Funded! This project was successfully funded on September 23, 2012.

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A highly detailed line of miniatures based on the weird and whimsical Low Life game by Andy Hopp (but usable anywhere).

GAZILLIONS of years in the future...

Every possible calamity, cataclysm, apocalypse, and cosmic hangnail has befallen our beloved Mutha Oith during a bygone era known as The Time of The Flush. Now, After the Wipe, the ancient Hoomanrace is extinct and the wobbly orb is wrecked. Oith's current denizens evolved from the lowliest of the low: the resilient roach, the indomitable worm, the everlasting snack cake - the dregs that survived.

It is a time of grand adventure, bold exploration, mighty hocus-pokings, and the occasional hint of whimsical madness; a time of immense struggle, monstrous monstrosities, and remarkable happenstance where even the lowliest worm can become a Keistermeister by his own mop.

Now, by popular demand and the screaming insistence of literally gazillions of clamoring fans, Mutha Oith Creations is proud to announce, in partnership with the formidable Eastern Front Studios, an entire line of (wait for it)...

LOW LIFE MINIATURES!

ANNOUNCEMENT OF THE DAY

(9-22-2012): SMYRT HAPPYTREE UNLOCKED! Only a few hours left, but if we it 60k it will unlock NINE more miniatures for all the Croach with the Moach backers AND I WILL GIVE EVERY BACKER AT $50 or higher a FREE umber cuke miniature!!!!

Oh, and here's Pandalope!

Also, dig this awesome in-progress sculpt of the scarier ass mutha by Alessio. Bad. Ass.

Check out this amazing 3D sculpt for the limited edition werm in a balloon made from an inflated plorp miniature (sculpture by Arun Nagar).

NEW: Any pledge of $50 or more comes with a FREE PDF of both the Low Life Core Rulebook and The Whole Hole! I know, awesome, huh?

The Initial Set

The initial set will include these NINE figures, all done in heroic 30mm scale and ridiculously perfect for all your Low Life adventures or anywhere else dark whimsy is appreciated. You can also earn extra minis by "liking" our official Facebook page. We'll talk about those a bit later on. For now, let's meet the peeps:

Byulunculus the Vigilant: An armored pile who spends his nights goozing around Floom astride his loyal pygmy slog, Orthington, indiscriminately sawing limbs and other bits from bad guys (and the occasional not-so-bad guy). GOAL ATTAINED!

Walloping Krong: A cremefillian from the town of Bottom Saloo, he wields his flaming Dammit Hammer with impunity, crushing all who oppose him or insult his momma's sandwich recipe. GOAL ATTAINED!

Occifer Gleech: This hoink of Torkle weilds his vibrant 'stache and shovel staff to enforce the city's mandates from the Grease Tunnel Turf to the Sock Garter District. Respect his authority. GOAL ATTAINED!

Pandalope the Panderer: A pimpular tizn't from Over There, Pandalope maintains a stable in Floom's The Pits neighborhood, occupying an alley between the Slargleflop and Pickled & Plowed. GOAL ATTAINED!

Unctious Pwoof: A masterful smellcaster from the Garden of Smellemental Glee, Unctious is shown here in mid reek-coalescence. She's mighty mighty. GOAL ATTAINED!

Trozzgoxx the Lobe: Rumored to canoodle with emissaries of the mysterious Primordial Soup Kitchen, Trozzgoxx is a powerful dementalist and celebrated weisenheimer. He also gives great back rubs. GOAL ATTAINED!

Angry Ubgunsker: As a member of the Happy Plate Club, Ubgunsker hopes to leave his mark on history by eradicating every last Thing That Might Not Be. It's good to have a goal. GOAL ATTAINED!

The Guy With The Killin' Stick: He's just a guy with a killin' stick. GOAL ATTAINED!

Mysterious One-Eyed Croach: This wily entrepeneur hangs out in the alley across from The Dive Inn, one of Flooms skeeviest skankatoria. He specializes in healing "diseases of passion" with a sniff of his enormous red finger. GOAL ATTAINED!

The Sockstrosity: This lovely lady was unlocked because we got a buns load of likes on the Low Life Minis facebook page! Goal Attained!

