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I will write a resume for your cat and physically mail it to up to 3 corporations (or people) of your choice.
18 backers pledged $141 to help bring this project to life.
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  1. Select this reward

    Pledge US$ 1 or more About US$ 1

    Observe From The Shadows

    I will give you a URL to a master index of all resumes sent out so you can amuse yourself without getting involved. Great for killing time at work while still looking like you are being productive.

    Includes:
    • URL to index of all resumes sent, and whom they were sent to.
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    5 backers
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  2. Select this reward

    Pledge US$ 5 or more About US$ 5

    Simple & Easy

    Give me a professional photo of your cat and tell me a bit about them and what kind of job they are looking for. I will write the resume and mail it to three(3) suitable corporations.

    Includes:
    • PDF + HTML digital copies of your cat's resume.
    • Video Clip: Proof of deposit into USPS blue mailboxes.
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    2 backers
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    Pledge US$ 10 or more About US$ 10

    Cover Letter

    5$ tier + Professional Cover Letter.

    Includes:
    • PDF + HTML digital copies of your cat's resume.
    • Video Clip: Proof of deposit into USPS blue mailboxes.
    • PDF + HTML digital copies of your cat's cover letter.
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    7 backers
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    Pledge US$ 15 or more About US$ 15

    LinkedIn Web Presence

    I will setup a LinkedIn page for your cat. Depending on your moral compass, I can also add them as a contractor to my real c-corporation. And I'll be sure to say good things about them when the employer phone calls start flooding in.

    Includes:
    • PDF + HTML digital copies of your cat's resume.
    • Video Clip: Proof of deposit into USPS blue mailboxes.
    • PDF + HTML digital copies of your cat's cover letter.
    • Username + Password to your LinkedIn account.
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    3 backers
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    Pledge US$ 20 or more About US$ 20

    Catnip Bribe

    I will put a smaller envelope full of catnip into each mailed resume as a bribe for H.R.
    For legal purposes, this is not actually a bribe, it's a "thank you for your time party favor".

    Includes:
    • PDF + HTML digital copies of your cat's resume.
    • Video Clip: Proof of deposit into USPS blue mailboxes.
    • PDF + HTML digital copies of your cat's cover letter.
    • Username + Password to your LinkedIn account.
    • Video Clip: Proof of insertion of catnip into all 3 letters.
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    Ships to Anywhere in the world
    0 backers
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    Pledge US$ 25 or more About US$ 25

    Mail the White House

    You miss 100% of the shots you don't take. If you don't apply to the top, you'll never make it to the top. Depending on your code of moral ethics, the resume can be mailed WITH or WITHOUT the catnip bribe*.

    This is 4 letters total. The previous 3 plus the letter to the White House. You will recieve video evidence of me inserting all 4 letters into those big blue steel USPS mail boxes in front of the post office.

    *Legally not a bribe, just a "thank you favor".

    Includes:
    • PDF + HTML digital copies of your cat's resume.
    • Video Clip: Proof of deposit into USPS blue mailboxes.
    • PDF + HTML digital copies of your cat's cover letter.
    • Username + Password to your LinkedIn account.
    • Video Clip: Proof of insertion of catnip into all 3 letters.
    • I will notify you if the White House responds.
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    Estimated delivery
    Ships to Anywhere in the world
    0 backers
    $

    By pledging you agree to Kickstarter's Terms of Use, Privacy Policy, and Cookie Policy.

    Kickstarter is not a store.

    It's a way to bring creative projects to life.

    Learn more about accountability.