And now for the stretch goals;
At $2,200: Interior Art Work Selected Stories (As many as I can pull off) will get a full page Art work to lead them off.
At $3,300: Hard Cover edition. We will produce a one-time limited edition hard cover of the anthology. Each contributor will get one on top of the paperback edition. Anyone pledging at the right level will get one and a limited number will be sold to the same pool of people (100 copy limit)
At $4,400: Every contributor gets 1 cent a word payment I want to take care of my authors and pay them an upfront rate for their stories. (They will be getting royalties and contributors copies now.)
At $5,500: Every contributor gets 2 cents a word payment
At $6,600: Every contributor gets 3 cents a word payment
And So on....
Edited by Giovanni Valentino
Isabel Sterling - Day Al-Mohamed - Brenda Anderson - Jason Bougger - Gavin Cameron - A.B. Rinklin - Dan Doerflein - John H. Dromey - Christine Edwards - Jaimie M. Engle - Eric James Spannerman - Steve Esling - Laura Thurston - Ronald Friedman - Jay Fuller - Danielle Gales - Steven Grassie - Cathy Greco - James E. Guin - Shari L Klase - Felicia Lee Lance Manion - Daniel McPherson - Jez Patterson - M. Kelly Peach Clay Sheldon - Chuck Rothman - Josh Strnad - Giovanni Valentino - Adam Millard - Aaron Austin
Cover Art by Aimee Maroney
Check out a preview of one of these stories here
(the preview will change daily)
Specs of the print edition.
- 6 by 9 trade paperback
- 320 pages.
- 32 crazy and funny stories.
Here is a list of some of the stories in Alternate Hilarities.
Attack of Ye Olde Zombies by Cathy Greco
And, thus, the world ends… not with a bang… not with a whimper… but with the mournful cry of an off-key bagpipe playing an undead reel, and the sad, sad sight of deflated codpieces never to be filled.
1-800-CALL-GOD by Chuck Rothman
Help is just a phone call away...
Adrift by Dan Doerflein
In life, he sailed the high seas with his pirate crew. All he wanted in death was to sail the seas again. Before he can escape his situation and obtain the afterlife he dreamed of, he must first defeat a pirate’s worst enemy: a bureaucrat.
The Princess and the Witch by Isabel Sterling
Marisa only wanted one thing for Halloween: the ancient magic she possessed in a past life. She’d prepared for this ritual for years, and nothing could get in her way. Except, perhaps, her sorority girl roommate.
The Muse and the Psychiatrist by M. Kelly Peach
She was divinely beautiful, a daughter of Zeus with a serious problem. She needed a qualified and caring psychiatrist, with talent and experience, to help her. Little did she know he had his own agenda…
Upgrades by Daniel McPherson
Software updates. Sometimes they install cool new features. Other times they screw up your entire system. Which really sucks when the software is running inside your head.
The Great Abyss Disjunction by Danielle N. Gales
When Gregory Artifex became lighthouse keeper of the multiverse's loneliest dark corner, all he wanted was a little peace and quiet. The triggerfish, however, had different ideas. Gregory is about to have a very bad day.
The Bombastic Adventure of Bob from Planet 9 by Jaimie M. Engle
Bob and Melvin sit at Flo’s Intergalactic Greasy Spoon on the Tuesday the joint is held-up by two symmetrical beings called ‘humans’. Melvin accidentally disintegrates and Bob seeks revenge. But a visit to His Greatness on Planet 9 may change everything.
Do Flatulent Clowns Smell Funny by John H. Dromey
“Emission Possible” at the circus. The gastric suspense is intense. Will there be comic relief?
Dead Right, Dead Wrong By Ronald Friedman
The active Dead are not much different than the rest of us, although they can bore you to tears with stories about how they died. As the number of Dead increased they emerged from the shadows and became politically active. Their party, Dead Americans Mobilizing for National Integration and Tolerance (DAMNIT), was ready to field a candidate for the office of President of the United States.
Language Barrier by Steve Esling
"Mit-choo "Mitch" Maru is Tenerelli and Associate's first Titanian accountant! But his progress in breaking social barriers and becoming more than just a "token alien" comes to a halt after a sticky situation in the bathroom with a coworker. Will the skills he learned in his college English courses be enough to tell others about this unfortunate close encounter?"
Small Change by Steven Grassie
Miserable and almost broke, as per usual Paul’s in the pub drowning his sorrows. His evening takes a strange turn, however, when he encounters an interesting, if rather implausible, individual… who might just have the answer to his problems.
Cash on Delivery by Laura Thurston
When you absolutely, positively have to have had it already call Einstein Express, where hindsight is the same as foresight.
Overdue by Jay Fuller
When the librarian can flay your mind as easily as she can gut you, very little will stand between her and an overdue library book – even a powerful (and generally disagreeable) wizard. And what if the book wants a say in the matter?
Diary of an Overlord by Clay Sheldon
Villagers are terrified, heroes quake in their boots, and the world fears his very name. Witness the origin of a terrifying(ish) demon lord. But be warned:not everything is as it seems...
Thorkwald and the Cherub by Day Al-Mohamed
The adventures of a misfit demon and his struggle to succeed, or at least not get fired (literally) in Hell’s corporate world. With the help of his trusty minion, an eight-legged llama, and his Ctrl-Alt-Smite button, what could go wrong?
Chicken Soup for the Demonically Possessed Soul by Felicia Lee
In this heartwarming tale of loss, redemption, and best practices for web design, we follow Al, a promising young man in the prime of his life, as he faces down the demons of unethical competitors and, well, actual demons.
May 1st, 2014
Check out some old covers from the original magazine:
Risks and challenges
The book is 90% complete. I'm sure it will be ready to go by our May 1st deadline. The eBook will go out the door either way.
At this point, there are few risks.
Something could happen, I could be struck down dead by lightning or the zombie apocalypse might start.
You can never tell.
- (30 days)