So, there you have the first nine peeps. These are the guys and girls included in the initial set. Below, let's talk about some STRETCH GOALS. These goals add extra value to the original rewards. Come along, I think you'll like them.

Assuming the listed funding level is reached, these goals are rewarded, at no extra charge, to all backers who pledge at the Stench-Wrangling Smelf level and above ($50).

Snells: This two-pack includes a male snell and a female snell, our shell-headed friends introduced in the upcoming book The Whole - A Gadabout's Guide to Mutha Oith - Vol. 01: Keister Island (pdf available now). GOAL ATTAINED!

Ubb Gubertinct: This Fungish smelf enjoys long walks in the fungle, wonking the 'spronge, and harvesting shrooms in the Soul Patch. He's yours FOR FREE if you are backing at a level high enough to earn yourself the STRETCH REWARDS ($50). You guys earned him by completing the "Raise $6000 by 4pm on Monday" Challenge. Way to go! More such challenges will present themselves as the project unfolds. GOAL ATTAINED!

Funguys: Two funguys (a funguy and a fungal) live in this two-pack. How does a peep tell the difference? It's a mystery. GOAL ATTAINED!

Flews: Get it? Their ancestors were flies but these guys don't have wings, so they're known as flews. HA! Anyway, two of them, a lad and a lass, are included. GOAL ATTAINED!

If these STRETCH GOALS are met we'll cast the first set of nine in pewter instead of resin (assuming we can still get the necessary detail) AND they'll all have decorative bases. Not only that, I'll write up detailed character sheets and backgrounds for these guys and make them available in PDF format.

Those are the so-called STRETCH GOALS. The following listings are the SNAZZY GOALS. They are included, as long as their relevant funding level is attained, with all backing rewards of the Wistful Oofo Dementalist level and above ($75).

The Sockstrosity: This lovely lady was unlocked because we got a buns load of likes on the Low Life Minis facebook page! Goal Attained!

Coblins: These enormous ears of what passes for corn hail from the land of Glowhio, where gazillions of years of nukular radiation have brought them sentience and other fancy jazz. GOAL ATTAINED

Scarier Ass Mutha: Far scarier than regular scary ass muthas, these guys are ferocious, vile, and just downright mean. I'm not sure what he's so angry about, but it's probably something you did. GOAL ATTAINED!

Umber Cuke: Befuddling beasts of the Underwhere, these voracious predators dig munching the bones of innocent gadabouts. GOAL ATTAINED!

Glutenous Maximus: This cremefillian gladiator is one of the gnarliest chin-choppers the Scrappin' Hole's ever seen. GOAL ATTAINED!

Lichenthrope: Once this guy was just a simple werm, but then the villainous mosses of Stan's Rug did their thang and he's all goosed up. GOAL ATTAINED!

Werm ...of the Danged: Poor guy. It's not polite to stare. GOAL ATTAINED!

The Boss of Lunch: You guys unlocked him and his friends by funding the Werm ...of the Danged by lunchtime on Friday. Why not unlock the Corpulent Sludge posthaste? That is, after all what the Boss of Lunch makes his sandwiches out of. GOAL ATTAINED!

Hot Dammit: This little fellow tagged along with the Boss of Lunch because Steven asked for it. I don't know, maybe he cooks the sandwiches or something. These guys also fuel Walloping Krong's dammit hammer, so there's that. Two hot dammits are included in the set. GOAL FREAKIN' ATTAINED!

Shloorp: These unpleasant goosers lurk in the marshy Scum Quag (and other squishy places) just waiting to slurp the fluids from some hapless wanderer. No straw required. GOAL ATTAINED!

Corpulent Sludge: These vaguely upright masses of gelatinous sludge roam many of Oith's danker realms. GOAL ATTAINED!

Halving the Likes: I halved the needed likes needed for the free minis on the Low Life Minis Facebook page because you unlocked the Corpulent Sludge by Monday. GOAL ATTAINED!

Blue Hiney: You unlocked Blue Hiney and his glub by getting a whole bunch of likes on the Low Life minis facebook page. GOAL ATTAINED!

That's it for SNAZZY GOAL REWARDS. Let's now turn our attention to the ULTIMATE SUPER ULTRA MEGA REWARDS, which are included at no extra charge for all backers at the Hunky Horcish Hate-monger level ($100).

