Woohoo! Time to celebrate!

Just a quick note to let you know that our Kickstarter campaign is a success! What an exciting ride, receiving $5k in the last four days and hitting our target $10k last night. It is difficult for me to express how truly grateful I am to each and every one of you. I am overwhelmed by the amount of support, encouragement, and generosity — everyone from family to friends and coworkers, friends of friends and kind souls I have never met but share a common bond with. Thank you.

Your support has a tremendous impact on me and I'm so glad to have this opportunity; I've received a second chance in life and going to do everything I can to help others just as you have for me.

I'll have a more detailed message after our Kickstarter campaign has officially ended but I just wanted to take this time to celebrate with you and thank you for believing in our project as we fight for those living with BPD.

Dancin' in the street,

Amanda

I'm excited to let you know our t-shirts have been printed and ready!

Professional boxer, Contender finalist, Trinity Boxing trainer and friend, "Hollywood" Hino Ehikhamenor sports our freshly printed t-shirt. We've already received some great compliments on it and hope, with our fundraising efforts, we can begin handing them out to our wonderful backers.

But remember, t-shirts and other rewards can only be handed out if we reach our $10k goal. So if you'd like a tee, don't forget to back our project and shout it out to the rooftops: our t-shirts are here!

thanks!
Amanda

PS if you received this in an email and don't see the image, click here: http://bit.ly/a8egEH

Dear Friends,

It's been a wonderful ride on our first Kickstarter campaign but unfortunately we're coming to a close in 3 days. Saturday will be the last day to back our project and we are currently $4,579 short. No one said this would be easy, and like many battles I have been up against, I'm not able to win this fight alone. Every champion has a team behind them, and today I am asking you to help a weary fighter fight her last few rounds.

If you haven't backed our project, please pledge at any amount you feel comfortable with. Who knows — even if you pledge one dollar it just might be the one that brings us to the finish line!

If you've already backed our project, I can't thank you enough for your support. Please spread the word about our project. I've posted some templates below for your Twitter, Facebook and plain ol' email use to make it easy. Copy, paste, and you've increased our chances of success immensely.

I don't know if I've believed in anything more wholeheartedly — mind, body & heart — than this project. My commitment goes beyond this fundraiser — because whether we reach the goal or not, I am dedicated to fighting for those with Borderline Personality Disorder both in the ring and as an advocate. But making this journey together with you and with our own personal camera — that would be the greatest gift. Today I need your help to make our dream come to reality; to make other people's pain and suffering understood; to rally a community together behind a cause; to live and know we've done everything we can to better the lives of others.

This is my reason to keep fighting.

Please join me. Pledge now and spread the word. We need $4,579 by midnight Saturday. Thank you.

Your friend, amateur-boxer-in-training and advocate for BPD,

Amanda
PS: see below for the templates for Twitter, Facebook & Email

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For Twitter: The time is now — we need your help! Spread the word. Back a good cause. Wear a sweet tee. http://kck.st/aAbXpK #Amanda'sFight

For Facebook: Alrighty folks, times like these that I get excited. I'm donating my FB status today to help spread the word about my friend's fight to become an amateur boxer and knock the heck out of mental illness stigma. Please support: Watch the trailer. Be inspired. Back the project. Rock the bad-ass tee! Thanks! http://kck.st/aAbXpK

For Email: Hi Friends,

It isn't everyday that I approach my co-workers, friends and family to support a cause, but when someone shares a deep and personal part of their lives for the benefit of others — I am compelled to make an exception. My friend Amanda Wang was diagnosed a couple of years ago with a serious mental illness known as Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD). Since then, she has traveled across the country talking about the disorder and has developed a documentary following her journey, The Fight Within Us. Through these initiatives Amanda will help create change in the perception of BPD as a throw-away diagnosis into a hopeful, treatable one.

Amanda's courage to open up about her disorder and take on the challenge of the Golden Gloves (yes, boxing!) has personally been an inspiration to me. For anyone who has been touched by mental illness or even struggled to overcome obstacles, this is a great opportunity to share our support and join her cause.

And so I am approaching you today to ask you to back this project and help spread the word to your friends and family. Every pledge, no matter how big or small, counts!!! Please pledge today: http://kck.st/aAbXpK

Thank you!

Hi all you t-shirt backers! Thanks so much for choosing the t-shirt reward. Once we reach our goal we can't wait to ship them out to you. We're getting ready to print the first round of t-shirts and want to know which design you like better (click on link if you can't see the image in your email). Feel free to comment to let me know! thanks! - Amanda

I'm in Washington, D.C. for the rest of the week at the National Alliance for Mentally Ill (NAMI) National Convention. So far it has been a wonderful experience speaking at the presentation, "Remarkable Women in Recovery."

In the picture I'm with author and dear friend Kiera Van Gelder, who has just released a memoir, "Buddha and the Borderline." BPD life coach Tami Green and author Randi Kreger were also presenters. Truly wonderful to witness these women in the BPD community come to life.

