Funding Canceled Funding for this project was canceled by the project creator on August 13, 2013.
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Four freshly graduated millennials move back in with their parents and struggle to move to Manhattan. Awkward. Failure. Ensues.

"Wait you little bastards made that? You're absurd. How'd it go down?" 

It was October of 2012 when I approached Brett with the script for the pilot City-Bound. Over three cold weekends in January 2013 we shot a 25-minute pilot and entered post. Recently that very pilot became a finalist in the NYTVF 2013 Comedy Central competition. Now it's time to adapt this creative effort into the medium of the future - the web series. 

"Web what? This doesn't make any sense." 

There's a shift in today's consumption of content and we feel City-Bound's audience will love bite-sized episodes at five minutes in length.  It's not TV but there are advantages to online distribution that we love. For one, there's no rules whatsoever as proven by every video that frat bro showed his other frat bro when least expected. Secondly, we'll be directly in sync with our supporters and fans. This means we'll be able to do a bit of surveying with y'all when it feels right and incorporate your feedback so the programming can be strengthened. 

"You're a couple of sicklings, you know that? Why $24,000?" 

With the $24,000 raised we plan to shoot and release 10 episodes that delve into the most humiliating situations money can buy. At approximately $2,000 an episode we feel a high enough production value can be achieved for scripted programming that passes the watchability test. We won't personally be taking a dime of your contributions but it will afford us the opportunity to invest hundreds of hours into producing great content that goes beyond the Internet clutter of dancing puppies.

"It's actually $2,400 per episode you math geniuses but I guess you're too busy being 'creative' to realize that..."

9% of this money goes to Kickstarter and Amazon right off the top. Then there's the production of the swag and shipment of said swag, leaving us with about $2,000 per episode. 

"Alright so Jake Markowitz fails at everything in The Pilot. What other tricks do you dorks have up your sleeves for future episodes?" 

Here's a spicy sampler from the arsenal...

“The Broken Condom” - Jake and Alex go to a whorehouse in the second-rate neighborhood next to theirs. Things are great until Jake’s condom breaks inside a prostitute and she tells him “…don't worry about it.”

“The 21s Century Woman” -  Jake interviews with a girl he flirted with on Tinder. 

"Woah that was a little raunchier than I was expecting...I love it. What is this Kickstarter thing anyway?" 

You claim a reward and if we hit our goal your contribution gets processed and we start making more episodes so we can deliver on your pledge. If we don't hit our goal your pledge isn't processed but you get our respect.

"I disagree with that douche before me. Those episode ideas sucked. I hate everything about this. Especially how you're writing these headers in quotes when clearly nobody submitted these questions." 

Then tell us to suck your fatty at CityBoundPilot@gmail.com. Or per the reward THE REVENGE, contribute $600 and visit set to deliver a punch to one of our guts. You won't do it you cheap bastard! Or will you? 

"Screw that guy. Back to me, the guy who is ignorant yet somewhat interested. You're really expecting indebted college graduates to contribute to this?" 

If you can't pledge financially there's more ways to help. A social share on Facebook to your besties (+ that girl openly surfing OKCupid at the office + every other person from your past that pops up in your Newsfeed with photos of mundane shit that make you question why you have that stupid thing in the first place) would be delicious. Even tastier would be if your roommate wrote for a popular blog and you published a post about this Kickstarter on his unattended laptop while he was taking a dump (farfetched because he probably has the laptop in the bathroom anyway but you get the idea). 

"Hmm tell me about those Jake Markowitz t-shirts for the reward thing. Do they suck?"

Aw hell no! The tees for our $100+ family are custom-made goodness compliments of Bobby Cohen, Corey's older brother. You will not find these t-shirts anywhere unless this Kickstarter gets so big we're plagiarized! Which, honestly, would be pretty awesome. 

