19. Missing avatar

      CPE Gaebler on

      I want to see the book so bad! Christina!

    20. Missing avatar

      Colleen on

      I sit and ponder
      which lady name to choose.
      I choose Christina!

    21. Missing avatar

      Jessica Hopkins on

      This year we lost Ephron, Rivera, and Whitney
      But we still have Ophelia! Better pick BRITNEY.

    22. VooDoo on

      I must elect my given name,
      In the hopes of changing reference frame.
      Let us transmute our state of mind,
      Inside Claudius ourselves to find.

    23. Timmo Warner on

      Christina, please.

    24. Missing avatar

      Risa on

      I'm not sure either one will quite fit me,
      but loving Ophelia means Britney.

    25. Renee on

      No bonus points I'm sad to say
      I'm just not so poetic today

    26. Unclever title on

      I SHAKE my fist at your SPEARS for this entire era!
      My vote is that we choose CHRISTINA Aguilera.

    27. richlayers on

      Christina for sure.

    28. Missing avatar

      Eliza on

      I stare at him; he stares into the book.
      His mind yawns ope; I breathe, prepare to dive
      Into that pit - but leap before you look
      Will lead, Gonzago-like, to being not alive.
      Polonius, father mine, would surely say,
      “If into the abyss you stare, it stares
      back into you” – my unchecked course I stay,
      consid’ring what I might do unawares:
      for do I want the king to lurk and leer
      to know my thoughts and deeds both done and planned,
      or worser yet, to see us meet in fear
      the ghost, make out, conspire to have him damned?

      Though Tina beckons, I will BRITNEY stay –
      Not die a king, but live another day.

    29. Missing avatar

      DaPatman on

      OPTION CHRISTINA, since as Zeke pointed out earlier, this would mean Ophelia has astral projection powers, and since I can't live in a world where this is possible, at least I can read about such a world.