About this project

I titled this project “Never Been Home” to make myself sound tough– like some depression-era street urchin who, when asked where his home is, responds, “Home? I ain't never been home.” But the more research I'm doing and soul-searching I feel like it was the perfect decision.

It's easy to not think about our time with the people we love being the last time we see them, hug them or hear them. It's hard to be brave and reveal your vulnerabilities even to people you know would never want to hurt you. I want to do this to feel at home with my family, friends, Filipinos and make something for anyone who has ever felt out of place in their home, home country or homeland.

My parents immigrated here from the Philippines in the 70s and became citizens through my dad's work in the US Navy. When we were kids, my mom worked various jobs including a cashier at 7-11 while she was pregnant with me but then found work in an office at a bank. My dad finished his contract with the navy and now works for the Norfolk Naval Shipyard as does my brother Mark. There were five of us Sosa kids growing up– Mark is the oldest, then Jon, I'm in the middle age-wise, then my younger sister Anna and then my baby sister Maya.

Dad and Mark

My sisters and possibly my brother Jon are going to the Philippines for the first time in their lives and I would like to document the experience of second generation Filipino-Americans who have never been to the motherland, and who don't speak much Tagalog at all.

Lola and Grandma

I've heard so many great stories growing up. Many of which I overhead in passing conversations with my family and never documented anywhere. Lola, my grandma on my dad's side, sold hand-churned ice cream in the streets. My grandmother on my mother's side, or as we know her, Grandma, had to leave her home during the Japanese Occupation of WWII. My mother told us about Catholic school and how teachers would punish kids by making them kneel before a cross with the back of their hands laid on top of grains of rice. Then the teacher would stack bibles on top the childrens' hands to push the grains of rice into their skin. My dad's sister taught him how to drive at the age of 10. He was too short to reach the pedals of the jeep but they tied boxes to his feet. He was also a rickshaw boy and a tailor. He'd also eaten beetles and other bugs as a kid and once road a bike without brakes down a mountain. I believe it. You would too if you met the guy and you will if this film gets funded.

I have all the tools and skills to make the film but I need you to help fund this project. I'm only asking for the bare minimum of funds to make the film. The expenses will include producing and editing the film, writing, creating graphics, working the sound, translating and subtitling the film and the cost of prepping the final product for broadcast in festivals and other appropriate venues. I'm hoping to shoot around 100 hours of HD footage mixed with however much 16mm film I can afford and edit that down into 45 minutes to an hour. My sisters are planning to be in the Philippines for Christmas and New Years. The holiday season is a boisterous event with parties in the streets, fireworks and lots of food. I want to see what I didn't experience growing up and what life is like for my family in the Philippines and what life would have been like for my brothers and sisters in an alternate reality.

The structure of the film will start with a little of history about the Philippines, an introduction to the story of my siblings, how it relates to my parents and into our trip to and through the country we might have called home, intermixed with some footage from here in the states of my grandma, parents and other relatives and friends. I hope to capture a few days in the lives of different people in the Philippines. A good portion of the film will be about my grandmothers. Grandma lives with my parents at their home in Norfolk. My Lola, a gregarious lady who can crack you up or shut you up, recently returned to Philippines after living in the US for 30 years and this may be our last chance to see her.

The tone of the film of course is left up in the air until I start shooting but I'm inspired by films such as Sherman's March, Gray Gardens, I Am Cuba and the Man Who Could Not See Far Enough. I'd like to use mostly diegetic sound with little added music to affect the perception of the footage but I would like to use some songs recorded by my grandparents on cassette tape.

All the filming in the Philippines would be two weeks and I'd like to have a rough cut by the end of February. I don't want to rush the film but I hope to have finished product before summer of 2012.