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Join me in publishing this book of life, laughs, list and lies I wrote through character HolyJuan. Because I love me. You should  to!
Join me in publishing this book of life, laughs, list and lies I wrote through character HolyJuan. Because I love me. You should to!
54 backers pledged $2,450 to help bring this project to life.

About this project

I Love Me. Who Do You Love? - My life as Holyjuan project video thumbnail
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$2,450

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In 2006, I started my website, www.holyjuan.com. The first thing I wrote was a story about living on a barge in Alaska while I worked at a fish cannery.  The stories I wrote bounced between memories and my daily events at work, around friends and with my growing family. I started to find my voice.

A screen grab of HolyJuan from 2007.
A screen grab of HolyJuan from 2007.

I expanded to crafting humorous lists and 'How To' instructions. I was drawing really crappy comics, getting my hair cut at a black barber shop and writing Erik Eats episodes. My audience grew and began to email me questions for my "Ask HolyJuan" articles.

Proof that I have one fan.
Proof that I have one fan.

Over 10 years, I made over 1500 posts.  And I knew that within those posts, there was a collection of stories and articles that would make a great book if they were gathered together.  Currently, I have about 150 pages of material written with about 50 more to go.  I want to write some unpublished material and explore a bit more about who HolyJuan was, who he isnow and how Fake Dispatch has slowly (actually quickly) snuffed him out.

I would like your help making this book a reality.  I am working with a publisher to go through the tedious task of checking my grammar and assisting with the layout of the book.  I need to pay someone to help me with the cover, because as you can see from the image at the top of this page, I might be great at Photoshop, but I stink at graphic design.  I have to get people, like Michelle, to design things for me, like my business card:

I am starting out by raising the money necessary to get the book professionally published in glorious black and white.  I am going to forego printing in color due to the expense.  Fortunately, almost all of my comics are black ink on white paper.

My rewards include getting a signed copy of the book, getting invited to the book signing party, having Fake Dispatch write a Tweet of your choosing, writing an Ask HolyJuan question that makes it in the book and my favorite, your photo, with me, on my desk for four years.

Fiona has been on my desk for 20 years, I can stand you for four.
Fiona has been on my desk for 20 years, I can stand you for four.

Here is what the $50 Powers That Be Reward could look like:

Thanks for the idea, Jen!
Thanks for the idea, Jen!

The funds for my project are being spent on publishing, editing, creative services and fees from Kickstarter.  I've divided them up into this  pie chart.  I spent a few extra bucks to get it into 3D.

My stretch goal will be an audio book. Have you ever wondered what Jamole's voice sounded like?  What about my imitation of Handsome Joe? Or better yet... let's get Handsome Joe in the studio to record his own lines.  Can you imaging the sounds effects from The Fight That Never Happened?

For now, help me to make this book a reality.  There are a few fun rewards and hopefully, I'll be adding more in the next 20 days.  Thank you for any support you can provide!

Risks and challenges

Putting together a collection of stories like this takes a lot of work, not only with writing, but also with editing and layout. I've enlisted the help of CreateSpace to edit, assist with layout and to get the book into a digital format.

While I am still editing and adding to this collection of stories, please note that the hardest part of all this was narrowing down which stories were going to make the final cut. I think you will be pleased with the selection I am putting together.

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  1. Select this reward

    Pledge $10 or more About $10

    A $10 Pat On The Back

    Good job, Doug. You poked fun of people, lied, made up some stuff and then wrote it down. Consider this $10 as my Participation Trophy to you. (As my thanks for your pat on the back, I'll give you a credit in the book as a Backer.)

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    Pledge $11 or more About $11

    Anonymous $11 Pat On The Back

    Same as the above, except that I won't put your real name in the book. Consider it a $1 fee for witness protection. I will make up a good fake anonymous nickname for you.

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    Pledge $15 or more About $15

    The e-book, oh oh the e-book.

    I will e-mail you an electronic version of the book in Epub or PDF. You will also get your name in the Backer section of the book.

