Achievement unlocked: THIS IS ACTUALLY HAPPENING.
AHHHH WE REACHED OUR FUNDING GOAL IN JUST THREE AND A HALF HOURS. Thank you SO MUCH - because of you, this book is going to happen!! And it's just going to KEEP HAPPENING and KEEP GETTING MORE AMAZING because of how awesome all of you are being.
I just want to keep saying "thank you" - I'm humbled and thrilled and super excited all at once. I call this new emotion, "exrillbled"! I may be renaming it in the future. ANYWAY! You guys are the best ever in time!!
As thanks, I've uploaded an illustration for the book by that came in too late for the video but JUST IN TIME for me to share it with you right now! It's by Chris Hastings.
SPOILER ALERT: THERE ARE G-G-G-GHOSTS IN THIS BOOK.
And hey, since this book is definitely going to be a thing (I said it before but I'm gonna say it again: thank you all SO MUCH), let's start reading it together! This is the pre-edited version of course, so things might change, but at least you'll be able to look back on this in a few months and say "Huh, he caught that misplaced comma after all. Sweeeet."
EVERYONE VOTE ON WHAT YOU WANT THE NEXT CHOICE TO BE IN THE COMMENTS, AND I'LL POST A NEW PAGE EVERY $5K:
William Shakespeare (1564 AD - whenever he died) was well known for borrowing from existing literature when writing his plays. Romeo and Juliet is pretty much lifted entirely from Arthur Brooke's poem "The Tragical History of Romeus and Juliet": dude didn't even change the names. And, as recent Shakespeare scholarship has recently established, the famed play "William Shakespeare Presents: Hamlet!" was lifted wholesale from the volume you are about to enjoy, "To Be Or Not To Be".
"To Be Or Not To Be" is both the earliest recorded example of the "books as game" genre, as well as the first instance ever in the then-newish English language that was kicking around of an adventure being chosen by YOU, the reader.
We've taken the liberty of marking with tiny Yorick skulls the choices Shakespeare himself made when he plagiarized this book back in olden times. They’re there in case you wish you put yourself in Shakespeare's shoes, reading this book as he did, stealing plot elements wholesale and classing up the language as he/you went/go. However, this is not the only way to read this book! Feel free to explore your other options, as each time you read this book you can go on a different adventure, assuming you don't read the book 53,000,000 times, at which point the adventures will start to repeat and they'll probably seem pretty familiar long before that anyway.
Now, take yourself back to History, when ghosts walked the Earth and nobody knew dinosaurs were ever even a thing. Steel yourself to experience the magic of Shakespeare as it was meant to be experienced: in a non-deterministic narrative structure where you end up thinking maybe you made a wrong decision so you mark the pages you were just on so you can go back and make a different choice if you die for some dumb reason.
To be, or not to be: that is the adventure.
Noted Shakespeare Scholar / Enthusiast
CHOICE ONE: Choose your character!
CHOICE TWO: Man, what if I just read the acknowledgements instead
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ONE FUTURE BOOK, PLEASE: You'll get a DRM-free digital copy of To Be Or Not To Be as soon as it's completed, that will last as long as we've got electricity and computers. This is the fastest and cheapest way to get the book!Estimated delivery:
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ONE PHYSICAL AND FUTURE BOOK, PLEASE: You'll get a SIGNED paperback copy of To Be Or Not To Be AND a digital copy. For non-US donors, please donate at least $30 total to accommodate shipping.Estimated delivery:Add $10 USD to ship outside the US
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TOTALLY SWEET: The physical and future book (signed book and digital copy!) plus some Kickstarter-only temporary tattoos! One is of T-Rex saying "Sup?" and the other is of Utahraptor saying "WHATEVER". Don't you want these on your skin? Probably?? For non-US donors, please donate at least $35 total to accommodate shipping.Estimated delivery:Add $10 USD to ship outside the US
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AMAZINGLY RAD: You'll get a SIGNED limited edition hardcover copy of To Be Or Not TO Be AND a digital copy. For non-US donors, please donate at least $60 total to accommodate shipping.Estimated delivery:Add $10 USD to ship outside the US
