We’re talking inappropriate.
We’re talking so bad it's good.
We’re talking ‘oh-my-god-my-eyes-can’t-unread-that.’
The University of Queensland Writers’ Club presents: 50 Shades of Awkward.
Meet the sewer worker that helps clean a lost man’s pipes. Shudder at the Sea Captain with an unhealthy obsession for Octopus. Laugh at heaving bosoms and throbbing love members… but then wash your hands afterwards, because it all feels just a little bit wrong.
So tell me about this book.
Remember when you had a fantasy about that thing and would be totally embarrassed if anyone found out?
Remember how you've always wondered what it would be like?
Remember how you got caught in the bedroom when you were 13 and your mother had to have the talk with you?
This book is a reminder of those times.
50 Shades of Awkward is a collective effort by the UQ Writers' Club to write a book of short, awkward, love stories. These are stories that on purpose will make the reader cringe - through either content, characters, or purposely bad writing.
This book is not erotica, but is about love and sex. It is suggestive but is not graphic. Think ‘heat-seeking love missile’ as opposed to ‘hard rigid penis’ (can we say that on Kickstarter? I guess we'll find out).
Some tales are light and funny, others are dark and disturbing. Some touch on love like a whimsical fairy might alight on a delicate petal. Others treat sex like a sledgehammer pounds jelly. Each author brings their own unique talents, writing style and direction to the vision that this book has become.
"50 Shades of Awkward is…awkward, but also funny, quirky, original, sexy, and wicked. I dare you to dip in!"
- Anna Campbell, bestselling author
Featuring: Sea men! Prostitutes! Really hairy people! Daleks (Ejaculate! Ejaculate! Exterminate your clothing)! Demons! Mothers (or is that the same thing)? Alleyways! Affairs in the library! Best friends! Best enemies! An itch downstairs, and more!
Awkward disclaimer: You should probably be an adult to read these stories. Although it may seem like a good idea at the time to buy this for someone in elementary school, their parents probably won't get the joke. And they will probably not appreciate having to give their kid the talk... five years early.
Do you guys have pre-released content?
Regular books just give you one story. Can you believe it? Talk about crap value for money. In this book, you'll get fifty cringetastic stories! Want a sneak peek at what you're in for? Check out four stories right here absolutely free!
- In The Shade of a Close Encounter, a UFO enthusiast gets probed in all the wrong places when he gets a close encounter of the very awkward kind. Featuring throat tentacles!
- In The Shade of a Tunnel, a lonely sewer worker finds more than she bargains for under the city streets. Things get all hot and steamy as she cleans pipes and releases pressure!
- In Fifty Shades of Yo Mama, our heroine wakes in a bed of rose petals, sour cream and melted cheese to find a re-enactment of losing her virginity has gone horribly wrong. This one is based on a true story. Yep.
- In The Shade of White Bodily Fluid, a curious young man discovers himself while alone in the bathroom. “And there it was, staring back at him from the mirror. It was beautiful. It was giant. It was deep crimson.” It's not what you think.
There’s 46 more stories just like this in our book 50 Shades of Awkward. They can’t all be bad… or can they?
What is the UQ Writers' Club?
UQ Writers' Club is affiliated with The University of Queensland in Brisbane, Australia (whether they want it or not). We're a collection of students and occasional randoms who have banded together through love of literature to support each other and create a fun and engaging environment where everyone is welcome. We edit each other's work, we get guest speakers, we go to writing festivals. You know, cool stuff like that.
How was this project started?
The idea for this book was born during a writing marathon. We set ourselves the task of writing a really awkward love story. We had so much fun doing it (and the results were so hilarious) that we decided to try and make it a full blown project. We're all budding writers; some of us have been published, but for most of us 50 Shades of Awkward will be our first venture into the world of authorship!
What will the Kickstarter fund go towards?
Most of the funds will go towards printing, binding, and posting the first edition of the 50 Shades of Awkward paperbacks. Anything left over will go towards club-related activities such as sponsoring members for entry to writing festivals, writing workshops, and for guest authors to talk to us. Through these activities, we hope to inspire a new generation of creative writers. It's money for a good cause and an even better laugh!
What Kickstarter Exclusive Deals can I score?
As a thank you for all your support on this project, we're offering the chance to score a series of deals Exclusive to Kickstarter:
- Being listed as a backer in our cat stroking video
- Your name immortalised forever in our book as a backer.
- Bragging rights by supporting a book 'before it was cool'
- Your book signed by all every single author
- Your manuscript edited and critiqued by UQ Writers' Club authors
- Having the names of your choice written into custom printed versions of the book as characters in various stories!
Risks and challenges
The biggest challenge we've had with this project has already been met - have you ever tried to get 20 writers to stick to a deadline? It's like herding cats!
We're 90% of the way through writing stories (just finishing up a couple of last chapters) and about 50% of the way through the editing process. So you can be very confident that you'll actually get a book out of this if you back it, and not just an empty box delivered to your doorstop with one of those surprise springy snake things inside.
Thanks for reading! We have put answers to specific questions we think you might want to know in the FAQ below; if you want to know anything else, please don't hesitate to ask (we promise we'll answer no matter how awkward the question).Learn about accountability on Kickstarter
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