Island of Dr. Death
Emoji after emoji after emoji.
Is there a ‘wandering around in the living room, looking for a ghost inside myself’ emoji?
I won’t grow too weird for you here. Suffice to say that I was on the island for three days, and on the second, in a set of emotional moments, something inside me was suddenly gone, and I put down the pen and—— you know how sometimes when you think you hear a noise, you tilt your head just so and you set your entire body to a stillness?——I did that, and waited.
I’m not sure what I waited for. Anxiety? I can’t say it has been like there was a voice inside because thoughts, as I’m sure you experience (unless you’re a zombie, which, cool, let’s talk about a book idea), come as a sort-of hybrid blend of vision and word and —— ehhhh, the imagination is such a strange thing to explain, right? Thoughts. So real and then completely formless.
Cool shit, frankly. I love trying to go there.
But: those thoughts, I guess, they were gone. All the ones associated with Ugo.
I wandered out into the living room where Rob was making some food and kept looking for them and I didn’t want to pop the champagne because I was still x pages of looseleaf from the backside of the binder, but I had to at some point, just to be part of the world again.
Wait. Check one more time inside with a single eye closed.
—I think I finished…