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This is a book of proudly immature jokes, that uses double-meaning puns to make ordinary phrases sound dirty.
This is a book of proudly immature jokes, that uses double-meaning puns to make ordinary phrases sound dirty.
42 backers pledged $13,085 to help bring this project to life.

About this project

"But I Hardly Even Know Her" A book of dirty word-play jokes project video thumbnail
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$13,085

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Rubber Chicken? But I hardly even know her!...  Liquor cabinet? But I hardly even know her!... Wurlitzer Organ? But I hardly even know her!

We are three 50-year-old guys who have kept our friendship and our sanity together since junior high school by telling each other raunchy, juvenile jokes like these. We became obsessed with But I Hardly Even Know Her jokes and amassed a long list of them over the years. Recently, we realized these jokes are just too good to keep to ourselves and we decided to try to get them published in a book.

To our great delight, the good folks at Rare Bird Books agreed to be our publisher. The contract is signed and our book will be coming out later this year! Now, we need some extra help to get this proudly immature book the national attention it deserves.

That’s where your donation fits in.

We will direct your donation to promotional mailings to book stores, reviewers and gift catalogs; cooperative advertising with independent book stores; a publishing launch party; trade and publishing industry marketing; publishing support; and production of promotional items (like rubber chicken key chains that say But I Hardly Event Know Her). 

You can be a part of getting this silly, sophomoric book a place in stores, alongside the boring novels, diet books and self-help guides.

Once you get these jokes in your head, you’ll probably find, as we did, that they pop up everywhere. In an airport magazine shop (Consumer Reports?). At a steak restaurant (Worcester sauce?). Watching the Oscars (paparazzi?). Sitting in a doctor’s waiting room (Wicker Basket? Bayer Aspirin? Ranger Rick?).

We want to give our readers a taste of the aha! moments that we enjoyed when we discovered the jokes, so we've presented them as puzzles. You will see a drawing on one page, giving you the chance to try to figure out what phrase it depicts that would fit into the But I Hardly Even Know Her pattern. Then you can flip the page over to see the answer.

But wait...there’s more! We discovered that the male version crops up everywhere, too. Studying Russian history (Boris Yeltsin? Bore his yelts in?) In old TV re-runs (Phyllis Diller?). At a jewelry store (Lapis lazuli?). So we added a bonus section of But I Hardly Even Know HIM jokes. (Bonus section? But I hardly even know him!).

Please join us in bringing immaturity and giggles to this too serious world. 

We thank you from the bottom of our bottoms. Even though we hardly even know you.

Risks and challenges

The biggest challenge that this project faced is already behind us: getting a publishing deal.

Thankfully, our manuscript had the desired effect on the folks at Rare Bird. It caused the corners of their mouths to turn upwards involuntarily and even elicited audible diaphragmatic spasms that sounded like “Ha ha!” and “Tee Hee!” So, we’re over the hardest part.

We will definitely be able to implement the mailings and marketing that we intend, especially with the experience and connections that the team at Rare Bird offers us.

The main risk is that we cannot control the impact of our marketing campaign. Hopefully enough people will have the same reaction that our publisher did and But I Hardly Even Know Her will take off. And when it does, you’ll know you were a part if it!

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  1. Select this reward

    Pledge $25 or more About $25

    SIGNED BOOK: A first edition of But I Hardly Even Know Her, signed by all three authors.

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    Pledge $50 or more About $50

    SIGNED BOOK: A first edition of But I Hardly Even Know Her, signed by all three authors.

    PLUS a miniature rubber chicken on a key chain printed with the phrase "But I Hardly Even Know Her"

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    Pledge $65 or more About $65

    T-SHIRT with a "But I Hardly Even Know Her" drawing on the front.

    PLUS A first edition of But I Hardly Even Know Her, signed by all three authors.

    PLUS a miniature rubber chicken on a key chain printed with the phrase "But I Hardly Even Know Her"

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    Pledge $85 or more About $85

    JOIN THE PARTY: An invitation to attend the launch event. Location TBD (Somewhere in the San Francisco Bay Area)

    A first edition of But I Hardly Even Know Her, signed by all three authors.

    PLUS a miniature rubber chicken on a key chain printed with the phrase "But I Hardly Even Know Her"

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    Pledge $100 or more About $100

    YOUR NAME IN THE BOOK! Get your name listed in the acknowledgements section of the book!

    PLUS A copy of But I Hardly Even Know Her, signed by all three authors.

    PLUS a miniature rubber chicken on a key chain printed with the phrase "But I Hardly Even Know Her"

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    Pledge $125 or more About $125

    FIVE SIGNED COPIES. Autographed by all three authors. Keep one and give four as presents!

    PLUS a miniature rubber chicken on a key chain printed with the phrase "But I Hardly Even Know Her"

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    Pledge $250 or more About $250

    ORIGINAL ARTWORK.
    An actual image used in the book, hand drawn with a sharpie on photo paper. 8.5 x 11 inches. Signed by the artist (C.I.Harris)

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    Pledge $500 or more About $500

    DINNER WITH THE AUTHORS.
    Join all three authors for dinner on the evening of the launch event. Includes an invitation to the launch event - to be held in the San Francisco Bay Area.

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    Pledge $1,000 or more About $1,000

    Executive Platinum Leadership Signature Diamond Class Inner Circle Level.
    This is a special giving level for those who want to make the biggest impact on helping us to reach our goal. If 13 of you give at this level we will reach our goal. The reward will be a personal thank you from all three authors.

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  10. Select this reward

    Pledge $5,000 or more About $5,000

    THE BOOK WILL BE DEDICATED TO YOU!
    A page at the beginning of the book will read "This book is dedicated to (YOUR NAME HERE)" Subject to approval.

    PLUS five copies of But I Hardly Even Know Her, signed by all three authors.

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Funding period

- (30 days)