The whole day has already been a touching experience. One woman from the audience patiently waited to speak to me. She thanked me for my talk and said, "If only my daughter was able to hear you speak. Perhaps she would still be alive." She began to cry, and I began to cry too. I just gave her a hug. I felt helpless, wanting so much to console her. She told me of her daughter's story, how she is survived by two kids and had battled with a misdiagnosis for half her life. I asked her for her daughter's name.

"Heather," she said. I searched for something to say.. the only thing I could muster up was, "Thank you for sharing your story with me. I can't imagine how hard this must be. For what it's worth, I'll be thinking of Heather and remember your story as I make my journey."

I'm going to do my best to make her proud. It is times like these that you realize how much work still needs to be done. I just know we can do it.

Special thanks to Jamie, one of our generous backers, for allowing me to share her email with you. I've come across many mothers through this project (like backer & blogger Kris Ulland) who are oftentimes the patient's strongest advocate, no matter what our age. I've learned that mothers do anything and everything they can to relieve their child's suffering and, at the same time realize, in the throws of mental illness, how powerless they sometimes are.

Despite this fact, I know that as a daughter, a mother's unwavering belief — the faith that we are worthy of being alive, of being loved — is one of the greatest gifts they can give us. I still remember my mom telling me stories at night as a child. I wonder what kind of stories she would tell me now to help me understand, to help me believe what she sees in me when I can't see anything in myself.

I often feel that I should be strong for my mother, protecting her from things she can't fix. But maybe, because of this, I'm missing out on the stories she would tell me. Perhaps I should ask her. For now, Jamie's story serves as an example:



My story is simple, really. I am the mom of a daughter diagnosed with BPD. She is 24 years old, beautiful, brilliant, amazing... and so many of the things that you described in your story is so her. She has finally found the courage to work toward a college degree and is doing well... but doubts her ability to ever overcome her "limitations." She doesn't acknowledge BPD like you do — she is not currently seeing a therapist and she doesn't speak freely about it — despite the diagnosis and several sessions attending Dialectical Behavior Therapy.

As for me — I want to see the stigma associated with BPD (especially with some clinicians, who can sometimes take such a fatalistic approach) gone forever. I want to see BPD understood. I want there to be more research. I want my daughter, and all of the other daughters and sons out there to somehow understand their inherent worth and to know the love.

Amanda, you represent a candle in the darkness (not to be cliche, but it's true). Your hard work toward a very cool goal (Golden Gloves) is inspiring and someday, when she is ready, I want to share your story with my sweet girl. In the meantime, your goals of dialogue across social media about BPD will effect change. I just know it.

*image via Dan Stefani.

Thanks to journalist Molly Raskin for highlighting my story in a comprehensive BPD article in Scientific American Mind titled, When Passion Is The Enemy

Finding yourself in a published article is an exciting, nerve-wracking and humbling experience. On the one hand it's a chance to share a part of yourself with a larger audience, but on the other hand, you don't really know which part of your story will be shared. Molly did her journalistic due-diligence, interviewing me a number of times over the course of a year. As she came to know me, I often alluded to crises but intentionally kept specifics vague. I knew, however, she would eventually ask me the tough questions.

For the first time, with this article, my battle with self-injury is being shared openly. As I read the opening paragraphs I began to cringe, perhaps realizing from an on-lookers perspective, how grave this illness is. It brought me back to one of the worst moments in my life, where I engaged in acts I simply couldn't understand, couldn't control. I began to feel ashamed as I read the words my family would read; behaviors they weren't able to prevent because they couldn't even know the extent of the struggle I endured. It brought me back very quickly to my life underground in a battle that no one saw. Even today, with all my speaking and advocacy work, it is rare that I mentioned self-injury outside my therapist's office. It is something I still continue to struggle with. I just compartmentalize it well.

Molly quotes psychiatrist Glen O. Gabbard, saying how "you could meet a patient with BPD in a social setting and not have an inkling that the patient had a major psychiatric disorder. The very next day the same patient could appear in an emergency room in a suicidal crisis and require hospitalization.”

My therapist often tells me that I have the kind of apparent competence that Dr. Gabbard speaks of. People who begin to know me are often shocked to hear that I have a mental illness. Then again, most of the people in our BPD support group look just like me. I remember one woman who said, "I'm so glad to know that there are other people like me, out there with this disorder. And you all look so normal."

Self Injury is perhaps the most misunderstood and puzzling symptom to bear witness to. When you really break down why people self-injure, it makes complete sense if you don't have any other kind of coping-mechanism to use in order to survive. Yes. Self injury is a survival tool, albeit a seductive, dangerous one.

I wouldn't want anyone to find themselves in this exhausting battle. It humbles me to think that so many others continue to suffer alone in self-injury. Perhaps that is why this story needs to be shared openly with others. Thank you for listening and backing our project. This brings it home for me.

