I’ve created eight new calamitous designs which I call the Now What? Series. These new designs are a whimsical celebration of the dominant fact of modern life—that each new day seems to bring some fresh exasperation.
They’ll all look great beside your Calamityware porcelain.
The shallow bowls are perfect for soup, stews, salads, ice cream, and your world-famous chili. The well is about 0.75" deep (2 cm) and holds 8 oz (230 ml) of liquid.
The small plates will accommodate sandwiches, light meals, salads, snacks, and all manner of desserts.
Top quality. Like the Calamityware dinner plates, these bowls and small plates are porcelain and produced at the award-winning Kristoff workshop in Poland using the in-glaze technique. Final production will feature white porcelain with a rich blue image. Food safe, microwave safe, and dishwasher safe, these plates are sturdy enough for daily use and beautiful enough to hang on your walls—bowls and small plates that are destined to become treasured family heirlooms.
In-glaze plates are fired at extra-high temperatures to allow the image to melt slightly into the surface of the plate. Connoisseurs will appreciate the beauty of the in-glaze technique which the artists at Kristoff have been refining since 1831. This is the look of porcelain you see in museums. Sweet.
Will all the plates in this suite match? No. The designs of each bowl and small plate are different. If you appreciate the notion of “eclectic,” you’ll be delighted.
The bowls and small plates are exactly the same size as the insect-infested bowls and small plates I produced as a Kickstarter project back in 2016. These new designs should delight the people who can’t stand the idea of bugs, or pictures of bugs, on their dinnerware.
Multiples of four. Offering individual bowls or single plates is far too complicated for me. Instead, I have reward levels for a set of four bowls, a set of four small plates, or both. Each set of four includes four different designs. If you need more, there are also pledge levels for eights and twelves.
The diagram below shows you each pledge variation.
If you do a lot of entertaining and need more than 12 plates or bowls, let me know and I’ll figure out how to accommodate you.
If you really only want one small plate, I urge you to think of the extras as potential gifts for your friends who are calamity aficionados. Bake some cookies. Put them on a plate. Suddenly, you are a hero.
When can I expect these rewards? Assuming nothing calamitous happens, you should be dining with oddities by February 2020. Probably sooner.
Where are you? When the rewards are nearly ready to ship, I will send out a Kickstarter address survey. I can’t send you your reward until you send me your current address. So please complete the survey as soon as it is available. If I don’t get your address within 6 months, it may not be possible to give you your reward.
International shipping. Calamityware plates can ship anywhere in the world. Orders outside the U.S. have a postage charge that varies depending on where the package is going. Porcelain plates are heavy, so postage costs are shockingly high. But for a treasured heirloom that may last generations, perhaps you can justify the expense.
Read this if you are outside the U.S. In some countries, customs duties may be applied to plate shipments. I have no way of predicting what customs fees might be and if they’ll apply to your shipment. Customs inspections are very arbitrary and willy-nilly. Most packages sail through without any duty, but some are selected by chance and the recipient gets hit with a duty fee. So if you can’t tolerate the risk that your shipment might get selected for extra costs, you should probably not support this project. Or arrange to have your reward shipped to a friend in the U.S. who can bring you your porcelain in their luggage next trip.
If you are an international sponsor and receive a tracking number when we ship, track your package daily to make sure it doesn’t get hung up in the system and returned to us. Don’t just assume it will show up at your door. Shipments have a way of getting stalled, and monitoring the status of the tracking number allows you to intervene promptly.
Shipping is provided by our capable and multi-talented partners at Fulfillrite. Our Fulfillrite friends are fast and they do things right the first time.
What’s going on? Sponsors of this project will receive periodic updates through Kickstarter as the project unfolds.
Caring for porcelain is easy. How much pampering you give your porcelain should depend on how long you want it to last. I wrote a blog post that offers practical advice about living with porcelain. Read it and follow the advice if you want to keep your porcelain pristine.
Questions? Send me your questions and I’ll add them along with the answers to the FAQ section of this page.
If you missed my previous Kickstarter projects, you’ll find a few earlier plates at Calamityware.com. There are some other unusual products there, too, that began as Kickstarter-Don projects.
Don—Pittsburgh, September 6, 2019
Risks and challenges
Countless things could go wrong to delay this project. But the design is done and the pre-production proofs have been approved. So if I get enough sponsors for a production run, I can green-light production right away.
I’m using a workshop that produces porcelain for monarchs and potentates and has perfected production techniques over 180 years. So technical problems are unlikely. The biggest risk is that production or delivery will take longer than anticipated. In the past, I have had to wait while bigger orders for some mighty king or potentate got to go in the kiln ahead of me. That might happen again. But our turn will come eventually.
I promise that I won’t stop working until all my sponsors receive their Calamityware plates. My gloomiest prediction is that we will ship by February 2020. I will try to make it sooner. I’ll give you steady updates all along the way.Learn about accountability on Kickstarter