Queen Mutha: She's big, She's bad. She pukes her own offspring and she's not going to take any guff from the likes of you, mister. The queen mutha comes with an assortment of regular scary ass muthas. GOAL ATTAINED!

Zub Trooxle: Fresh from a hunting excursion in Stan's Rug, this wily oofo enjoys long walks in the scuzz and hacking the beaks from ferocious mosstriches. GOAL ATTAINED!

Uuulon Crepulos: Floom's most powerful contanimator stomps the streets astride his trusty, rusty, about-to-busty, contanimatronic minion. This is another BIG figure. GOAL ATTAINED!

Oily Nad: You unlocked this ingenious contanimant weirdo by unlocking Uuulon Crepulos by noon on Wednesday. GOAL ATTAINED!

F'reek: The hideous and stench-ridden result of smellcasting gone drastically wrong (in a bad way). GOAL ATTAINED!

Blor-porple: That's the sound it makes when they rip out a peep's intestines. These cute little guys suck real bad. Stay away and never, ever, let your sister date one. GOAL ATTAINED!

Scentipede: The not-quite hideous and stench-ridden result of smellcasting gone drastically wrong (in a good way). GOAL ATTAINED!

That's about it for the ULTIMATE SUPER ULTRA MEGA GOALS. As an added bonus, everyone who backs at the Croach with the Moach level will nab a FREE POSTER featuring many of the images upon which these minis are based. Wanna know about the HOLY CRAP GOALS? I thought you might...

HOLY CRAP REWARDS will be unlocked when we hit $30,000. They are awarded, free of additional charge, to peeps backing at the Croach with the Moach level and above ($150).

Halving the Likes Again: If we unlock the Scentipede by Breakfast on Monday September 17 I will halve the number of likes needed to earn the free minis on the Low Life Minis facebook page. This will bring us Blue Hiney and get us dangerously close to the Bollz and Allopecia two pack. GOAL ATTAINED

Rhed'boq Q'ol: Q'ol is a hardcore holy roller who digs espousing the virtues of Great Cornthulhu and cracking the kernels of heretics with his mighty club of mightiness. He'll be offered as a Holy Crap reward if we reach $30,000 by breakfast on Friday September 14. This will officially open the Holy Crap Goals. GOAL ATTAINED!

Sunny Hindquarters: This pimpin' smelf rules the roost at The Dive Inn, a strumpet-infested den of crud and iniquity in Floom's Mongerblocks turf. GOAL ATTAINED!

Another Blor-Porple?: Yep, another blor-porple. Heck, make it THREE MORE BLOR-PORPLES because you're awesome. GOAL ATTAINED!

Tenemental: As the Fundamental spirit of substandard housing, this horrid contanimant is a GOOSIN' HUGE MINIATURE! It even includes Tomethrower Feelth, the pile hoink down there in the corner. GOAL ATTAINED!

Clamsack the Corpulent: As Principal Broker of the Bottomliners, Clamsack believes his vast wealth makes him the holiest peep in Floom. He excurses daily from his mansion atop the Vault of Revenuvial Affluence astride his loyal stomp and accompanied by a fluffy show slog and a burger-carrying servant of some sort. GOAL ATTAINED!

Halving the Likes AGAIN!: If we reach at least $42,000 I will halve the number likes needed to get the free minis on the Low Life minis facebook page yet again. This will nab us the Bollz and Allopecia 2-pack with interchangable weapons and possibly some others. GOAL ATTAINED!

Plorp: This is another BIG miniature. It comes complete with a rider and a view of the road. GOAL ATTAINED!

Cremefillian War Party: You asked for so I hastily drew it. The war party will include AT LEAST four different cremefillian warriors, most likely decked in the duds of a Jemimah's Witness. Goal Attained!

Hamster: It's a hamster. GOAL ATTAINED!

Smyrt Happytree: Brian Harriman won the Amazingly Amazing Low Life Miniatures Character Design Contest with this fantastic character! GOAL ATTAINED!

