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Lonely? Pining for the seashore? We can help!
Lonely? Pining for the seashore? We can help!
131 backers pledged $2,339 to help bring this project to life.

About this project

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$2,339

131

Lonely? Pining for the seashore?  

 

Do It With a Deep One!  

Hot single deep ones in your area are looking to meet you! And Petersen Games can help. We’ll ship you an Undersea Contact Device. Simply say the prayer as shown below, and drop the device (made of durable rock!) into the nearest large body of water. If a Deep One settlement is close enough, you’ll be getting a midnight visit within the following week. Be sure to affix your name and address to the rock, so your aquatic pals can find you more quickly. It’s just that easy! Your new friends will initiate you into the Cult of Dagon. 

Once you’ve taken the Third Oath of Dagon, you’ll get a Deep One of your very own to have and to hold. Until death do you part.  

And your kids will live forever!  

That’s right. Any offspring from this unhallowed union will start out looking just like cute little human babies, the type everyone loves. Of course, human children eventually grow up, and get less cute, and these do the same. They just take a different path towards un-cute-ness! 

  

The Prayer

When you drop the device into the water, just say this prayer! (You might want to write it down and keep it on hand, for convenience.)

 

Be sure to say it perfectly, or it might not work. Petersen Games is not liable for the side effects of mispronunciations. 

Risks and challenges

Well, there might not be a Deep One settlement in the place you drop your Undersea Contact Device. Not much we can do about that.

Or you might pronounce the prayer wrong.

Or the Deep Ones might be really busy and not able to get to you for a few months.

Petersen Games is not liable for acts of the Deep Ones. Backers are personally responsible for negotiations and further communications and relations with Deep Ones. Petersen Games only promises to provide the means of initiating contact.

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  1. Select this reward

    Pledge $1 or more About $1.00

    Cheapskate

    Beware the wrath of the undying Deep Ones, due to your penurious nature. But until they seek their revenge, you can comment on our project and get updates.

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  2. Select this reward

    Pledge $25 or more About $25

    Lonely Hearts

    We’ll ship you your very own Undersea Contact Device. Satisfaction not guaranteed. Shipping included.

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    92 backers
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Funding period

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