Personal Essay: Marguerite Kenner
I can’t think of a better way to say this, so let’s go with the trope — I wouldn’t be sitting where I am today, writing this, if not for Pseudopod.
It was my first podcast. Episode 128, “Bone Mother,” aired February 6, 2009. My commute was just shy of an hour each way, and podcasts are how I filled the time in traffic crossing the Dunbarton Bridge. Friday’s Pseudopod and a drive-thru Starbucks were my reward at the end of a long week, and my gear up for increasingly uncomfortable weekends. Alasdair’s sexy accent and brutally transparent insights into his own difficult experiences bolstered my own tentative explorations of fitness and a growing unease about needing to do more with my life than just work and game. It’s how I found more podcasts, rekindled my love of reading, and Twitter.
And realized my marriage was doomed. Fifteen years is a long time to be anything, least of all the angry person you were as a teenager. Change needed to happen, and I was floundering under the weight of having to do so mostly alone.
Then one day, between comparing current-favorite movies (Ladyhawke for me, Empire Records for him), my Twitter acquaintance, the podcast host, admitted he was having a bad day. I said I was too. And the rest was history.
So here I am. One career reboot, eight time zones and 5,000 miles from where I started. The man on the other side of the episode is splitting a pizza with me across the restaurant table, blushing when I remind him he once had what might legitimately be called “forum groupies.” We’ve both come an incredibly long way, both in distance and in really needing to get around to planning that wedding.
My commute’s a lot shorter these days, but every Friday, it’s still about a coffee to-go and those first driving beats of “Bloodletting On The Kiss.”
Marguerite Kenner is a native Californian who has forsaken sunny paradise to live with her true love in Merrye Olde England. When she’s not grappling with legal conundrums as a solicitor, editing Cast of Wonders, or helping behind the scenes as COO of Escape Artists, she can be found narrating audio fiction, studying popular culture (i.e. going to movies and playing video games) with her partner Alasdair Stuart, or curling up with a really good book. You can follow her adventures on Twitter.