• design a cover
• pay a copyeditor
• layout the interior
• market the book
• or get it printed

I realize I could do most of those things myself but I want this book to look professional. I want it to fit in with the likes of books published by Penguin, Random House, or any of the other big publishers. And that, my friends, requires dinero. I've already been in contact with a professional copyeditor, design company, and printing house. They've already given me estimates and now we're waiting on the funds.So that's where you come in! With your support, I'll be able to publish this book the way I'd like. Thanks for your help! 

(You can read more excerpts at www.justagirlfromkansas.com.)

When I came back inside I heard a woman telling Sam, “Jai is having some of the young people over at his studio to chant tonight. You should come.” Sam said thanks, but no thanks, she felt really tired.

We went to the bathroom just before we left and while we were in there Sam yelled over the stalls that the guy who was having people over to chant was the brother of the celebrity Ben Blakely.(Obviously there is no celebrity named Ben Blakely; I changed the name to protect his privacy.)  

“Wow, really? I know exactly who that is!”

Sam and I walked back to her car and she asked me if I wanted to go chant with the young people. Sam was too tired but she offered to drop me off at the studio, assuring me someone would give me a ride home. A part of me wanted to go and felt disappointed the night was over already, (it was only 9:15), but I also have a policy of not going anywhere without knowing how I’ll get home. So I declined. Sam started talking to me about Jai, and asked me what kind of guys I’m interested in. When I told her I tend to like the creative types, she turned the car around so we could go to Jai’s studio (he's a musician). She said she felt like he and I had to meet.

Someone buzzed us into the apartment building and my heart hammered a million miles a minute. I felt nervous. Really nervous.

We walked into someone’s bedroom, crowded with people. The apartment renter had a roommate who wasn’t into chanting, so the living room was off limits. There was a crowd of young adults, 18 to 35, sitting on the floor, on the bed, jammed into every nook and cranny possible. I sidled toward the bed, the only place with any room to sit. I shed my coat and assessed the crowd around me, trying to ascertain who was related to Ben Blakely.

The chanting started up again and, while I didn’t particularly love it, I enjoyed being around like-minded people (I asked for this!). I enjoyed being with people around my age who were into spirituality. It was a whiff of fresh air after the stagnancy of Eli’s company.

As I sat on the bed, I heard the man behind me chanting in my ear. I think you can tell a lot about a person by their voice. You can know whether they are warm or not, whether they’re kind, if you’ll get along. I place a lot of stock in people’s voices. The guy behind me? I liked his voice. I thought to myself, “He may not be Jai Blakely, but he would do.”

The chant ended and we shifted positions. I got off the bed and moved to the floor. The guy sitting behind me jumped up and crossed the room. I looked up and it was the guy I kept passing at the ashram, the one I immediately felt attracted to!

He lingered in the doorway and then sauntered across the bedroom to talk to someone on the bed, which was caddy-corner to where I started sitting. I really, really wanted to introduce myself but he crossed the room again before I could interject.

Then he saw me.

I looked at him intently through lowered lashes. I felt hot, a blush coloring my cheeks. I pushed the sleeves of my long-sleeve shirt up to my elbows. He smiled at me, the kind of smile that turns women to mush. The kind of smile where your heart pounds faster, makes you melt, and prompts a smile in return. Then he crossed the room to talk to me.

He proffered his hand and said, “I’m Jai.”

“I’m Rebekah.”

“I saw you around the ashram tonight. Did you go to the chant?”

“Yes.”

“That was a recording, this is live.”

I nodded because, yes, I surmised this was live and not a recording. And with that he walked back to his doorway.

After the chants finished for the evening I popped up and headed toward the doorway to talk to Jai. A magnetism, a force greater than myself, seemed to propel me toward him. Normally I’m shy and have trouble talking to guys I’m interested in. In the past I would have sat in the background and looked on from afar. Not so with Jai. I wanted to know him better.

Jai was in conversation with someone else, telling him about upcoming events. I stood there waiting for a break in the conversation. Jai said to the guy, “You should come to my shows. Then he turned to me and said, “You should come too.”

I smiled as he fished for a piece of paper and a pencil from his pocket so I could write down my e-mail address for him to put me on his listserv. I took them from him and turned to the door, using its hard surface to write down my e-mail address.

I turned back and asked, “Can you read it?”

Instead of taking the slip of paper from me, he cupped my fist with his two fists. As he did so I felt a shock, a jolt of electricity course through me while our skin connected. I felt tingly all over, like all of my nerves were firing.

I’ve had crushes in the past and I’ve touched those crushes—either hugged them or grazed their arm—but I have never in my life had a reaction like that to anyone. I have never physically felt electricity from a point of contact. 

He released my hand and Sam came over and said, “This is Jai.”

He told her we’d already met.

He asked if he would see me at the ashram. I told him I wasn’t sure because I already had my own spiritual practices. He nodded his head and said, “OK.”

When Sam and I left I realized I was hooked. 

You can read more at my website: www.justagirlfromkansas.com