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$5,022 pledged of $10,000 goal
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$5,022 pledged of $10,000 goal
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About this project

What parent hasn't wanted a kid-friendly way to introduce their child to the sanity-bending horrors of Cthulhu and the other works of author H.P. Lovecraft? 

https://www.facebook.com/professorgrownup/

http://www.professorgrownup.com

This project is a full length CD of catchy children's songs about the Lovecraftian mythos, often overlaid with kid-centric moral lessons (like making friends, trying new foods, or the joy of reading) but brimming with references only parents will get. The music itself ranges from lullabies ("Goodnight, Cthulhu"), to surf-rock ("The Color Out Of Space") to mariachi ("Mi Go, My Amigo") and will be recorded with some of the best musicians Colorado has to offer. 

The album will be tracked and mixed at Evergroove Studio in the forests outside of Evergreen, Colorado. VERY ROUGH vocal and guitar demos have been recorded, so it's just a matter of bringing in the string quartet, trumpet-players, bass, drums and sousaphone necessary to realize the musical vision of this project. 

Bonus Songs

In addition to the 11 songs about the works of H.P. Lovecraft, this project will also include 3 bonus songs about the works of Lovecraft's pulp writing buddy Robert E. Howard, most famous for the character of Conan the Barbarian. The three songs, based around the Conan short stories (not the movies) include the tunes "B is for Barbarian," "Never Trust A Wizard" and "He Did It Anyway" which impart the same kid-friendly life lessons as the Lovecraftian material. 

About The Songs  

Again, these are just samples of the rough demo versions of the songs and are in no way representative of the final product. When the album is funded, it's going to be packed with the most talented studio musicians Colorado has to offer.

The song order on the album hasn't been finalized, but the 11 songs chosen for the album are as follows.

  • Just Say Fhtagn! A song co-written with Specialists webcomic writer Shawn Gustafson, this cheerful tune gives kids an alternative to swearing. 
  • We Don't Eat Our Friends. No matter how delicious they appear and no matter how monstrous our appetites, it's really never okay to consume our friends, and this is a song about that.
  • Secret Book Club. A low-key ditty encouraging kids to accumulate brainpower through reading, while also mentioning a number of famous fictional tomes referenced in Lovecraft's work. 
  • Lovecraft Bath. A catchy song about getting clean in the bathtub, and also non-Euclidean math thanks to the wonders of rhyme.
  • Mi Go, My Amigo. A mariachi song about how cool it is to have friends who are different from you. References flying fungi from Yuggoth.
  • The Reanimation Song. A song about Dr. Herbert West, how not everyone appreciates his hobby, and how that's okay. Lets kids know that they can have a passion for things different from their peers.
  • Innsmouth Is My Kind Of Town. A silly tune about the seaside town where the Deep Ones congregate. The music begins to sound like it's going deeper underwater as the song continues. 
  • The Necronomnomnomnomnomicon. This one encourages kids to try new foods that they may be unfamiliar with. 
  • The Color Out Of Space. The surf-rock story of a color that was bullied by the other shades and decided to take a vacation on earth to make some new friends. 
  • Hey Hastur. A rock duet about how it's not okay to make fun of peoples' names, especially not the elder god Hastur.
  • Goodnight, Cthulhu. A quiet lullabye about dread Cthulhu, urging him (and your child) to go back to sleep and stay that way. 

 

About The Artist

Cameron Hays (aka Professor Grownup) was the bass player and songwriter for a number of bands of varying success over the last 20 years. His former music project Choke The Word became the first Colorado band to use Kickstarter to fund an album, and later received a Westword Music Showcase Award. He's also a professional educator who has worked with infants through graduate students at various times in his career. He is currently completing his dissertation for a PhD in Curriculum & Instruction and he feels he's too old to play in bands anymore, so the Professor Grownup pseudonym isn't arbitrary. 

In recent years, Cameron has developed a rare medical condition that largely prevents him from playing instruments, so songwriting, composing, and now singing have become his musical outlet.

Cameron started working with Brad Smalling at Evergroove Studio when recording the Choke The Word CD, and has partnered with him for a number of other projects (including the orchestral techno-industrial project Violent Science and the ongoing "heist music" project The Mile Heist Club). 

 

About The Studio

Nestled in the foothills of Denver, Evergroove is Colorado’s first and best affordable, solar-powered, recording studio. They offer audio recording, mixing, & mastering for most genres and have worked with local, touring, & national artists. 

 

Risks and challenges

The 11 songs for the album are already written. In fact, the acoustic guitars and vocals have already been recorded. However, the album won't be released until we think it's ready, and that means studio musicians. The funds from this Kickstarter will go to paying for these musicians to add their flavor to the songs and make them truly sing. That said, musicians can be unpredictable, and scheduling may run into some snags, which would delay the album. We fully anticipate being able to release the album (and the other rewards like t-shirts and songbooks) in a timely fashion, and we'll keep you in the loop if things go off the rails.

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  1. Select this reward

    Pledge $5 or more About $5

    Just Give Me The Music, Professor!

    Digital download of the 11 tracks on the album.

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    I'm Oldschool, I Want A Hard Copy!

    Digital download of the 11 tracks on the album, plus a copy of the actual CD.

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    Sweet, I'm Set For Birthday Presents!

    You get the digital download, and three copies of the CD to give away to friends.

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    I'm Going To Want to Sing Along!

    The digital download, the CD, and a song book that doubles as a coloring book!

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    I Want To Wear My Music Too!

    The digital download, the CD, the coloring book/songbook, and a Professor Grownup T-shirt or Onesie!

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    Pledge $30 or more About $30

    I'm Even More Set For Birthday Presents!

    You get the digital download, three copies of the CD and three copies of the songbook / coloring book to give away to friends.

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    Pledge $35 or more About $35

    Personal Message!

    All the stuff from the lower tiers, plus thanks in the liner notes and a personalized dedication on the CD signed by Professor Grownup.

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    Pledge $100 or more About $100

    I Want To Be A Part Of This!

    The digital download, the CD, the coloring book/songbook, the t-shirt or onesie, and we'll walk you through how your child (or yourself) can contribute backing vocal parts for the actual album. This also means you can hear the (unfinished) songs before anyone else.

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    Pledge $125 or more About $125

    Tell Me A Story, Too!

    The digital download, the CD, the coloring book/songbook, the t-shirt or onesie, the option for your child to contribute backing vocals, AND Professor Grownup will film a video of him reading your child's favorite children's book (edited with pictures from the book and some music and sound effects).

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    Pledge $200 or more About $200

    Immortalized In Song!

    You get the digital download, the CD, the songbook/coloring book, the t-shirt or onesie, the opportunity to contribute if you like. Additionally, one of the names used in the song "We Don't Eat Our Friends" will be changed to your child's name!

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    Pledge $1,000 or more About $1,000

    Hey Professor, Sing About _____!

    Your favorite element of the Mythos not currently on the album? Collaborate with Professor Grownup to write it and add it to collection! You also get the digital download, the CD, the songbook/coloring book, and the t-shirt or onesie.

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    I Want to Produce This Thing!

    You get all the lesser tiers (including the co-authoring one) and your name will be right up at the top of the credits for the album as an Executive Producer

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    Pledge $5,000 or more About $5,000

    I Want to Sing a Duet

    The download, the CD, the t-shirt, the songbook/coloring book, the personalized dedication, and you sing the part of Hastur in the song, "Hey Hastur." You need to be able to make it to our studio in Evergreen, CO in order to ensure recording quality.

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Funding period

- (30 days)