About this project

SO HERE'S THE DEAL:
Direct Hit is gonna put out an album next year if we can raise the money to do it. We're already about halfway there, after selling a bunch of tapes to a bunch of our friends for a way-inflated price, but now we need to raise the other half to pay for mixing and mastering.

To do that, we're holding the "Direct Hit Dignity Sale" on this here Kickstarter page. It's pretty self-explanatory: Depending on the amount of money you choose to donate, Direct Hit will provide you with a small token allowing you to proclaim, publicly, that we begged for your money, and thus traded a certain amount of our self-respect for your pocket change. Whether that be putting a button on your coat, or uploading a video to YouTube of Mike and Robbie drunkenly blubbering about you while dressed like infants, the choice is yours. Check it:

FOR A $1 DONATION, you'll get a "DIRECT HIT SUCKS" sticker to put anywhere you'd like, allowing you to show your friends that even we admit that we're not awesome - Obviously, because the sticker says "DIRECT HIT SUCKS", and we made it, not you.

FOR A $5 DONATION, you'll get the sticker, a matching 1" "DIRECT HIT SUCKS" pin, and a very handsome, smiling, printed, and signed photographic portrait of our drummer, Daniel Walkowiak, in a shirt and tie, perfect for framing and hanging above the bed of your most-loved, closeted pedophile. Or you know, just to put above your record player to remind you of how fucking stupid this band actually is.

FOR A $10 DONATION, you'll get everything above, plus a "DIRECT HIT SUCKS" patch, and a video of our guitarist and bassist, Robbie and Mike, hammered on Old Thompson, in which they will offer you a gushing, joyful thank-you for your money. The video will be delivered to you via Mediafire for posting on YouTube and/or Facebook, so that not only you, but all of your friends can laugh at what ludicrous depths we've gone to make a buck.

FOR A $15 DONATION, you'll get everything above, as well as a cassette copy of Nick's hilarious pop-punk band from high school playing a preposterous song he wrote called "Internet Girlfriend," showing that he not only sucks now, but has sucked for many, many years. Kind of similar to that tape of the two people in Grizzly Man getting eaten alive by bears, except way more fun to crank when Nick walks into your house party, uninvited.

FOR A $20 DONATION, you'll get everything above, except in the video, Robbie and Mike will be dressed in diapers and baby bonnets, with pacifiers in their mouths, because why not?

FOR A $25 DONATION, you'll get everything above, plus MP3 copies of all of Direct Hit's songs up until this point (20 of them!), which have all been removed from the internet (not), enabling you to show everyone you know that our efforts to produce anything better than Buckcherry's "awesome" new album are most definitely futile.

...AND FOR A $30 DONATION, you'll not only get the sticker, button, patch, photo, video, cassette, and MP3s, but a white t-shirt emblazoned with the totally demoralizing slogan "DIRECT HIT SUCKS - I HAVE PROOF" in black ink. Which you'll be able to back up with a whole pile of video, audio, and photographic evidence.

NOTE: If we don't reach our $1,850 goal by the end of January, NOBODY GETS CHARGED ANYTHING - your donation goes through once we hit that number.

Kickstarter provides us with a list of everyone who donates over the course of this fundraiser, so we'll get in touch with you once it's over to get your address. Thanks in advance. High five.