This is the re-launch campaign with the less aggressive goal: $500. Please Pledge!

The STORY: 

(Meant to be read in an old southern accent and misspelled words are intentional to reflect the accent).

Battle of the Florida Roadkill

The Truth Behind Roadkill:

If you live around me than I'm sure you've seen your share of what people like to call "Roadkill". But, I bet you didn't know that it wasn't the cars that did the little varmints in. Now, I ain't saying that they weren't at some point run over by a car… but, what I am saying is that it wasn't the car that killed them. 

You see I live in a little town that we like to call "Dead City". We call it that cuz there ain't too much to do around here. I am smack dab in the middle of Florida on the busy highway 301. My house sits right near that old highway. 

Since there isn't much to do here in Old Dead City, I find myself just sitting on the porch or by the window watching the different cars go by. Well, if you don't think that that sounds like very much fun then mostly I'd say that you were right. 

During the day you don't see too much interesting on this old strip of highway except maybe an old Volkswagen from time to time. The real interesting stuff is what happens at night. The time when most folks are supposed to be sleeping. That's the time when the battles begin… 

Now I know what your thinking, "Battles? What are you talking about you ole kook? But, sure as I am breathing, I seen em' with my own eyes. You see when most folks have gone to sleep that's when the critters go to war. 

From what I've seen, the opossums and the armadillos don't take to kindly to one another. It seems that they have a bit of a feud going on. Now, I don't know who or what started the feud but, my guess is it's been going on for so long that they don't know what they're fighting over either. All I can say is that they are not on the same side. Some of the other critters have picked sides, though…

You might be surprised to know that the squirrels allied with the armadillos while the opossums brought in the turtles for their armored shells. I guess the opossums didn't care too much for the squirrels high energy and I think that they were a bit jealous of the squirrel's bushy tail. 

The squirrels must have know'd this cuz' when it came time to picking sides, they threw right on in with the armadillos. Turtles on the other hand, well, they ain't too motivated so, when the opossums picked them they just went right along with it.

I remember one night 'specially. Them tricky opossums tried to make a sneak attack on the armadillos. They painted the turtle's shells all white and sent them out into the road. On account that they wanted the armadillos to think they were fixin' to surrender. All the while, the opossums were waiting in the bushes for the armadillos to come out and meet em'. Well, those armadillos look dense enough but, they might just surprise you with their wits. What happened was that the armadillos stationed the squirrels up in the trees. 

Sure enough, right when the armadillos went out to meet the turtles, the opossums tried to jump them and whip at 'em with their whip-type tails. Well, the squirrels caught sight of what they were fixin' to do and they let loose with a barrage of acorn fire. 

Them opossums didn't fair too well that night. The next morning it looked like an eighteen wheel tractor trailer put down a whole clan of opossums during a family reunion. Well, you and me, we know better. But, it doesn't make sense arguing with folks when they want to believe otherwise. 

Now, next time you see that old roadkill you just remember what I told you and hope like me that them critters work things out. As a matter of fact, some of them did work their differences out. If you listen real good... one day I'll tell you about them.

... To be continued....

See the REWARDS section to the right and see what goodies you will get for your money --------------->

FAQ:

What Are We Paying For?

My five year old daughter and myself have written and are still writing a series of Children's Books that are fun to read for kids as well as adults. We are focused on making great and funny stories coupled with awesome artwork and great illustrations. These are the real stories behind the roadkill that we see in the middle of the road. They are based specifically on the roadkill in Florida in the area where we lived and where my children were born.

The first and second of the stories in the series are already written. We want to self-publish the first of these stories "The Truth Behind Roadkill" rather than wait on a publishing house to "get" what we are trying to write. This will bring these great stories to the world quickly and the way that we want to tell them. 

What's in it for Me?

You will receive in exchange for your pledge a first edition of "The Truth Behind Roadkill" in PDF/EPUB and/or in paperback. Of course, depending on the amount of your pledge you could receive a lot more (Check out the rewards section on the left of the page)!

Plus, you may be helping us to make history if we can achieve our ultimate goal!

What is your Ultimate Goal?

Beyond getting the stories published and for sale on Amazon as well as other outlets... it is our hope that my 5 year old daughter, who co-authored the story and who is listed with author credit in the library of congress' copyright for the book series, will become the youngest ever New York Times Best Selling Author. The record stands at 11 years old. 

But, Did She REALLY Write it?

My daughter just started kindergarten and while her penmanship is coming along she is more of a story-teller. She has a vivid imagination and though I had the idea of this story bumping around in my head for a few years... when I started to write it down and tell it to her at bedtime, she would proceed to change the names of the characters and what would happen to them. Her input makes the stories. I write them in such a way that adults won't want to vomit while reading them and she makes them fun for the kids.

Yes, she is the co-author...I am only giving to her the credit that she is due.

Who Drew These Awesome Illustrations?

The Battles of the Florida Roadkill Illustrations are being done by an artist who also lives in Florida, Schiani Ledo of LEDO Designs. As you can see from the initial sketch that he provided for the kickstarter campaign, he is extremely talented.

So, lets make history together while introducing an awesome children's book to the world!