His words: The Pthalites are a sect of the Church of Rob, who consider the current woes of Mutha Oith to be just another happy little accident (or at least another happy large accident)that can be fixed with a little effort, while the more militant believers of the Alizarinite sect would rather just paint a happy bush over it all and let it be our little secret" Appearance: a croach daubed with (Pthalo) blue paint, wearing a fake afro (that's inhabited by whatever passes for squirrels in post-wipe oith) plus a matching fake beard, dressed in robes that resemble a painters smock, (possibly with room for a soothing mountain scene on the back) and wielding a stave that resembles a large paintbrush. He should also seem way to cheerful for his own good. (assuming it's even possible to give a croach that kind of expression).

Squiggins Neverlost: This intrepid gadabout is a werm with class. He knows his way around just bout everywhere. If you see him, tell him I said "It's in your back pocket." He'll know what I mean.

Cute Little Duckies: You asked for them and here they are. One of Mutha Oith's cutest little eviscerators. This set includes two cute little duckies and a ravaged corpse.

The Garden of Smellmental Glee Awesomeness Pack: This set comes with THREE smelven monks of the Garden AND a Croach riding some sort of contanimatronic device (as featured in The Whole Hole).

Halving the Likes AGAIN!: If we reach at least $60,000 I will halve the number likes needed to get the free minis on the Low Life minis facebook page yet again. This will nab us the Sphincs.

Uncter: HUGE! This enormous two-headed croach-like beast is a true bad ass. I DARE you to unlock him.

What's next?

We will add one new character or monster to the HOLY CRAP GOALS for every $3000 (character or small monster) or $5000 (large monster) raised beyond $70,000. Who or what will it be? That's up to you. Send us a message and let us know what you want.

Limited Edition Karmasuturist Tizn't

This is a SNEAK PEEK at a character from Holy Crap, the upcoming Low Life book that details the various faiths of Mutha Oith. It is limited to 100 castings and can be yours for only $50 or by adding $40 to an existing pledge of $50 or more. It should be roughly 35mm tall. It comes with a signed and numbered art print of the character.

Limited Edition Great Cornthulhu

BEHOLD! GREAT CORNTHULHU! Only 100 of this signed and numbered beast will EVER be made available and he can be yours for only $110 or by adding just $100 to your current pledge. You can have him for $90 if you also nabbed the mutant land fish and the plorp balloon. He's HUGE (over a foot tall)!

Limited Edition Mutant Land Fish

Cremefillian Riding a Mutant Land Fish: We are very excited to offer this limited edition cremefillian riding a mutant land fish miniature. This figure will be limited to only 100 castings and each numbered set will include a signed and personalized art print and a pile of dead fish.Only 80 will be available through this kickstarter (50 to add to existing rewards and 30 singulars) so nab one while they last. You can get one by adding $45 to any existing pledge or, if he's all you want, you can back at the cremefillian on a mutant land fish level.

Limited Edition Plorp Balloon

Werm in a Balloon made out of an Inflated Plorp: This really big miniature is a special, limited edition figure that will ONLY be available to the first 30 people who back at the $199 level. A further 20 will be available to anyone who adds $60 to any other existing level. Only 100 will be EVER made. Each one will come numbered and signed with a personalized art print by Andy Hopp. I'm told that sort of thing is something of a big deal.

"Like" our official Facebook page and earn FREE MINIS!!!

Here's how...
Help us spread the word and gain yourself some really nifty Low Life minis in the process. For each of the following milestones we'll offer an extra miniature, for FREE, to everyone who pledges at the required level. So spout the gab to all your friends, be they larva or geeze, "Hey everyone, this thing is likable!"

117 Likes (Stench-Wrangling Smelf - $50): The Sockstrocity GOAL ATTAINED!
238 Likes (Wistful Oofo Dementalist - $75): Blue Hiney and Glub GOAL ATTAINED!
438 Likes (Hunky Horcish Hate-monger - $100): Allopecia and Bollz 2-pack GOAL ATTAINED!
613 Likes (Croach with the Moach - $150): Werm in Two Parts GOAL ATTAINED!
1117 Likes (Croach with even more of the Moach - $175): Sphincs

A Few Questions You May Have:

What about shipping?
Shipping to the contiguous United States is included in the price of the backing rewards. International orders please add $10.

What is Low Life?