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SUPER AMAZINGLY RAD: Everything in AMAZINGLY RAD (signed hardcover book and digital copy) plus some Kickstarter-only temporary tattoos! One is of T-Rex saying "Sup?" and the other is of Utahraptor saying "WHATEVER". Don't you want these on your skin too? Probably you do?? For non-US donors, please donate at least $65 total to accommodate shipping.Estimated delivery:Add $10 USD to ship outside the US
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IS IT ALLOWED TO READ ONE BOOK MORE THAN ONCE, WHAT IF IT'S NOT: 3 paperback copies of the book, signed. Please give at least $15 extra in shipping for non-US orders.Estimated delivery:Add $15 USD to ship outside the US
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I WANT TO PUT THINGS ON MY BODY AND WALLS: Everything in the "TOTALLY SWEET" pack (signed book, digital copy, rad tats) AND a giant, gorgeous poster featuring an annotated flowchart for the entire book. You'll be able to go through the story just by staring at your wall. That's what living is all about, my friend.Estimated delivery:Add $15 USD to ship outside the US
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BEST BUDS FOREVER: a signed paperback copy of To Be Or Not To Be, PLUS a signed hardcover version too. And you get all the goodies in "SUPER AMAZINGLY RAD" tier twice! That means two bookmarks, two copies of the prequel, twice the tattoos, and so on. I hope fighting over who gets the hardcover version will not destroy your friendship :( Add $15 to ship outside the US.Estimated delivery:Add $15 USD to ship outside the US
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SUPER I WANT TO PUT THINGS ON MY BODY AND WALLS: Like I WANT TO PUT THINGS ON MY BODY AND WALLS (book + poster + rad tats + digital copy), but with a hardcover copy of the book instead. International donors please donate at least $100 total to accommodate shipping.Estimated delivery:Add $10 USD to ship outside the US
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GIANT ADVENTURES, GIANT POSTERS: Everything in SUPER I WANT TO PUT THINGS ON MY BODY AND WALLS (hardcover book, rad tats, digital copy, poster) but with the poster printed both regular (large) sized and TREMENDOUS-SIZED. You'll get 4 posters that combine, Voltron-style, to form a poster that is larger than your body in every dimension except thickness. International donors please add at least $15 to accommodate shipping.Estimated delivery:Add $15 USD to ship outside the US
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WHAT ABOUT ME THOUGH: Everything in the Super I Want To Put Things On My Body And Walls pack (hardcover book + poster + rad tats + digital copy), PLUS I'll write and sign and sketch a dinosaur in a separate pamphlet book containing a 100% all-new gamebook adventure starring YOU. Just tell me a bit about yourself and what sort of adventure you'd like to go on! You are now a patron of the arts with a custom minibook written about your wacky times! Put that on your epitaph, baby.Estimated delivery:
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PATRON OF THE FRIGGIN' ARTS: Everything in the Super I Want To Put Things On My Body And Walls pack (hardcover book + poster + rad tats + digital copy), PLUS I'll write a Dinosaur Comic on the subject of your choosing that will appear on the site. Just don't make it a terrible subject ("Sam eats poops, I saw it, I was there") and we'll be good. You will have the power to create an actual comic on any topic you choose. This will make you a literal patron of the arts. This is amazing. Also it would make a nice present for someone I'm pretty sure.Estimated delivery:
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ULTIMATE CHAMPION IN ALL POSSIBLE TIMELINES: Everything in the WHAT ABOUT ME THOUGH reward level, plus I'll paint a painting of T-Rex that you'll get to have in your house. This is a thing you can make happen. NOTE: I am not a very good painter is the thing. Thank you for supporting the book and in exchange I will make you the best painting I can but let's both go into this with our eyes open.Estimated delivery:
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ULTIMATE CHAMPION IN ALL POSSIBLE TIMELINES 2000: Everything in "ULTIMATE CHAMPION IN ALL POSSIBLE TIMELINES", plus your painting will be on a sexagonal canvas which makes it better and more valuable, plus you and I will have a nice conversation on the phone during where I'll ask you what T-Rex should be doing in the painting, and then we'll just talk about our feelings, during which time you will be given SEVERAL opportunities to choose where the conversation goes next.Estimated delivery:
- (30 days)