Over the weekend the memorably titled Make My Porn Book Pornier project crossed its $1,500 goal, with 44 days still on the clock. Today creator Natty Soltesz posted a project update commemorating his achievement that’s so heartfelt we had to share in full:

A writer friend of mine told me that when he found out his book was going to be published, he cried. I was in the process of sending my book out to publishers, and I told him that if I found out the same thing, I’d probably cry too.

I didn’t cry, though. After I read the email I sat in shock for a moment. A friend happened to stop by my office just then and I told him what had happened. He hugged me and was freaking out but I was too startled to react. But within a few minutes it hit me. Then I danced through the halls of my day job; spent the rest of the week on a high like I’ve never really known.

You know when I did cry? When a good friend of mine gave me my first pledge on Kickstarter. And I’m not entirely sure why.

I think I have a lot of shame when it comes to asking for money. I don’t think I’m alone in this. Americans are individuals. We’re not supposed to ask for help, or need it.

But I did need it. And it took some courage for me to put myself out there, but once I made the decision I could feel it was going to change me, whether it worked out or not.

Thankfully it did work out. It makes me gooey inside every time I think about it. To my backers: an ocean of love.