Thanks everyone for your patience in dealing with this book's requisite amount of elephant stool. After a good few weeks of confusion about who has your money and why they have it, we have finally gotten the "oops, our bad" from Amazon payments and are pushing forward with the PR campaign on this monster. We appreciate that this has caused a bit of frustration for all those involved (including us, to be sure) and are doing what we can to get things cleared up as soon as possible.
In the meantime, our foul-mouthed little bastard has ventured out into the world. Fifi, Kill! is available at any bookstore with an Ingram account (which is to say, any bookstore) and is steadily popping up in eBook stores such as Powell's and Kobo and will continue to appear as we get our information out to the different sellers (Kindle and Nook are coming soon, s***head's honor).
Most importantly, rewards are finally getting out the door. The paperbacks are in stock at Offshoot Productions, the website is going up, Peach and M. are painting their chests, thongs and special editions are on order. You'll be seeing our crap in your mailbox and via updates here in the coming days, so stick around.
Thank you all from the bottom of our rotten, putrid hearts. The clown is out of the box and there's no stopping him now.
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Pledge $5 or moreYou selected
An eBook copy of 'Fifi, Kill!' Guaranteed not to infect your computer with viruses. We can't promise anything in regards to your mind or moral character, though.Estimated delivery:
Pledge $10 or moreYou selected
An eBook copy of 'Fifi, Kill!' and your name on the book's website. It doesn't have to be your real name; we know that not everyone wants that kind of infamy.Estimated delivery:
Pledge $15 or moreYou selected
'Fifi, Kill!' in paperback. That's 99 cents less than the retail price. Frugality is sexy, and sex sells. Donate and sell out. Also, your name (or a name of your choice) on the book's website.Estimated delivery:
Pledge $25 or moreYou selected
You clearly have enough money to be more interesting than the $15 kids. You'll get your paperback, but what you get on the book's website is a personalized thank-you note written on Peach or M.'s chest and photographed. Guaranteed safe for work (sorry, boys & girls).Estimated delivery:
Pledge $50 or moreYou selected
We shed a single crystalline tear in honor of your dedication. Your paperback and personalized thank-you photo come with a thong printed with A.E. Scott's excellent cover art. Please specify size. Or a mug if you don't want a thong, but who doesn't want a thong?Estimated delivery:
Pledge $125 or moreYou selected
While we can't *guarantee* that funding the entire project will get you out of purgatory, and can't (per the terms of service) offer to be your slave for a day either, what we can do is this: in addition to the paperback and the mug-or-thong, we'll send you a personalized hardcover of 'Fifi, Kill!' with a text-free alternate cover. How many personalized hardcovers will be printed? As many as we have $125 donors. "Collectible" is the term. And instead of a thank-you photo, you get a video. Isn't that special?Estimated delivery:
- (20 days)