About
BY POPULAR REQUEST, ENEMY WEAPON IS NOW RED. ALL HAIL THE GLORIOUS CRIMSON TINT OF KINGS.
ENEMY WEAPON is a card-based party game for 3+ players, where you and your fellow players will be engaging in a series of epic battles, facing off against a variety of enemies:
To aid in your fight, you'll have access to an assortment of legendary weapons. Each round you must examine your arsenal closely, and choose the artifact or special power most capable of vanquishing the current foe. For instance:
With weapon in hand, each player must weave their own tale of glorious battle, arguing that they alone possess the tool necessary to defeat the enemy. However, only the warrior who presents the most unique (and hilarious) plan of attack will earn the favor of the almighty judge, and claim victory.
Warrior, the time has come for you to abandon the tired distractions of lesser men. Steel your resolve, summon your courage, and prepare your butthole for the glory of ENEMY WEAPON.
In ENEMY WEAPON there are two types of cards:
ENEMY cards are scenarios, detailing the foe you're tasked with defeating and the conditions for victory.
WEAPON cards are devices and special powers, the tools you'll use to defeat the enemies you'll be fighting against.
In ENEMY WEAPON there is no "correct" answer. Each enemy has a number of potential weaknesses, and each weapon can be utilized in a variety of ways.
For instance, maybe you'll turn the child molestation robot's horrible chrome penis into a vagina, so he can no longer penetrate his victims. Maybe you'll use the reverse gas chamber to bring Jesus back to life, the presence of the divine causing your homophobic father to weep himself into a grave. The choice is yours! Examine each card closely, and come up with a solution worthy of the judge's favor!
At the beginning of the game, shuffle both the enemy and weapon decks, then deal each player five weapon cards. Randomly determine who will be the first judge.
The judge then flips over the top card of enemy deck: revealing the foe the players will be facing this round. After a period of deliberation, each player then chooses one of their weapon cards with which to do battle.
If playing with a small group: Everybody joins the battle.
If playing with your idiot cousin Steve and his entire adult dodgeball team: Everyone hands their weapon card (face-down) to the judge. The judge reads the cards aloud, then picks three of them. The owners of those weapons join the battle.
All participants in the battle then take turns explaining how they will use their chosen weapon to defeat the enemy. Do note that ENEMY WEAPON is not a polite scholarly debate. This is verbal warfare! Argue the merit of your chosen weapon, while trash-talking the pitiful armaments of your opponents. Poke holes in the flimsy stories other players have presented, while defending the obvious brilliance of your own battle plan.
The judge then decides which player has made the most convincing case for victory.
VERY IMPORTANT NOTE: If you are the current judge, you should not reward the most obvious solution, but the most creative one. Identify which player has come up with a truly interesting, unique or hilarious battle plan, and grant them the victory they deserve.
The winning player is handed the defeated enemy card to represent their victory. Everybody draws a new weapon card, and the role of the judge passes to the next player in line.
The first player to claim three victories wins the game and the title of ULTIMATE CHAMPION!
(You may then choose to ritually sacrifice the ultimate champion, though this is not required).
Each copy of the game comes with 75 unique enemy cards and 225 unique weapon cards. T-shirts are available in sizes S - XXXL, with two different designs available to choose from (Vito / Logo). Shirt designs are subject to change.
For complete details of each tier, read the descriptions in the sidebar.
(NOTE: We know that the price for international shipping is currently a bit pricey. If this Kickstarter begins to perform well, we'll be able to lock in with an overseas fulfillment company and bring those costs down before the campaign ends. If you are an potential overseas backer, do bookmark our page and check back).
Let's be honest: it isn't a real Kickstarter unless you get a bunch of sweet bonus swag to gleefully lord over those filthy commoners who missed out on the campaign. That's why the creator of ENEMY WEAPON is happy to announce that everyone who backs at the Bonus Tier (and above) will get the Kickstarter exclusive ENEMY HITLER expansion pack.
In addition, once the campaign reaches it's funding target, stretch goals will add even more free cards to your copy of the game. You'll also get any cards designed by people who pledge the Weaponsmith / Villain tiers.
So uh... maybe reach out to your friends with a link to the campaign? The more people who back this project, the more free stuff you get. Not a bad deal!
Hello potential backer! My name is Vito Gesualdi, and I'm a comedian / crazy person obsessed with card games. You may know me as:
- The former Editor-in-Chief of DraftMagic.com
- The lead graphic designer of Star Realms (SXSW's Tabletop Game of The Year)
- That idiot on YouTube who ran around Berkeley handing out cans of Pepsi to rioters
I like to make people laugh, which is why I've spent over a year carefully designing this game in the hopes of doing just that. Also in the hopes that I will make enough money to afford a sweet jetski.
Look at how sweet that thing is. These two people are probably the happiest couple alive and I bet they have awesome sex every night because they are so amped up thinking about all their jetski adventures.
This is the life I want to live.
Anyway, if you like to laugh (and you want me to have a jetski), please consider supporting my game!
I have a feeling you're gonna like it.
Risks and challenges
This is my first Kickstarter as a solo creator, but I have personally worked on more than a half-dozen major campaigns. While I've seen plenty of success stories, I've also seen creators who get far too ambitious with their promised rewards and fulfillment dates, leading to some very disappointed backers.
I will not be making the same mistakes.
Though ENEMY WEAPON is 100% ready for print, I have purposefully set the fulfillment date in 2019, so that I can devote time to making sure you receive a product of the highest-possible quality. I'm ordering sample printings to make sure you don't receive a bunch of flimsy cards with ink smears. I'm running additional rounds of playtesting to ensure that every card is both fun, challenging, and easy for players to understand. Though this means the game won't be stuffing your holiday stockings, the tradeoff is a quality game you'll be proud to have on your shelf.
I solemnly pledge to deliver the glory of ENEMY WEAPON into your hands, and to make it the most exciting, unique, and hilarious game it can be.
Please, believe in me.
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