Kickstarter

The 32AA (or the “Itty Bitty Titty” level) Get your very own Fagnet Magnet. Your refrigerator will shout: F-A-G + Magnet = Fagnet! You’ll also receive a lovely shout-out on our website!

The 32A (or the “Some People LIKE Them Small” level) Get the magnet PLUS a signed copy of our debut CD, “Mel & El: She’s My Bitch”. It retails for $10, but the signatures are totes worth the extra fiver.

The 34B (or the “Perfectly Respectable” level) Get the magnet PLUS the signed CD PLUS a pair of underwear with the words “Get Out” printed on either the crotch or the bum… you choose the location!

The 36C (or the “Nice Rack” level) Get all of the above, PLUS two tickets to our show, “Mel & El: Our Time of the Month” at Comix in NYC.

The 38D (or the “More Than a Handful” level) Get all of the above PLUS a free cocktail with Mel & El after the show. That’s right, we will DRINK with you. We like dirty martinis with extra olives, but you can have whatever you want.

The 38DD (or the “Bodacious Tatas” level) Get all of the above PLUS we will spend three days tweeting and updating our facebook stati with praises in YOUR NAME. Imagine it: “Pat Smith is our lord and master!” or “We love Pat Smith more than we love chocolate!” or “Pat Smith is hung like Dirk Diggler”. We promise to keep it tasteful if that is your preference.

The 38E (or the “Are Those REAL?” level) Get the whole shebang above PLUS a personalized poem written for you, about you. We will send you your very own copy AND we will post it on our blog. Has anyone ever written you a poem? A GOOD one? We didn’t think so.

The 40F(or the “Extremely Well Endowed” level) Get everything the previous levels get PLUS a personalized rap written and recorded just for you. We don’t write raps for just anybody, and we have definitely NEVER recorded one. This would be a first. With wicked mad beats and everything!

The 42FF (or the “Whatcha gonna do with all that breast...all that breast inside that shirt” level) Get all of the wonderful things we have already described PLUS a day on set with Mel & El + the crew PLUS our undying love. Our love will never die. Ever.

The 42GG (or the "Those Are the Biggest and Best Boobies We Have Ever Seen" level) Get all of the previously mentioned goodness (including that day on set with Mel & El!) PLUS an ASSOCIATE PRODUCER credit on one of our episodes. I mean, you're basically very famous now. Good.

The 44H (or the “This Has Just Gotten Ridiculous” level) Get all of the aforementioned amazingness PLUS a CO-EXECUTIVE PRODUCER credit on one of our episodes PLUS our undying love PLUS our first born child. (We’re just kidding about the child. But you can totally babysit.)