When you're faced with obstacles and adversity, that's when you find out who you really are. - Julie Ann Kelly

Julie Ann Kelly is a two-time Golden Gloves champion and one of the friendliest people I know. I first met Julie just starting out at Trinity Boxing Club — always encouraging and willing to share what she knows to help improve our game. I had a chance to interview her and watch her spar over the weekend — I'm proud and lucky to have Julie in my corner (and as a backer!).

As soon as I heard that question, my eyes lit up.

Thanks to the generosity of Nick Morgan, I was able to attend his two-day Public Words Speaker Forum 2010 featuring Pam Slim, Steve Farber and other passionate people changing the world in their own wonderful ways. At the start of the weekend, I didn't think myself as much of a communicator. By the time I left I was hungry for more, confident I'd be back next year, speaking before the very same audience.

It's not everyday that I feel this kind of stuff in my bones. My self-doubt has a way of keeping me locked in, head hung low, lurking in the shadows, trying to blend in.

The peculiar thing is that I left Boston with a renewed sense of purpose. I rode back home with all the enthusiasm and fire needed to change the world. I owned it. I didn't need permission anymore. It was a flash of insight, a moment of empowerment. It was quite freeing, albeit short lived. Still, something stuck (thank goodness) and I was starting to get it.

What, in a matter of two days, did I finally get? With the help of the amazing people in the conference, somehow I made the leap. I finally realized that by denying myself a life of any value, I not only lessened my life's work but I also denied others of their own value and ability to fully participate in their life's work.

I've realized that in my own tiny sphere of influence I'm not even the beginning; more so, I exist as a part of this long continuum — remarkable things that started way before me and will continue much after me. The real work begins when I am able to bring who I am and what I do into this space.

It hit me. That's why I needed to believe... because once you do it opens up a whole new frame to work with. Things that you never even said before, never even owned up to, never admitted become a part of your make-up. Perhaps for the first time you hear yourself say it.

I exist.

It's finally in my vocabulary. I'm beginning to get it.

Being diagnosed with BPD is, in a really weird way, one the best things that have ever happened to me. It has been three years since I received my diagnosis — and I still have my struggles and setbacks — but because of my diagnosis, I now have a community behind me. There is strength in community. I want others to know just how strong we are, how much fight we have in us.

Help us reach 1000 backers — a small percentage of the 16 million who live with BPD — and make a statement to the mental health community. If you've already pledged — thank you so much! Please continue to help spread the word. If you haven't just yet, all you have to do is pledge as little as $1. Whether you have the same diagnosis as I have, know someone who has lived with mental illness, or just as passionate about community as I am, we can come together and share our voice. Your voice counts and I believe this is our opportunity to use it.

If you believe in our what we are doing, if you believe that people living with BPD have something extraordinary to contribute, if you believe that we deserve a shot at the best life we can have, let's make a statement together. Let's step up to the challenge: we are 16 Million strong.

Thank you always,

Amanda

Pam Slim is our very first backer and the main reason why this Kickstarter campaign came about. I've never met her in person before, but in the little time that we've worked together she has given me a new lens from which to look my life through. Many times my sensitive eyes has welled up because of something she said or did. Her correspondences are short, delightful and of course encouraging. What separates Pam from many generous and wonderful people is that with each impression she leaves, slowly, you begin to recognize that what already exists inside you is not only real and true, but is also worthy of being shared with the world. You begin to believe it yourself because she has already believed in you.

Pam is proof that we are here to link to others; to raise people up when they might not fully believe in their own potential. This is her gift — her ability to wholeheartedly believe in the people she connects with and connect them with each other. I know I'm only one of many who have been touched by her, but I am thankful for her presence in my life and in this project we have breathed life into.

To our first backer, Pam, thank you for believing in me and in this thing I have kept close to my heart. It's time for me to share it with the world.

For more on Pam's great work check her out at Escape From Cubicle Nation and follow her on twitter via @pamslim. Image via Ivan Martinez Photography

Hi Kickstarter Friends!

Thanks for stopping by! Wow how excited am I to get this far in our project, here right now, connecting with you. And it's only begun! The development of our documentary has already taken us to many places, encountering so many great people. They are the ones I look up to, those who live with BPD, those who help people with BPD, and those who didn't know anything about the disorder but believe in the fight within all of us. They are the ones who've kept me going and it truly has opened a new world to me. But it doesn't end there. It actually continues forward with you. So come on in, join our corner, support our documentary and share the next 57 days with us!

I hope you check out our rewards and if you like what you see, be sure to pledge! You can see a sneak peak of our poster and t-shirt design below.

Thank you everyone for the support thus far, you rock! I'd love to hear from you, so feel free to comment below or shoot me a message. Please keep spreading the word! We can do this!

Best,

Amanda