Low Life is a roleplaying game setting produced by Andy Hopp and published by Pinnacle Entertainment Group and Mutha Oith Creations. It has been critically and publicly acclaimed for its uniqueness, originality, and artwork. The most recent book, The Whole Hole, will be in stores soon, as will Dementalism, the first Low Life card game. You can nab pdfs of some Low Life products here and the hardbound core book and other jazz is available here.

Banners!

Feel free to nab any of the preceding banners and post them anywhere such things are welcome. Thanks a gazillion. Any exposure is appreciated. Please link them to this site: http://www.kickstarter.com/projects/1359565526/low-life-miniatures

Limited Edition Availability Tally Matrix Index Indicator Combobulator Thingy

Great Cornthulhu: # available: 30
Mutant Land Fish: # available: 16
Plorp Balloon: # available: 14
Karmasuturist: # available: 35

FAQ

Have a question? If the info above doesn't help, you can ask the project creator directly.

Ask a question
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    14 backers

    Pincher of Clams: This level is for peeps running their own kickstarter campaign who just want to make it look like they are backing a lot of projects but don't have a huge budget for such things. It's also for peeps who genuinely want to help, but don't have the clams for a higher reward. You gain the people's ovation and fame forever, also our eternal gratitude.

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    Surprise Me!: You'll nab one random miniature from the assortment. What will it be? It's in the hands of the gawds now...

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    17 backers

    Stinking Pile of Filth: You will receive your choice of ONE miniature from the initial set of nine.

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    Dingy Cremefillian Scum: You can nab TWO minis of your choice from the initial nine.

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    Book Werm: This option gets you just the hardcover Low Life core rulebook, signed and personalized, and no miniatures. Alternately, you can add $30 to any other pledge to add the book to another reward.

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    Being of Dubious Lineage: You'll slunk away with FOUR minis from the initial set of nine, but seriously, at this point you might as well fork over the fifty clams for the whole set. That's what the Bottomliners call "Using your noodle."

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    Other Book Werm: This reward nabs you a signed and personalized copy of the hardcover Low Life book The Whole Hole - A Gadabout's Guide to Mutha Oith - Volume 01: Keister Island. It's 228 pages of Low Lifey goodness. You can add $30 to any other pledge to add the book to another reward.

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    Discombobulated Tizn't: Will anyone choose this level, in which they receive FIVE minis? Maybe, although it makes more sense to chip in another ten clams and take advantage of the amazing deals offered at the next level.

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    31 backers

    Stench-Wrangling Smelf: At this level you nab unto yourself the ENTIRE SET of NINE minis! That's quite a bargain! Exclamation point! Also, you'll gain access to the STRETCH GOAL REWARDS (which may include six extra minis, pewter casting, decorative bases, illustrated character sheets, sweet sweet lovin', and other keen jazz).

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    Karmasuturist: Backers at this level nab the Limited Edition Karmasuturist Tizn't. That guy can also be had by adding $40 to any other pledge of $50 or more.

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    Cremefillian on a Mutant Land Fish: This is for peeps who only want the limited edition Cremefillian on a Mutant Land Fish miniature. If you'd like other stuff too, please add $45 to any pledge and you'll nab yourself one of these fancy, extremely limited miniatures.

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    More Artsy than Fartsy: You get your choice of one miniature from the initial set of nine EXPERTLY PAINTED by a professional miniatures painter. You can add $50 to any reward level to have one of your character-sized minis painted.

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    4 backers Limited (96 left of 100)

    Ultimate Book Werm: You don't get any miniatures with this option, but you gain yourself signed and personalized copies of both the Low Life core rulebook and The Whole Hole. Add 60 clams to any other pledge to add both books to another reward.

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    Werm in a Balloon Made out of an Inflated Plorp: This is for peeps who only want the Werm in a Balloon Made out of an Inflated Plorp limited edition miniature. If you'd like other stuff too, please add $60 to any other pledge. This guys is almost sold out of the original 50, so nab one before it's too late.

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    24 backers

    Wistful Oofo Dementalist: You get the set of NINE minis, access to the STRETCH GOAL REWARDS and access to the SNAZZY GOAL REWARDS (here's where some badass Low Life monsters get added to the mix. That makes for a total of 15 character minis and up to 6 monstrous monstrosities).

