PHONE CALL FROM CTHULHU - When the stars are right (when we successfully raise $25K), using the Necronomicon, Chris LaMartina and Jimmy George will awaken Great Cthulhu from his slumber and give him your phone number. Before he destroys mankind, Cthulhu will give you a call.

Chris LaMartina and Jimmy George write your OkCupid profile. We don't have H.P. Lovecraft's astounding imagination, but we'll do our best to make your profile irresistible.

Receive audio downloads of the PRESIDENT’S DAY ORIGINAL SCORE and the WITCH'S BREW ORIGINAL SCORE written and performed by Chris LaMartina. These tunes won't hold a candle to the Music of Erich Zann, but they'll make you wiggle your tail fins.

Receive one of the last remaining “Choose Chelsea” campaign pins from our third feature, PRESIDENT’S DAY.

SPECIAL THANKS in the CALL GIRL OF CTHULHU credits and on IMDB. Plus a front row seat to the end of civilization when Great Cthulhu awakens.

Receive one of three options: 1) A LINCOLN LAMBS shirt as seen in our third feature, PRESIDENT'S DAY or 2) A PRESIDENT'S DAY shirt featuring the masked Abe Lincoln killer with the stove-pipe hat... Sizes S, M, L.

Receive a pre-release DVD SCREENER of the completed film, CALL GIRL OF CTHULHU. Each numbered and signed DVD will be delivered to your door before the official distribution release. Plus “Special Thanks” in the CALL GIRL OF CTHULHU credits and on IMDB.

Receive a zip file of our unproduced screenplays. These four Weird Tales include: BARMAGEDDON, DEAD ENDS, DISMEMBER THE DOLLS, and TOMBSTONED. Be warned, like "The King in Yellow", these screenplays have been known to drive readers insane.

Receive an AUTOGRAPHED copy of the BOOK OF LORE/GRAVE MISTAKES DOUBLE FEATURE DVD. Plus “Special Thanks” in the CALL GIRL OF CTHULHU credits and on IMDB. Plus a DVD featuring all 12 Episodes of the LOST TRAILER PARK: NEVER COMING ATTRACTIONS web series. Plus a DVD featuring assorted Midnight Crew Studios shorts including: IMMATURE BURIAL, TRICK OR TWEET, and YESTERMESSENGER. Plus a front row seat to the end of civilization when Great Cthulhu awakens from his slumber.

Director Chris LaMartina will write/record a 30 second song for you (guitar or hip-hop based). The subject matter is up to you. This music won't hold a candle to the Music of Erich Zann, but it'll make you wiggle your parts.

Receive the LOVECRAFT ACTIVITY PACK. Including: 1) THE COLOUR OUT OF SPACE COLORING BOOK. This tome contains illustrations of unimaginable creatures, fearsome God-like entities, and plenty of tentacles. 2) AT THE MOUNTAINS OF MADD LIBS. Create custom versions of Lovecraft's sublime horror stories by filling in your own nouns, verbs, adjectives, and adverbs. 3) POSTCARDS FROM MYTHOS LOCALES: Arkham, Dunwich, Kingsport, and Innsmouth. Each Activity Pack will contain a different post card. 4) MISKATONIC UNIVERSITY DIPLOMA. Plus “Special Thanks” in the CALL GIRL OF CTHULHU credits and on IMDB.

An illustration of your likeness to be featured in our upcoming horror anthology comic, BURIAL PLOTS, an EC-style publication that will be released next spring.

A CRIME SCENE PHOTO of your Cthulhu Victimized Corpse to be laid out on screen by Detective LaGrassi in CALL GIRL OF CTHULHU. You provide the photo. We'll make it work.

An illustration of your likeness to be included in the pages of the Necronomicon and featured on screen in CALL GIRL OF CTHULHU.

A CUSTOM SEX AD using your photo to be included in the pages of the Arkham Post and featured on screen in CALL GIRL OF CTHULHU. You provide the photo. We'll make it work.

A candlelight dinner date with director/total babe Chris LaMartina. Prepared and served by Jimmy George. Calamari appetizer optional. Be warned, Jimmy George's cooking contains sanity shattering horrors from beyond space and time. Just ask his wife.

