You like awkward Sears photoshoots? How about one with Passalacqua? If you're out of state, we'll hit the shoot with a stand-in, cut out his/her face and put YOURS there instead! Frame it up real nice, send it to your door, along with a few wallet-sized ones.
A personalized song, from us to you. Send us a few facts about yourself (or a loved one), we'll pen a song, record it over an exclusive instrumental, and send you a copy of it. Personalized artwork and all!
WE'RE COMING TO YOUR HOUSE AND COOKING YOU DINNER! We're good cooks, so don't fret. If you're vegan/vegetarian/have any allergies, do let us know. If you're, say, in the UK and we can't physically visit you, we'll send you an HD video of the entire dinner, charming banter and all!