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    3 backers

    Not-so-lowly Werm: Here's something for the ladies. Also for the men. Not only will you nab yourself everything a Wistful Oofo Dementalist gets, you'll also slink off with a hardbound, full-color copy of The Whole Hole - A Gadabout's Guide to Mutha Oith - Volume 01: Keister Island (retail: $29.95).

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    15 backers

    Hunky Horcish Hate-monger: At this level you gather unto yourself the original set of nine minis, access to all of the STRETCH GOAL and SNAZZY GOAL REWARDS and you gain access to the ULTIMATE SUPER ULTRA MEGA REWARDS (even more monsters, including the incredibly huge Uuulon Crepulos and the Queen Mutha multi-pack). Never since The Time of the Flush has a deal of this magnitude been offered to the Hoomanrace.

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    Great Cornthulhu: This is for peeps who only want the limited edition Great Cornthulhu miniature.You can also nab Cornthulhu by adding $100 to any other pledge of ten clams or more.

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    FIRST!: You get the same rewards as a Croach with the Moach, but you get to save five clams because you signed up first. Way to show some initiative, sport.

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    88 backers

    Croach with the Moach: Now we're getting serious. At this level, brace yourself, you get ALL OF THE EVERYTHING! You nab the original nine minis and access to the STRETCH GOAL REWARDS, SNAZZY GOAL REWARDS, ULTIMATE SUPER ULTRA MEGA REWARDS, and the just announced HOLY CRAP REWARDS!!!! That's a possible haul upwards of fifty miniatures, along with character sheets, decorative bases, posters, and all sorts of other jazz! Can you believe it? Neither can I, but it's true.

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    10 backers

    Croach With Even More of the Moach: Although I still don't know what a moach is, even more of it means you get everything the Croach with the Moach gets and you also get a hardbound, full-color copy of The Whole Hole - A Gadabout's Guide to Mutha Oith - Volume 01: Keister Island (retail: $29.95) OR a copy of the Dementalism card game (retail: $19.95).

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    1 backer

    Waremonger's Delight: This level is intended for retailers so they can hop in on the madness. You nab FIVE sets of the original nine minis AND access to all the STRETCH, SNAZZY, ULTIMATE, and HOLY CRAP rewards.

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    5 backers

    Croach With the Most Moach: You get everything the Croach with the Moach gets and you also get a hardbound, full-color copy of The Whole Hole - A Gadabout's Guide to Mutha Oith - Volume 01: Keister Island (retail: $29.95) AND a copy of the Dementalism card game (retail: $19.95).

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    30 backers All gone!

    Werm in a Balloon made out of an Inflated Plorp: You get all the things a Croach with the Moach gets AND you also get the special, LIMITED EDITION werm in a balloon miniature. This mini is limited to 100 total models and the only way to get one of the first 50, numbered, signed, and personalized along with a full color art print is to back at this level or to add 60 clams to any other level. This is kind of a big deal, apparently.

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    7 backers

    Waremonger's Delight 2 (The Revenge): It's just like the Waremonger's Delight except you get TEN boxed sets instead of five.

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    0 backers Limited (20 left of 20)

    More Fartsy Than Artsy: You get the original set of nine minis, all of which are expertly hand-painted by a professional miniatures painter.

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    0 backers

    Waremonger's Delight 3: This includes every gawds-danged thing in the Waremonger's Delight 2 reward AND all four limited edition minis (the plorp balloon, Cornthulhu, the Karmasuturist, the cremefillian riding a giant mutant land fish.

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    2 backers Limited (18 left of 20)

    Equal Parts Artsy and Fartsy: You get everything a Croach with the Moach gets but your original set of nine minis is expertly hand-painted by a professional miniatures painter.

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    0 backers Limited (1 left of 1)

    Mutant Land Fish A(fish)ianado: Whoever nabs this reward, which can alternatively be had by adding $400 to any other reward of $50 or more, gets the original Full color drawing of the Cremefillian Riding a Mutant Land Fish, signed and personalized by Andy (Prismacolor pencils on archival Bristol paper).

