50 editions of the phenomenally popular humor/satire column "Snide Remarks," delivered weekly (more or less*) (*less).
"Snide Remarks" is a weekly humor satire ha-ha laff column that I wrote for a couple newspapers from 1997 to 2003, and thereafter for the Internet -- the very same Internet that you are reading now!
Meanwhile, I make a living as a freelance writer, primarily for entertainment outlets like Film.com. None of those outlets want to pay me to write "Snide Remarks," though, and there aren't enough hours in the day or brain cells in my head for me to write it for free, on my own time, no matter how much I enjoy doing it (which is a lot).
So last year I ran a Kickstarter campaign to commission 50 "Snide Remarks" columns. Basically, I let you, the readers, become my employers. It went well, I wrote the 50 columns, and now ... well, here we are again. Time for my annual performance review!
My bid: For $6,000, I will write 50 more "Snide Remarks" columns. The first will be published on September 4, 2012, with the other 49 to follow on subsequent Tuesdays.
My plan is to follow a schedule of three weeks on, one week off. That would put the last of the columns at the end of 2013. Of course, you know what happens when you plan: you make an "ass" out of "u" and "me."
It was $5,000 last year. Why has it gone up? Well, Kickstarter and Amazon each take a cut that totals about 10 percent of the proceeds, which I failed to take into account last time. Furthermore: inflation, cost-of-living increase, my addiction to Frosted Mini-Wheats has grown more expensive, sheer greed, self-importance, etc.
This isn't a subscription model. Everyone will be able to read these columns, whether they contributed to the Kickstarter campaign or not. It's like PBS: funded by viewers like you, but you get to watch it even if you didn't pay anything, as long as enough other people do pay something.
If you're not familiar with "Snide Remarks," here are the archives. And here are a few of the columns I wrote under the last Kickstarter campaign that I think best reflect what "Snide Remarks" is all about:
"Rooster's Millions" -- Cockfighting, PETA, and Edgar Allan Poe
"Positive Buzz" -- Some people can do whatever they want
"The 2012 American Hunger Games" -- A live play-by-play commentary
"Jews Your Words Carefully" -- A dumb girl gets the wrong impression
"The Circle K of Life" -- The Snider boys' Christmas tradition
"Joseph's Blog: The Carin' Carpenter" -- An anecdote about poor hospitality
"Man Vs. Animal" -- It's not clear which of us is smarter
Let me know if you have any questions! I love writing "Snide Remarks," and I look forward to writing 50 more of them. Or even 500 more! But first 50.
Shaking hands cordially,
Eric D. Snider
UPDATE: This blog post goes into some more detail about "Snide Remarks," Kickstarter, and ham.
Have a question? If the info above doesn't help, you can ask the project creator directly.
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For a $20 contribution, I will call you on the phone and thank you personally! Then we can chat for a minute if you want, but not for too long, because I have to go.Estimated delivery:
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For a $50 contribution, I will draw you a picture! It will be just for you, mailed via postal service to your home, drawn and signed on paper by me. It probably won't be very good, artistically speaking, but it will be fun. You can specify something you'd like me to draw, or you can let me surprise you! Then you will always have a keepsake from that time you gave money to the Snide Remarks Kickstarter. (You also get the $25 reward.)Estimated delivery:
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For a c-note, you get to sponsor one of the 50 columns. Sponsorship means that at the end of the column there's an ad promoting whatever you want: your business, your website, a favorite charity, a picture of your lunch, whatever. You don't get any control over the content of the column, but when possible I'll match your ad with a related topic. If you're promoting something time-sensitive, we can have the ad run as close as possible to the date you specify. (You also get the $25 and $50 rewards.)Estimated delivery:
- (21 days)