Kickstarter

One prop arrow costs about $1 US Dollar in 2012. The more arrows we can buy, the more Indians we can kill in the show. The more Indians we can kill, the more land we can possess. The more land we can possess, the greater our international agricultural output. Help build America for only $1.

I want to sell tickets so, I'm going to give you one with this pledge. Coincidentally, this is also the price of one advanced ticket. See, fair and balanced.

Want to take your boyfriend to the show? Pledge $50. Want to take your Mom to the show? Pledge $50. Want to take your Mom's boyfriend to the show? Pledge $50. Cause I'm giving you two tickets if you pledge $50.

New reward! If you give at this amount or above, you'll get a special glimpse into our audition process for the show! Remember those prop arrows you passed up on donating toward? Well, give at this level and I'll use one on your face. In the show. Seriously. You'll also get a poster autographed by the cast (hope they're talented). And I'll give you 8 tickets so, you can take your boyfriend, your Mom, her boyfriend, his Mom, your Dad, your sister, and her ex (please request oxygen tank accessible seating for your Mom's boyfriend's Mom).

I'll buy you dinner (probably at Red Robin, though). And you'll get everything else mentioned. And I'll give you 20 tickets. Because 500 divided by 20 is?

Ever wanted to be a Producer? Well, here's your chance to sink a bunch of money into one of the worst financial investments ever: live theatre. Except, you won't get any money back. You'll just have your name listed next to mine. And, I'll give you as many tickets as you want.