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    17 backers Limited (33 left of 50)

    ALL THE MINIS EVER!: You will get every non-limited Low Life miniature ever made by Mutha Oith Creations and Eastern Front Studios. You will get the limited edition minis offered with this kickstarter, but not ones offered in the future. You'll also get free pdf copies of the Low Life core rulebook and The Whole Hole.

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    2 backers

    Bottomliner: Here's an awesome way to impress your friends. You'll get everything a Croach with the Moach gets (I have no idea what a moach is) AND I (Andy Hopp, at your service) will work with you to create a Low Life character of your own design. This character will be featured in an upcoming Low Life book and WILL BE MADE INTO A MINIATURE, five copies of which you will receive. For an extra $200 you'll get a personalized copy of whatever book it appears in AND the original full-color drawing. My accountant is going to devour me alive for offering such an insane bargain...

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    1 backer All gone!

    The Q'ol of Cornthulhu: Whoever nabs this reward (you can alternately add $600 to another reward of $50+) gets the original full color drawings of both Great Cornthulhu and Rhed'boq Q'ol (Prismacolor pencil on archival Bristol paper). Each picture will be signed and personalized by the arteest (that's me, Andy).

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    The Personal Touch: Not that kind of personal touch (we'll talk later). I (Andy) will personally travel to your home, game store, or abandoned school bus in the desert and hand deliver everything you are entitled to as a Croach with the Moach. I'll hang out overnight, treat you to dinner, and play games with you all weekend (unless you get sick of me and want me to leave early). Please add $500 if you live more than 500 miles from Akron, Ohio. International peeps please add $1000 (unless you live in Canada and are less than 500 miles away).

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    Uppity Snoot: You'll get everything a Croach with the Moach gets (again, unclear about the whole moach thing), but it's ALL PAINTED (except the Tenemental)! That's absolutely correct: every miniature (but one) will be expertly painted by a professional painter and sent giggling into your eager hands (well, your eager mailbox first, then into your eager hands). This is potentially a bunsload of work, so it's quite a bargain. If you have the means I highly recommend you avail yourself of this service. Please add $300 if you want your Tenemental painted as well. That thing is huge.

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    Keistermeister: You get everything. Absolutely everything. Even that. You nab yourself one copy of every non-exclusive product Mutha Oith Creations ever produces. All the books, miniatures (except limited editions), games, and assorted whatnots. You also get in free to the amazing Con on the Cob (www.cononthecob.com) FOREVER! All the cool kids are doing it.

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    Uppitier Snoot: You'll get everything a Croach with even more of the Moach gets (again, unclear about the whole moach thing), but it's ALL PAINTED (EVEN the Tenemental)! You also get all the limited edition minis AND THOSE ARE PAINTED TOO! Fwoo, I need to calm down. I'm gonna have a heart attack.

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    Always a Gawdfather Never a Gawd: No longer. You will be an actual gawd. Not only will you get everything a Croach with the Moach gets, I (Andy) will create a cult dedicated to espousing the virtues of you. I'll build a shrine in my backyard, set up a you-worshipping website, and host a worship service at Con on the Cob (to which you will receive free entry until the end of time, whenever you decide that is).

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    Ding of the Dong: Now you're rolling with the guys who wear the big wigs. You get one of EVERYTHING ever produced by Mutha Oith Creations and/or Eastern Front Studios. This could potentially be thousands of products. I know it seems like a lot of clams, but what price can you put on ALL OF THE EVERYTHING EVER?

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    The Ghost of My Rich Uncle: You get everything the Ding of the Dong gets, you also get The Personal Touch and the Werm in a Balloon and you get to brag to your friends and minions about how you spent 10,000 clams on something you could have nabbed for 5500. That's just how you roll. It's about clout, not math.

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    Benevolent and Anonymous Hocus Poker: This is for that certain someone who just wants to fund the whole dang thing all by himself (or herself). You get everything that all of the other rewards get, including the Personal Touch, all the limited edition minis, the whole MOC and EFS catalogue, the cult, and EVERYTHING PAINTED. You also get a personalized, one-of-a-kind completely custom 300 page full-color coffee table art book that follows my career over the past 12 years (even old stuff that sucks). I'll also be your best friend and everyone will love you even more than they already do (which, I am forced to assume, is whole heck of a lot because you're awesome).

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Funding period

- (30 days)