This project's funding goal was not reached on October 16, 2012.
About this project
The book is about the ultimate human drama - an extra-marital affair of the heart. The book is based on countless interviews with people from across the country who is/was involved in an affair at some level. The book is evenly split up between men and women. As you read the book, you will discover various differences between the sexes in how they look at affairs which may surprise you. You will read the stories of people who confront their choice to lead double lives each and every day. Some of these stories are inspiring tales of women who escaped an abusive relationship with the aid of a lover. Some recant the story of a man who found the woman of his dreams. There are also a few stories that will make your heart cry with sadness. You may like or dislike some of the characters in this book. You may empathize or even identify with some of them but you will have an opinion about them.
We agonized over what chapter to post here as a book sample. We didn't want to post one of the best stories prior to the book's release. We weren't sure to go with the story of a man or woman. In the end, we chose an excerpt from a representative of each sex. We hope you enjoy them.
I Just Want to Be Lois Lane for a While
I am, I am, I am Superman
and I know what’s happening.
I am, I am, I am Superman
and I can do anything.
- Superman, REM
I interviewed Angela over a cup of coffee one morning. She represents so many women today who are overworked, over-committed and over-stressed. She is a giver, and the thing about giving all the time is that, eventually, you give out. I wish I had met her prior to the timetable of this story to witness the difference in her demeanor and personality that I’m sure came forth as a result of her relationships of escape. This is her story:
“I was enjoying a lunch date with another man I had met on the Internet. He was my third lunch date this month as I was putting a lot of effort into trying to meet someone. He and I had really hit it off online and I was having high hopes for this guy. We had spoken on the phone a couple of times prior to this and his wit and his charm were very enticing. I was doing most of the talking so far this time, however, somewhat out of nervousness and also because I needed to rant a little bit, I guess. He was making even more headway with me at lunch due to the fact that, unlike my husband of seventeen years, I could tell that he was intently listening to my every word and displayed interest, even if it was not genuine.
“I was describing a typical week in the life of Angela to him. I have a very demanding job in the finance department of a large hospital that often requires me to take work home with me. I am also the mother to two very athletic boys which requires me to transport them around everywhere to their games and practices. On top of that, I have a husband who does absolutely nothing around the house to help out, which means that I end up doing all of the cooking and cleaning and even home repair, believe it or not. As I was reiterating my busy life to him, I began to wonder where in the world I had time for a romantic relationship on top of that, as I barely had time for myself already. I imagine he was thinking the same thing.
“’I get it,’ he said after I had finally paused long enough for him to get a word in. “You’re tired of being Superman all the time for your family and now you want to just be Lois Lane for a while.”
“I think my jaw dropped upon hearing him say that. He had just articulated the summation of my feelings in one simple phrase. Yes, I was tired of being Superman, tired of being the super hero that my family constantly depended on over and over again. I indeed wanted to be Lois Lane for a while. I wanted to be the damsel in distress and let Superman come to my rescue. I wanted a man to wine and dine me and woo me into bed, taking command of my body and making love to me again and again. I wanted someone to take charge of the moment for me, instead of the other way around, like it has been for more than a decade. This guy got it. He understood where I was coming from.
“We talked for the full duration of lunch. He took the bill without hesitation, which was nice, and we both headed for the door. I pointed to my van parked in the front row of the restaurant. Being that I did want a goodbye kiss, I was wishing that I had parked in a less conspicuous spot. He walked me up to the driver’s door, thanked me for lunch and then leaned forward to kiss me. The moment our lips touched, our arms wrapped around each other in lockstep as we pulled each other in. My God, he knew how to kiss! And then, as quickly as the storm within us had brewed, our passion receded as we realized that we were putting on a show for everyone in the restaurant.
Buy the book to read what happens next . . . . .
The Curse of Being Capricorn
let me in I wanna be your friend
I want to guard your dreams and visions
Just wrap your legs round these velvet rims
And strap your hands across my engines
Together we could break this trap
We'll run till we drop, baby we'll never go back
Will you walk with me out on the wire
`cause baby I'm just a scared and lonely rider
But I gotta find out how it feels
I want to know if love is wild, girl I want to know if love is real
- Bruce Springsteen, Born To Run
As a Capricorn myself, I was delighted to receive Don’s story submission for my book. He is a philosopher and romantic. He chooses his words and descriptors carefully and does so with care and precision in order to create an orchestrated scene within the mind of the reader. I think many of us feel like he does as a result of the Great Recession. We continue to be overworked and overstressed and are beginning to question the lifestyles that we must constantly work to finance. Like Don, we long to romp in the beautiful meadow below and frolic the day away with that special someone. I admire Don’s vision and I would like to make it my own.