Jake's kinda Phone Sex! This one is featured in The Pilot while Jake Markowitz bombs a standup set.
Jake's kinda Phone Sex! This one is featured in The Pilot while Jake Markowitz bombs a standup set.
Make a $100 donation and you might even be able to regift for Grandma's birthday down in Boca!
Make a $100 donation and you might even be able to regift for Grandma's birthday down in Boca!
This isn't a total Larry David fest. Non-Jews get love in City-Bound, too.
This isn't a total Larry David fest. Non-Jews get love in City-Bound, too.
Writer/Director Corey Cohen getting his toke on in the "High Five" Jake Markowitz special. His political career is now over.
Writer/Director Corey Cohen getting his toke on in the "High Five" Jake Markowitz special. His political career is now over.
To be featured in Season 1 of "City-Bound". China loves the pussy, too!
To be featured in Season 1 of "City-Bound". China loves the pussy, too!

"Cohen and Kohan, right? Can you uh, how do I put this without sounding racist...can you Jews please enlighten me about the finances of this operation? Where are these funds going?"  

Funds will be dispensed from larger budget items to smaller as follows:

1. Cast and crew - There's a big jump in the talent pool from $0 per day to $100. While we have friends willing to help pro bono, it always helps to have room in a budget for strong performances in a dialogue-heavy sitcom. 

2. Equipment rentals - We're not talking Zosia Mamet snobbery and over-the-top tech specs. Just the little things that make a difference like decent sound and lighting equipment when we can't coerce our friends to lend it to us for free.  

3. Locations - To keep things a little spicy we can't just shoot every scene in Brett's parent's basement. While we're crafty (yea that's Penn Station in the video! No we didn't pay to have it closed off all day!), there are times where additional funds can go a long way.

4. Wardrobe + Props - This isn't an 18th Century period piece. There isn't anything too extravagant in this arena that a quick visit to the local consignment shop can't fix.

5. Travel - Nothing exotic but those Long Island Rail Road trips can add up when a dozen people are factored in.

6. Marketing - A little marketing to reach a larger audience when we properly launch. 

7. Food - Everyone will be working for either nothing or next to it. The least we can do is supply Brett's mom with ham and cheese so she can make some sandwiches. 

8. Insurance - While there are no crazy stunts, we don't like to leave anything to chance. A little insurance can go a long way to limiting any potential risk to our cast, crew, and vendors.   

9. Miscellaneous - Background extras for a party scene (when we can't auction that privilege away). Printing. Shipping. Incidentals. A little discretionary spending for these items will allow for fewer limitations and a better experience amongst our viewership.

"Can you wrap this up already? I hate reading."   

Thank you for reading all of this. Hopefully some of the prizes encourage you to contribute or at least share this thing with your friends. If not, you can just do as we'd probably do and flip back to PornHub and go to bed empty inside.

Risks and challenges Learn about accountability on Kickstarter

Film projects in general come with tremendous risks and challenges. A flaky actor (probably from LA, or worse, Idaho but transplanted to LA and claims to be from LA) can have an emotional meltdown and go overseas without notice. A location can back out at the last minute. One of our corporate sponsors might end up being Spam which would just suck to have to incorporate into the show. It's impossible to predict what can happen but we strive to create as many contingency plans as possible to avoid the worst.

The beauty of a web series is that it's fluid and the audience can engage with it and the rules are bendable. This isn't a melodramatic short film where everything's riding on a 10-minute story that has a lifespan of a few film festivals you've never heard of. Even flubs that do occasionally happen can be incorporated into the content because you know where it's coming from. Kind of like when Jerry Garcia would get so high he'd forget the lyrics but his fans would help him along.

The longer term challenge is to make this project self-sustaining, so that we can attract enough of a viewership to produce more episodes on our own. Hopefully we can create an ecosystem that supports more episodes beyond the first 10. It's unlikely but we're offering a Tarantino foot massage to get this project off the ground for Pete's sake! If anyone's ready to make the hard compromises to see this thing through it's us.

FAQ

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15
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    THE LA FAKE // We probably don't know you but your support is deeply appreciated. If we do know you, we'll pump fake a high five before issuing a friendly yet surprising jab in either the testicles or breasts (unless we're related because that would be weird).

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    THE RUSTY BEER PONG SHOT // Digital copy of the City-Bound Pilot script, which was a Top 25 Finalist in the 2013 NYTVF Comedy Central Competition plus bi-weekly newsletter updates from the set.