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    Pledge $20 or more About $20

    The hardest of the hard copies.

    I have instructed the publisher to ensure that all the paper is made of the hardest woods so that my book hard copy will be the hardest. They said "no" but I think they did that because they fear the hardness of my book. You will also get your name in the book's Backer section. Hard.

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    Pledge $25 or more About $25

    Your Book. My Ego. A signed hard copy.

    Technically, me signing your book makes it worth less, but I'm still going to ask you for the full $25. I can personalize the book OR you can ask to be demoralized. Either way. You will still get your name in the book's Backer section.

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    Pledge $30 or more About $30

    Book signing party invite!

    Join us at a to be determined location for the official book signing. Get your book signed in person. Have me draw your caricature in the back. Have a few and then work up the courage to ask Miss Sally what her plans are after I pass. Location, time and date TBD in May. Finally, your opportunity to track me down in person and have me explain why I broke up with you in high school / college / a week before my wedding. You will still get that mention in the Backers section.

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    Pledge $50 or more About $50

    A mention on Fake Dispatch

    Fake Dispatch is my Twitter account with over 18,000 followers. I will post whatever 140 characters you come up with (within reason) Use it for advertising, to tell off your boss or slander me. The Tweet will come with a small image saying that it is from this Kickstarter. You will also get an invite to the book signing party, a copy of the signed book with no shipping cost and your name in the Backers section of the book.

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    Pledge $50 or more About $50

    The Powers That Be - Doug

    There are few things in my life that are more precious that my photo of The Powers That Be. These friends have stayed friends even when I welched on bets, made endless fun of them or slept with their wife, Antonia. This reward level will allow you to pick an image (within reason) and place it over the face (and possibly body) of Doug. This edited photo will remain on my desk for a year.

    See photo in the body of the KickStarter for the original photo and example edits.

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    Pledge $50 or more About $50

    The Powers That Be - Andy

    There are few things in my life that are more precious that my photo of The Powers That Be. These friends have stayed friends even when I welched on bets, made endless fun of them or slept with their wife, Antonia. This reward level will allow you to pick an image (within reason) and place it over the face (and possibly body) of Andy. This edited photo will remain on my desk for a year.

    See photo in the body of the KickStarter for the original photo and example edits.

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    Pledge $50 or more About $50

    The Powers That Be - Jen

    There are few things in my life that are more precious that my photo of The Powers That Be. These friends have stayed friends even when I welched on bets, made endless fun of them or slept with their wife, Antonia. This reward level will allow you to pick an image (within reason) and place it over the face (and possibly body) of Jen. This edited photo will remain on my desk for a year.

    See photo in the body of the KickStarter for the original photo and example edits.

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    Pledge $50 or more About $50

    The Powers That Be - Dave

    There are few things in my life that are more precious that my photo of The Powers That Be. These friends have stayed friends even when I welched on bets, made endless fun of them or slept with their wife, Antonia. This reward level will allow you to pick an image (within reason) and place it over the face (and possibly body) of Dave. This edited photo will remain on my desk for a year.

    See photo in the body of the KickStarter for the original photo and example edits.

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    Pledge $100 or more About $100

    Our photo on my desk for 4 years

    For a mere $100, I will have a photo of you and me taken with us holding the book in between us. I will give you a copy of the photo and I will take a copy of the photo and keep it on my work desk for the next four years. I will wear a Homestar Runner t-shirt in the photo. You can wear what you want. If we cannot get together in Ohio for a photo, I will photoshop us together in a photo that will be slightly indistinguishable from the real thing. You will also get the invite to the book signing party, a signed copy of the book sent and no cost and a mention in the Backer's section.

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    Pledge $200 or more About $200

    Ask HolyJuan

    I will allow up to four people to ask me a question and I will answer it in the book. Usually you do not get the answer you are looking for, but we all get entertained in the process. You will also get an invite to the book signing party, a signed copy of the book with no shipping costs and a mention in the Backer's section.

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Funding period

- (20 days)