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the future of futile piss sim
the future of futile piss sim
474 backers pledged $13,451 to help bring this project to life.

About this project

-CRYPT UNDERWORLD- a sequel to "crypt worlds" project video thumbnail
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$13,451

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it has been five minutes since the end of "crypt worlds" and everything is over

all things of that world have perished, and now you, a humble rando, are plunged into a feverish vision of the underworld, forced to build a new home for yourself in this foreboding space

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UPDATE #1: the project has been funded!! i'm so beyond speechless, this has been a huge success and i really appreciate it :>

in other news it's time for MURDER WEEK get your funding in while you can!!!

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Crypt Underworld is a first-person hell labyrinth about eating garbage food and finding weird trinkets and exploring vast decaying cityscapes while trying not to vomit constantly. i made it because i wanted to capture the feelings i had living alone in a large american city with little money, among other things.

SOME FEATURES:

  • exciting piss-based gameplay utilizing revolutionary advancements in piss physics.
  • also now you can piss on people to knock off their limbs and steal them.
  • more in-game stripmalls than you can probably imagine
  • every alley, every door, leads somewhere even worse than before.
  • a complex set of interlocking narratives, with the ability to befriend and become close with certain characters
  • a focus on day-to-day life in the city as you uncover its secrets
  • an apartment you can upgrade, and decorate with the things you find in the world. if you are a dracula you can buy a coffin for it
  • dendygar

COOL PIX:

poster art by musbuh
poster art by musbuh
                  

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deep in the heart of nindendy hq, a cry is heard late at night.... on many a night such as this, the agonized wails of "game dev" can be heard- nefarious schemes, block puzzles, coins.... what FOOLS would dare develop such diabolical distractions?? let's find out!

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(LILY ZONE) > "HI KIDS IT'S ME you might remember me from such classics as 'video game number one' and 'stop calling the nintendo hotline' WELL TODAY I'M HERE TO TELL YA ABOUT THE HOT NEW SENSATION ON THE BLOCK it's overtaking our minds, bodies, and hearts, folks, it's: CRYPT WORLDS 2 and anyway i made the first game and now i'm making this sequel with all my awful art skills and computer crap superpowers and it worries me but i hope you can all put your trust in me anyway..... just believe.... oh yeah also i have a website and twitter and whatever the heck. play my games or don't. thanks."

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 (ZOË SPARKS) > "Hihi! I’m Zoë Sparks, a Silky Fantail pigeon with an ushanka on. I spend my time taking naps in comfy alcoves, eating bits of seed, and programming a computer and using it to write stories and poems and things. I’m involved in this project in both a coding and a writing capacity. I make music too, but elsewhere. You can find me at my website milky.flowers and on Twitter. “Feral pigeons find the ledges of buildings to be a substitute for sea cliffs. . . "

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 (BRENDA NEOTENOMIE) > "Hi! I'm a musician and game developer, and I’m super honored to provide music and sound design for the sequel to Crypt Worlds. I created the soundtrack to Porpentine’s games With Those We Love Alive and Neon Haze, among others. I also develop my own music, toys and games. I hope Crypt Underworld will usher in a golden era of iconoclastic, abrasive bleepy bloopy-bonks that leads to a total overthrow of society or at least provides some comfort to my fellow mutants."

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MONEY... an eternal terror which drives us all!! ahh, what illustrious fear. and it is that very fear which brings us here today!!

this game is being developed by 3 broke trans artists, and every bit helps us to cover rent, buy food, and generally survive while developing the project. work on the game has been underway for a year, and there are already large, fleshed-out areas. i'm planning to have the game complete in under 2 years, and with the money from this kickstarter i'll be able to buy a new computer to replace my ancient laptop as well, which should help immensely with development.

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THE VERDICT IS IN... and it turns out humans LOVE to say stuff about videogame!! in defense of questionable ethical practices, Nindendy Co CEO Lily presents these words of approval for the first game "Crypt Worlds" to dissuade naysayers. TAKE A LOOK--

Praise for Crypt Worlds:

"My first time playing through the game I accidentally summoned the Chaos God, which turned the entire world into a barren, red hellscape, at which point the only thing left to do was restart from the beginning" - Jordan Rosenberg, *Kill Screen*

"Exploring Crypt World is a deliberately disjointed experience, one that is full of incongruous archaeologists and occasional telephones. Televisions will wonder why they are there, and people will tell you that down that tunnel they doubt there will be anything cool." - Cara Ellison, *Rock Paper Shotgun* 

"The magic dream of videogames - an intricate digital realm corpses, indistinguishable from our own! With what seas to swim, which glades to step thus unshackled from our mortal corpses cares! Yet how few developers are willing to corpses corpses corpses! Only LILITH ZONE, magisterial authrix of the CRYPT WORLDS series of digital experiences, truly possesses the corpses to corpses corpses corpses corpses corpses. Corpses corpses SHENMUE corpses corpses corpses dynamic crafting system. Piss on corpses corpses corpses until corpses corpses DOKI DOKI PANIC. How do i corpses corpses corpses corpses corpses corpses corpses corpses corpses corpses corpses corpses corpses corpses corpses corpses corpses corpses corpses corpses corpses corpses corpses corpses corpses corpses corpses corpses corpses 100 stars." - Dr. Stephen Thecatamites

"One of the weirdest and most fascinating games I’ve ever played." - Vinny Vinesauce, *That Let's Play Guy*

"Lily Zone is going to destroy you, and you're going to thank her for it" - Porpentine, Expert

Risks and challenges

I'm confident that we'll complete the project, I've finished long games before and work has been proceeding steadily.
Videogames videogames videogames, videogame, video game..........

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  1. Select this reward

    Pledge $1 or more About $1.00

    for $1 i will send you a REAL PICTURE of a virtual JAR OF BLOOD it can be used for anything ranging from FOOD to PROP now the future is yours trademark nindendy WOW IT'S LIKE I'M DREAMING

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    Pledge $5 or more About $5

    i will send you the same picture of a virtual jar of blood TWICE now you can have one for home and one on the go. isn't technology amazing...?? limited time offer

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    Pledge $10 or more About $10

    instead of a "virtual blood jar" you will, upon the fated day, receive a digital download of "crypt underworld" ~for pc, mac, and linux~ and maybe it'll be ok

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    Pledge $20 or more About $20

    you get "CRYPT UNDERWORLD" digital download, the original soundtrack, and i'll send you a download for the CRYPT COLORING BOOK (!!!) b/w 8 pages of crypt coloring action you'll have to see to believe WOW all in a folder in high-quality "png" glory so you can really pretend you're gnawing those bones

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  5. Select this reward

    Pledge $50 or more About $50

    an 11x17 inches, glossy one sided poster with art by Mushbuh

    comes with digital downloads, soundtrack, coloring book, etc, etc

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    Pledge $150 or more About $150

    i will send you a ~RARE COPY~ of the original crypt worlds on cd, with a handmade origami case and marker illustrations + a mysterious fortune.... what will you get?? each cover and fortune is unique

    includes digital download, soundtrack, coloring book, barffff

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    Reward no longer available 5 backers
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    Pledge $250 or more About $250

    i will put your name on a tombstone in-game so you can impress all your friends
    includes digital download, coloring book, soundtrack, blah

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  8. Select this reward

    Pledge $1,000 or more About $1,000

    in dialogue, dendygar will list you off as a cool person. i will talk with you about including yr "cryptsona" in-game, or not if all you want is dendygar's approval

    comes with digital download, soundtrack, and coloring book as well

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Funding period

- (30 days)