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    THE RIDE FROM MOM // Immediate digital download of the half-hour City-Bound Pilot episode + Newsletter

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    THE LONG ISLAND RAILROAD SOLDIER // Official 18x24 City-Bound poster +Digital Download +Newsletter

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    THE UNPAID INTERNSHIP // DVD copy of the half-hour City-Bound Pilot Episode +Poster +Newsletter

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    THE CAB TO THE CITY // One-of-a-kind City-Bound t-shirt straight from Jake Markowitz's wardrobe! +DVD +Poster +Newsletter

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    THE MARKOWITZ BRISKET // While we can't guarantee it'll be a brisket you'll come through to set for lunch and get your grub on with the cast and crew. Want to learn about lenses with the Cinematographer? Want to flirt with Blake Rice because you think he's a hottie? Pick your seat, kid! (transportation/lodging not provided) +Tee +DVD +Poster +Newsletter

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    THE WEB BROWSER CLEANSE // Visit set during production and be an extra in an episode of City-Bound (transportation / lodging not provided). +Lunch +Tee +DVD +Poster +Newsletter

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    THE TARANTINO // Need we say more? Come to set and we'll massage your feet for 15 minutes during our lunch break. "We don't tickle or nothing." +Tee +DVD +Poster +Newsletter

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    THE TINDER DATE // Invitation for you & a guest to the New York premiere with reserved seating and a special shout-out at the screening (transportation/lodging not provided). The best part? It doesn't even have to be a stranger from the Internet. +Tee +DVD +Poster +Newsletter

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    THE REVENGE // Do you hate our stupid guts because we're asking you for money over the Internet and haven't spoken to you since high school? Want to fight about it? During a lunch break on set you can punch one of us in the stomach and we'll post it on the Internet (we'll even hide your identity if you so desire ya big bully). +Premiere +Tee +DVD +Poster +Newsletter. Feel free to light these items on fire immediately before or after the punch. Transportation/Lodging not provided.

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    THE GROUPER // Your friends and the City-Bound head honchos for a little 3 on 3 dinner plus a movie (ahem, City-Bound Premiere). Recommended for recently divorced aristocrats in their mid 50's on the prowl for young stud muffins. Or for a concerned parent whose single daughter just stares at her iPhone all day. The buyer of this package gets to pick any three ladies of their choosing to be Corey, Brett, and Blake's dates to The Premiere. +Tee +DVD +Poster +Newsletter

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    THE CORPORATE SELLOUT // Got a sweet product / company / restaurant / Next Big Thing you want to place in an episode in front of the 22-30 demographic? It's in! +Premiere +Tee +DVD +Poster +Newsletter

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    THE SLUMP BUSTER // GUEST STAR in an episode of City-Bound (transportation/lodging not provided). Yes, you will get to speak on camera in a scene that will be featured in the series! +Premiere +Tee +DVD +Poster +Newsletter

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    THE ADULT BIRTHDAY CASH FROM GRANDMA // Associate Producer credit and exclusive access to the set and production process. +Premiere +Tee +DVD +Poster +Newsletter

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    THE LARRY DAVID // Have a humiliating tale from your post-college life? Feel like channeling your inner Jake Markowitz? We'll turn one of your ideas into an episode of City-Bound with a writing credit! Yes, you'll be more interesting than everyone else you encounter at your next cocktail party while talking about this. +Exclusive Access +Premiere +Tee +DVD +Poster +Newsletter

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    THE CORNER OFFICE WITH THE HOT ASSISTANT // You are The (Wo)Man! Executive Producer Credit. Since you call the shots you get to make a reasonably unreasonable request that we'll make happen. Always wanted to play a transvestite but never had the opportunity? Need Junior's Cheesecake delivered to your door like Puff Daddy in that reality TV show? Your wish is our command, Mr./Ms. Executive Producer. +Exclusive Access +Premiere +Tee +DVD +Poster +Newsletter

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    THE MARK CUBAN // C'mon Mark, we know you're good for it. Inspire the Jake Markowitzs of the world by letting us shoot a few days of your life with a Success & Motivation theme. If that's too sappy we'll film your house MTV Cribs style. Of course for this price we'll come to you, Mr. Cuban. +Executive Producer +Exclusive Access +Premiere +Tee +DVD +Poster +Newsletter

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