I love to draw. The drawings I like best make me laugh.
This project is about producing museum-quality dinner plates infested with a plethora of frogs. Imagine these bad boys behind your French toast! The closer you look, the more frogs you’ll see.
What you’ll get. Sponsors will receive porcelain dinner plates that are sturdy enough to use every day. Food safe, microwave safe, and dishwasher safe. Or you can hang them on your walls as evidence of your refined good taste and wry sense of humor.
Top quality. Like the previous Calamityware™ dinner plate series, these amphibian-infested plates will be produced at the award-winning Kristoff workshop in Poland using the in-glaze technique. Final production will feature white porcelain with a rich blue image—destined to become treasured family heirlooms.
In-glaze plates are fired at extra-high temperatures to allow the image to melt slightly into the surface of the plate. Connoisseurs will appreciate the beauty of the in-glaze technique which the artists at Kristoff have been refining since 1831. This is the look of porcelain you see in museums. Sweet.
A new dinner plate series. This plate design is the first in a series of four that will be Kickstarter projects in 2016. Next in the series you’ll find  Jogging Sasquatch,  Zombie Poodles, and  Pterodactyl. There’s even a pledge level (E) to get the whole series with one pledge. I’ll ship the E-level rewards when the last plate in the series is done.
Will all the plates in this series match? No. The designs of the plate borders and central image of each Calamityware plate are different. If you appreciate the notion of “eclectic,” you’ll be delighted. But if you are a perfectionist about matching, you should order enough of your favorite Calamityware plate so all your guests have the same design.
Free shipping in USA. If you live in the United States, there’s no additional charge to deliver your reward to your door. We’ll also apply the amount we’ve budgeted for postage to international orders, so international sponsors only need to pay the extra amount beyond what a U.S. shipment costs.
When can I expect these plates? Assuming nothing calamitous happens, you should be dining with a plague of frogs in August 2016. Probably sooner.
International shipping. Calamityware plates can ship anywhere in the world. Orders outside the U.S. have a postage charge that varies depending on where the package is going. Porcelain plates are heavy, so postage costs are shockingly high. But for a treasured heirloom that may last generations, perhaps you can justify the expense.
Read this if you are outside the U.S. In some countries, customs duties may be applied to plate shipments. I have no way of predicting if they’ll apply to your shipment. Customs inspections are very arbitrary and willy-nilly. Most packages sail through without any duty, but some are selected by chance and the recipient gets hit with a duty fee. So if you can’t tolerate the risk that your shipment might get selected for extra costs, you should probably not support this project. Or arrange to have your reward shipped to a friend in the U.S. who can bring you your porcelain in their luggage next trip.
We’ll be using the U.S. Postal Service for these shipments because that seems to minimize the number of packages that get hit with customs fees, and there are no extra broker fees added.
If you are an international sponsor and receive a tracking number when we ship, track your package daily to make sure it doesn’t get hung up in the system and returned to us. Don’t just assume it will show up at your door. Shipments have a way of getting stalled, and monitoring the status of the tracking number allows you to intervene promptly.
What people are saying about this project
“The frogs might be my favorite Calamityware design.” The Amazing Karen
“Frogs! OMG! I can’t wait to pounce on these.” Suze
“At first, everything looks normal. Then one notices a frog. Suddenly frogs are visible everywhere. Riveting.” Charles
“Nothing captures people’s attention like a plague of frogs.” Moses
What’s going on? Sponsors of this project will receive periodic updates through Kickstarter as the project unfolds. You can also receive a trickle of news about designing, producing, and enjoying Calamityware plates (and the other projects Don is working on) by liking the Calamityware Facebook page.
Caring for porcelain is easy. How much pampering you give your porcelain should depend on how long you want it to last. I wrote a blog post recently that offers practical advice about living with porcelain. Read it and follow the advice if you want to keep your porcelain pristine.
Questions? Send me your questions and I’ll add them and the answers to the FAQ section of this page.
Previous Calamityware plates. If you missed my previous Kickstarter projects, you’ll find a few earlier plates at Calamityware.com. There are some other unusual products there, too, that began as Kickstarter-Don projects.
Want to see more of Don’s drawings? I post a new drawing of something almost every day on Flickr. You can see my preliminary Calamityware sketches and drawings in this Flickr album.
Risks and challenges
Countless things could go wrong to delay this project. But the design is done and the pre-production proofs have been approved. So if I get enough sponsors for a production run, I can green-light production right away.
I’m using a workshop that produces porcelain for monarchs and potentates and has perfected production techniques over 180 years. So technical problems are unlikely. The biggest risk is that production or delivery will take longer than anticipated. In the past, I have had to wait while bigger orders got to go in the kiln ahead of me. That might happen again. But our turn will come eventually.
I promise that I won’t stop working until all my sponsors receive their Calamityware plates. My gloomiest prediction is that we will ship by the end of August 2016. I will try to make it sooner. I’ll give you steady updates all along the way.Learn about accountability on Kickstarter
- (29 days)