“I am a Capricorn. I’ve never been one that looks at my daily astrology chart or anything like that, but my dad instilled a sense of Capricorn pride within me from an early age. My dad is a Capricorn as well and told me he even had a boss one time who only hired Capricorns. If you are unfamiliar with the Capricorn symbolism, we are the mountain goat that scales the rocky cliffs. We are planners and are constantly working on multiple goals simultaneously. We are silent achievers. Most people underestimate us. They compare us in contrast to the robust looking Aires ram, Taurus the bull or Leo the lion and just nod their heads. That goat doesn’t have a chance they say to themselves. But while those mighty signs charge ahead of us, relying on their physical strength to overcome whatever obstacles lie ahead, we have already mapped out the journey ahead. And as they stumble and eventually fall, tumbling back down the mountain, we meticulously make our way up the rocky cliffs, one step at a time, carefully maneuvering the narrow path, until finally it is us who stands at the crest of the mountain peak, enjoying the view of success and triumph. It is the Capricorn who eventually gets that big job promotion, lands the big client, or gets the girl in the end. Never underestimate the goat.
“Being a Capricorn is also a curse however, for as we are enjoying the crisp mountain air, the wondrous view from the peak, and a sense of accomplishment, we find that there is another mountain peak just ahead. The mountain there is taller than the one we currently stand on, its view even more enticing, or so we tell ourselves. This discovery sends us onward on an endless journey to scale that next peak, and the next one, and the next, for there is always another one. It is a cycle that has no end.
It is a cycle that is perpetuated by my wife. She quickly learned of insatiable appetite for accomplishment and success. She let go of her career five years into our marriage, letting me carry the load of providing for our family. Unfortunately, she insists on living an expensive lifestyle. She has also invested our money in real estate ventures that she would get excited about, only to have them go nowhere. In order to sustain her doings, I have been forced to work multiple jobs over throughout most of our marriage, sometimes as many as four jobs at one time. I make a lot of money, but work eats up much of my life. I am like the mouse on the wheel, no matter how fast I run, I never get ahead.
Ten years ago I lost my job in a recession. It took me almost a year to find work again. During that time my wife refused to look for work to help us out. At that time, we had two houses thanks to a real estate investment that she had made. We were draining thousands of dollars out of checking account every month. I was so stressed. I broke down several times and sobbed during that time as I realized that even my Capricorn brain couldn’t figure out how to get us out of that mess. It is amazing I didn’t have a heart attack back then. I have never forgiven my wife for not helping us out back then. She stood by and watched my demise. I still can’t talk about that time without tearing up and she continues to not understand why. It was the worst year of my life and I have yet to not feel the sting of it. It’s about that time as well that my wife started refusing to have intercourse with me. I don’t know why, maybe she looked at me differently once I became unemployed. I know she loves me, but I have felt like I am only a machine to her, a machine that never stops working, ensuring that her lifestyle is preserved.
But like all Capricorns, I got back on my feet and within six months was riding the plight of success yet again. It was at that time however, that I would break now and then along my ascent of whatever mountain I was climbing at the time and gaze down at the lush green meadow below. The problem with climbing rocky cliffs is that you are constantly looking at the trail in front of you, a trail of dirt, gravel and an occasional boulder. The sprouts of grass that grow along those cliffs are few and far between and barely satisfy. I soon became infatuated with the meadow below and longed to consume its appetizing dark green blades of grass. I longed to run amongst the blooming wild flowers and enjoy their spring like smells. I aspired to enjoy the warmth of the sunshine down below, rather than the cold thin air of the mountains that I was constantly enduring. Most of all though, I wanted to lay a blanket down in that meadow, and share it with a beautiful young lady, a lady who would love me not for my mountain climbing or my potential, but for the man I am.
And so nine years ago, I started visiting the meadow and have frequented it on occasion. While doing so, I have spoken with many women over the years, mostly through email, met a dozen or so for lunch at one time or another, and had two past relationships. It is truly amazing to me how many lonely married women there are out there, and how many there are who long to share a blanket in the meadow with a man who will pay attention, listen to them, and make them feel special.
Buy the book to read what happens next . . . . .
Have a question? If the info above doesn't help, you can ask the project creator directly.
- (35 days)