The burning question that has been on everyone's mind as of late, 'Where can I find beautiful high quality smothering pillows?' has finally been answered. Answered by one of Doily Village's™ own indentured servants and mind slaves, Tim McGahren.
Doily Village™, a Subsidiary of Industrial Foods Co.™ is now calling for your help in making this dreamy dream of soft and supple Smothering Pillows™ a reality. We want to spread the love of our smothering pillows to faces all across the world, and hear muffled cheers of joy.
Smothering Pillows™ (Pat. Pending) are quaint and novel devices which serve as subtle warnings to family members who have a tendency to act up and out. Embroidered on the front with the words 'Smothering Pillows' framed by flowers, and on the rear with messages of the toughest love, like 'Stop Struggling', 'It's for the best', 'It Will all be over soon', 'Only Dreams Now', 'No more Tears', 'Shush now' and for southerners; 'Bless your heart'. We will also take suggestions for other pillows, and as rewards for special sweeties, allow them the choice of available embroidered messages.
Although you have seen the prototypes in the video, we would like to increase the quaintness and mawkishness of the pillows through careful redesign of the embroidery. We will also select a fabric which will not only be soft to the touch and which can shape to the contours of the human face, but one which will be firm enough so the wielder's hands will not be dislodged by flailing limbs. A substantial portion of the funds will go to producing the first run, marketing and legal representation.
There are also negligible items we need to pay for, such as packaging and of course the attachment of disclaimer tags which state 'For entertainment purposes only, unless you are entertained by smothering, then no.'
We are asking all interested parties to donate, and in return we offer pillows and other products related to Doily Village™ and special messages from our indentured mind slave. Of these pillows, the first two will be sent to Amy Sedaris, the goddess we worship in our daily prayer circles in Doily Village™.
Thank you for your interest in this product and we hope to reach and perhaps exceed our goal. If we do surpass our goal, then we would like to offer some great stretch goals like blanket party blankets and monogrammed chloroform rags.
Thank you for your support and interest in this project from all of the sweet and unassuming grannies here in Doily Village™.
Risks and challenges
The main risk and challenge I am dealing with is that I am essentially making something which may may find distasteful in it's soft, supple and quaint dark comedy.
For that I will have to make sure I dot my t's and cross my i's and make sure everything is in place so this is considered only what it is, a novelty joke item.Learn about accountability on Kickstarter
- (30 days)