who: nate denver
what: a new beautiful book of 50-word stories and drawings called HAUNTED ARMOR with a nate denver's neck CD tucked in the back.
where: over there
why: good question
the plan: to make 2000 books and sell them in the most delightful stores ever created.
see rewards at http://natedenver.tumblr.com/archive
i'm open to reward suggestions...if there's merch you don't see or if you'd like to challenge me to a freestyle/actual battle...i'm here.
Welcome. I have written fifty new 50-word stories and drawn a bunch of new drawings. They will be collected in a high quality, heavy paper, display worthy tome. The drawings look like the best drawings. The stories are each exactly 50-words long and read like this,
The attic and the basement were in love. They exchanged letters and promises of devotion, but try as they might, they couldn’t touch. Save for their love, life was torture. They knew their only hope for contact was a wild giant swinging his axe through the floor that divided them.
One warm Saturday, Mozart walked into the street and saw a small cat running up a tree. He said “Hey Frank! How’d you do that?” and the cat ran along a branch and jumped onto a rooftop. Amazed Mozart muttered “Jesus Christ. Frank’s a goddamned maniac. I didn’t know that.”
Centaurs rarely cry. It’s not that they don’t have feelings, they’re just preoccupied with annihilating evil. When centaurs do cry, it is a beautiful, but painful occurrence during which they think of every awful or sad thing they’ve ever experienced. By the time they’re old, crying can take a year.
With this kickstarter page I aim to raise money to print and distribute this second book. By pledging $20, you will help the book to be born and receive a copy of the book when it comes out. You are pre-ordering the book. Wonderful. The goal will be reached if 500 wonderful people each pledge $20 or if one weird guy pledges all the money.
note: this book will be laid out by the magnificent johnathan schuster of AESTHETIC APPARATUS, the same gentleman who laid out, Wait, you’re not a centaur. http://aestheticapparatus.com/
note: this book is illegible to scoundrels.
note: europeans and other strange creatures are welcome, you will just pay a bit extra in shipping.
History of the first book. A long time ago, a gentleman from LA asked multiple musicians to write a 50-word story for a compilation he was making. I did this and enjoyed the format, so I did it over and over again until I had seventy stories. The stories were so heavy that they were breaking the foundation of my house and I had to get them out of the structure. I sent them to Zak Sally of La Mano21 and he put them in a book called, Wait, you’re not a centaur. (see ...centaur at lamano21.com amazon.com and natedenver.com
The first pressing of the first book had a errant apostrophe in the first word of the first story. That apostrophe filled me with so much rage that I detonated. Then I reassembled. Despite the apostrophe, Wait, you're not a centaur sold out immediately thereby wealthifying Mr Sally and me. We did a second pressing in our new fortress and it too is gone, may it rest in peace. This new book will have zero errant apostrophes.
Writing with restrictions is good.
Thank you for your support and good luck with everything.
Here's one more story,
When Nietzsche told Wagner they could no longer be friends, Wagner had to know why. Nietzsche told him, “It’s not me, it’s you. You’re mind is a decrepid weakling while my mind is a vigorous part-lion part-man hybrid built for killing.” Wagner went home and began plagarizing Tolkien's future masterpiece.
here's a song called GRAVESTONE CARVER
- (32 days)