Receive the MIDNIGHT CREW STUDIOS BOX SET which includes: 1) An AUTOGRAPHED copy of the BOOK OF LORE/GRAVE MISTAKES DVD. 2) A photo copy of the entire Book of Lore, featuring every page from the book that appears in the movie. 3) A CD featuring the PRESIDENT’S DAY ORIGINAL SCORE. 4) A CD featuring the WITCH'S BREW ORIGINAL SCORE. 5) A PRESIDENT'S DAY T-shirt featuring the infamous masked Lincoln killer. 6) A DVD featuring the entire LOST TRAILER PARK: NEVER COMING ATTRACTIONS web series. 7) A DVDR featuring assorted Midnight Crew Studios shorts including: IMMATURE BURIAL, TRICK OR TWEET, and YESTERMESSENGER. 8) A zip file of our unproduced screenplays including: BARMAGEDDON, DEAD ENDS, DISMEMBER THE DOLLS, and TOMBSTONED. 9) Plus “Special Thanks” in the CALL GIRL OF CTHULHU credits and on IMDB.

A visit to the set of CALL GIRL OF CTHULHU. Witness the making of the film up close and personal. You’ll probably get fake blood or tentacle slime on you, so dress appropriately (travel/lodging costs not included and please whatever you do… DON'T stay at the Witch House). Plus “Special Thanks” in the CALL GIRL OF CTHULHU credits and on IMDB.

Play a masked CTHULHU CULT MEMBER and get killed on screen in CALL GIRL OF CTHULHU plus an acting credit on IMDB. Fluency in Aklo, the language of the Old Ones, preferred. (travel/lodging costs not included and please whatever you do… DON'T stay at the Witch House).

Get a speaking role in the WNUF HALLOWEEN SPECIAL, our upcoming 80's period found footage flick to shot in fall/winter 2012. Plus an acting credit on IMDB (travel/lodging costs not included and please whatever you do… DON'T stay at the Witch House).

Receive a full body massage by Director Chris LaMartina (*nonsexual) while H.P. Lovecraft books on tape play in the background. No happy endings. This is Lovecraft, afterall. There are no happy endings.

Perform a line of dialogue in a cameo role for CALL GIRL OF CTHULHU plus an acting credit on IMDB. Fluency in Aklo, the language of the Old Ones, preferred (travel/lodging costs not included and please whatever you do… DON'T stay at the Witch House).

Chris LaMartina and Jimmy George send you a MYSTERY PACKAGE. As with all Lovecraft stories, the less you know, the better. Resist the urge to send us an email demanding to know more. The reward for this pledge contains unimaginable horrors far beyond the limits of human understanding. If you go through with this pledge, prepare for a long stay in the Arkham Sanitarium.

The last remaining ABE LINCOLN MASK and STOVE-PIPE HAT worn by the infamous killer from our third feature, PRESIDENT’S DAY.

YOUR PRODUCT will be featured in CALL GIRL OF CTHULHU and/or your company’s website will appear in the end credits.

A tour of Baltimore’s creepy haunted locales with Director Chris LaMartina. Plus a Ouija Board session where you will evoke the spirits of the dead. Plus you get to hear Chris’s infamous ghost story from the Lizzie Borden House (travel/lodging costs not included and please whatever you do… DON'T stay at the Witch House).

ASSOCIATE PRODUCER credit in CALL GIRL OF CTHULHU and on IMDB. Plus two reserved tickets to the World Premiere of the film (travel/lodging costs not included and please whatever you do… DON'T stay at the Witch House).

You, Chris LaMartina, and Jimmy George will convene at H.P. Lovecraft's grave in Providence, RI. Using a Ouija Board and a copy of the Necronomicon, we will attempt to contact the spirit of H.P. Lovecraft. Who knows... maybe he's not dead, but dreaming? Plus ASSOCIATE PRODUCER credit in CALL GIRL OF CTHULHU and on IMDB. Plus two reserved tickets to the World Premiere of the film. (travel/lodging costs not included for either rewards and please whatever you do… DON'T stay at the Witch House).

EXECUTIVE PRODUCER credit in CALL GIRL OF CTHULHU and on IMDB. Plus two reserved tickets to the World Premiere of the film (travel/lodging costs not included and please whatever you do… DON'T stay at the Witch House) and the MYSTERY PACKAGE (from our $666 option). Plus regular calls from Cthulhu himself, preparing you for not only the impending collapse of our civilization, but the whole universe.

Receive EVERYTHING LISTED ABOVE (except items limited to 20 or less), plus guaranteed safety in the city of R'lyeh when Great Cthulhu awakens from his slumber and destroys mankind.