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Set in the badlands of the Mojave, Sweetpea is about a chase, a pearl-handled revolver, and 2 outlaws with a complicated relationship.
Created by

Emma Coats

225 backers pledged $16,017 to help bring this project to life.

Writing, rewriting - it can always be better

One of the thank-you gifts (at the $250 level) is a script + storyboard book. I want to talk a little bit about the script stage, since we're starting to move into storyboards now. 

It's a lot easier to rewrite a scene than to redraw it, so it's in your best interests to work out as much as you can in writing. This is the time to explore where the story might go, to burn down a house, to send an entire posse out on screen... it's much easier to get the idea across quickly.

Dialogue goes faster, too. You talk to yourself and write it down (or write it down and then talk to yourself), find what works and what doesn't, redo it, strip it down to its beats and pad it back up into something people would actually say.

When it comes to the subtle poetic stuff, though... both myself and Shion are storyboard artists. There are some times where you know how it's going to play, and you can draw the shot and the expression and the camera move, and you can explain it to someone, too- but it's hard to find the precise words to get that feeling on the page. In storyboards though - we can make it sing.

We're getting close with the script, although it probably won't be 100% done until the film is edited. There's always some way to make it better... but what we're working with is already pretty damn good.

See below: just a fraction of the pages we've gone through, marked up, written over... and the pristine 7th draft.

  • Image 62738 original

Comments

    1. Creator Rochelle Nanette Germano on September 5, 2011

      Rewrites are where all the magic happens, good luck, much inspiration!